Today, I was bitched out at 2 a.m. by my parents, for trying to "sneak out." I was sneaking out of my bedroom to take a crap. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my parents heard me leaving my room at 2 am, and freaked out because they thought I was sneaking out. I was too embarrassed to tell them that I was getting food instead of having a social life. FML
Today, I tried being rebellious for the first time in my life by sneaking out past my curfew. I tried to climb out of my bedroom window to stealthily leave the house. I ended up twisting my ankle when I tried to make my "great" escape. FML
Today, my stepmom accused me of creeping around, acting sneaky, and maybe even planning to kill her in her sleep because I’m "still angry at my dad divorcing my mom and marrying her." All I did was get up at 2 a.m. for a pee at coincidentally the same time as she was going outside for a cigarette. FML
Today, I tried to sneakily leave my boyfriend's house at 3 a.m. without his parents knowing. I had a flat tire. FML
Today, I was trying to sneak home from a party. Instead, I head-butted a glass door and woke my mother up. FML
Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home at 1am this morning from a friend's birthday party. I'm 30 years old. FML
Today, I slipped out my bedroom window at night in an attempt to rebel against my parents. Then I realized that I have no friends and nowhere to go, so I tried to climb back in. I fell, broke my ankle, and laid in the dirt until my parents found me in the morning. FML
Today, I got up at 2 AM to grab a snack. I quietly crept down the stairs, only to find my dad, mom, and a couple of their friends having a secret poker game. Now they think I have a sleepwalking problem. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML
Today, I got yelled at for staying in my room too long; got yelled at for going out of my room; got yelled at for staying at a friend's place. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
piedpiper303 29
Well I guess you could say that's a.... *gets shot*
Elric97 9
Next time walk out of your room in a normal way and yell "I'm taking a poop!"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (52)
piedpiper303 29
Well I guess you could say that's a.... *gets shot*
JosephMoore77 8
Oh shit, he just got shot
Medieval_Unicorn 24
SHITTY SITUATION (cowers in corner waiting for ridicule and hatred)
Lilxpie 18
The only time it gets thumbed up
jackthekeeper 24
shotty situation
littlebuggy 10
Well that's kinda crappy of them.
Sandsh8rk 36
Go to the corner & think about what you've done.
Sports_guy3 28
#3's pun was shitty.
applebramble 22
@ #51, oh you hypocrite .
girlrome 19
Jeez, paranoid much?
Morqan_Freeman 14
Is it just me or are the parents freaking out possibly because OP has sneaked out before?
SkyGuy32 17
My mom yelled at me for getting out of bed to pee. Then she blamed a friend that I had had over for a sleepover a couple nights before, saying that he "makes me think I can get up out of bed all the time." My mom is insane.
invadermaythe1st 35
Your mum really is ._.
Dramori 29
Stay in your room and shit in a bag OP!
mrz1177 11
thats bullshit.
Amama_fml 30
No, that's Op's shit.
invadermaythe1st 35
No.
Elric97 9
Next time walk out of your room in a normal way and yell "I'm taking a poop!"
JBChristian 47
Plan B for sneaking out: #7.
annie_nk 22
Last I checked, sneaking out actually involves going out. Of the house.
badmandilon 19
Well, it depends, if you're going out of your room dressed as you're going out of the house, there's reason for suspicion. While if OP was dressed in pijamas the parents are just too imaginative, unless OP did sneak out of the house that way before.
buttcramp 21
yeah the parents should have waited to hear OP going to open the door to go outside and theeen said something!
GuiLD15 7
Well (assuming the OP has 2+ floors in their home), unless you're going to jump through the window, which I don't recommend, your bedroom door is the next step.
Enslaved 36
Does your nightgown look like a party dress?
livinlifeCJ 4
This comment is going to be awkward if OP's a dude.
HowieDoIt 21
Take pics to prove it.
fmlxxsb 6
really?
IAmNotAnAnimal 9
pics or it didn't happen
buttcramp 21
pictures of what? human waste? no.. that's a little much.
stevothedevo 25
That's ****** up
Dthsapprntc 23
OP, I believe that the best solution here would be every time you have to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, knock on your parents door and ask permission.
fmlxxsb 6
no dont knock. just use their bathroom
mhterp90 17
I think OP will be writing a new FML involving brain bleach if they they skip knocking.
rocker_chick105 31
Sounds just like high school...
perdix 29
Caught trying to bring on the midnight Cleveland Steamer, eh?