Today, I was at a club when a notoriously desperate and disgusting guy asked me to grind with him. Hoping for some backup, I coolly said, "You'll have to ask my boyfriend." My boyfriend's response? "Yeah, man, I don't care." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I went to a concert with my boyfriend. I was repeatedly ass-grabbed, grinded on and hit on by guys. My boyfriend's response was, "As long as they continue to bring you free beer, let them get a little feel of what they are paying for." FML
Today, desperate to meet a guy, I went clubbing. The only guy to show any interest opened with, "You're hot, for a black chick!" FML
Today, my boyfriend convinced a girl at the club to break up with her boyfriend and go home with him. She did. Now I'm single too. FML
Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML
Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of a year. A guy starts hitting on her while I'm sitting right next to her. He then asks her to go back to his place for some fun, so I start laughing thinking that there is no chance she would even consider this. I walked home alone. FML
Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML
Today, I was dancing with an incredibly sexy man at a club. He was grinding on me when he leaned over and said, "If I was straight, I would make you my queen." FML
Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML
Today, after months of hardcore flirting with this incredibly attractive guy, he invited me to hang out. At which point he introduced me to his boyfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he was going away for the weekend to go clubbing with his mates. I would be fine with it, except the mates he's going with already tried to get him to cheat on me. FML
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Top comments
nyxiny 22
Is it really that hard to say, "Sorry, but no thank you"?
illmatic2 16
Just tell him to **** off.
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Comments (53)
illmatic2 16
Just tell him to **** off.
gc327072 30
"Well I'd prefer to **** with, and you specifically."
Demonfish 14
People tend to get the message if it's delivered by the wonderful mail service provided by the fist! It's cheap, and when utilised properly, is indeed very efficient :)
gc327072 30
39- only appropriate if he asked in an especially mean/rude manner, like "hey bitch wanna ride me?" THEN you smack him. Not if he's all like "Ma'am I'd like to inquire about dancing with you in a suggestive fashion, would you be interested in such an arrangement?"
Demonfish 14
44- I somehow doubt that the fellow was particularly smooth or polite with his request, seeing as he asked to 'grind'....
Demonfish 14
And make no mistake, I have no problem with more diplomatic methods of dissuasion, they tend to be most useful.
KiddNYC1O 20
1- The boyfriend?
TheLadyOpal 30
It also has the unfortunate side effect of getting the wielder of said fist thrown out of the nightclub and possibly charged with assault. But hey, if you're okay with that, power to you. Personally I think that should only be reserved for actual ass-grabbing.
gc327072 30
^precisely. Blatant thirstiness doesn't merit a fist-to-the-face, but merely show him to the nearest water fountain. Or the door. Or both.
dontpanic_fml 32
How do you believe that going around clocking people who rub you the wrong way is ok, 39? That is a sickly dangerous way of thinking. Somebody should knock you the **** out because you looked at them wrong. See how great of advice it is then.
gc327072 30
62- lol like kindergarten all grown up. Instead of "teacher he's looking at me" it's like *notices person* "DA FUQ U LOOKIN AT BRUH?!"
Sandman366 6
52- Both of them.
AninOnin 24
38 - Which is why (from what I've gathered), she was hoping her boyfriend would give her some back-up.
AninOnin 24
33, sorry!
nyxiny 22
Is it really that hard to say, "Sorry, but no thank you"?
iGottaFindBubbah 12
It's like she's desperate to watch her boyfriend stick up for her. Could've started an unnecessary fight too.
DanielleinDC 33
I think she thought that would scare the creepazoid off. OP, I hope your boyfriend was drunk when he said that. Otherwise, you really need to have a talk with him.
NoFlippinWai 24
maybe she has a problem with confrontation herself.
EvilUndead 9
YOu should drop "sorry", "but", and "thank you" from this phrase.
gagagreensheep 1
The way I see it if he's "notoriously desperate and disgusting" then she probably knew ahead of time that a simple 'no' won't work and so she immediately a tactic that would send most normal guys away. I feel bad that it didn't work out so well for her.
EvilUndead 9
64, when simple "no" doesn't work, you request assistance from club security.
VampTat 10
Sometimes, yes. lol
Nomadic1 20
Lol...nice
zepher93 7
And the coveted number three spot goes to.... That?
evildemonchild 18
You can't say "Don't bother me, I'm with my boyfriend? or what #2 says o.O
joefrazier 20
Just say no.
cardinallove 11
To be fair if the guy is actually "notoriously desperate" and "disgusting", she might have known or surmised that a simple no wouldn't suffice. A significant number of guys don't accept rejection and it unfortunately takes another male to intervene in order to get them to stop.
YepThatsMeee 23
1: "No thanks". 2: "Look I'm here with my bf and don't want to grind with anyone else". 3: " Stop the **** bothering me or I will call the bouncer". 4: Call the bouncer.
krunchy_kitty 8
I'd skip step #2. You don't owe anybody like that an explanation. Just (1) No. (2) I mean it, no. (3) Security!
Pleonasm 35
**** De-blocked by your own boyfriend, must've been that guy's dream come true! Let's hope he didn't grind more than just your gears in the end.
oj101 33
One of your best comments lately, Pleonasm. *strokes my mustache and tips hat you you*
footcheezeez 16
Perhaps she didnt want to say yes herself...
BellaBelle_fml 23
She didn't want to say yes at all…
curlstar 6
Well he obviously wasn't a threat to your boyfriend's confidence. Next time say no yourself, and talk to your man about what you expect in those situations.
poorjudgement 26
Aa long as a woman can avoid putting a man (especially her own man) in this kind of a situation, she should.
ICastillo 24
What's wrong with just saying no? I'm sure the dude has nothing to lose if you say no.
Omfgitsmia 15
You don't need your boyfriend to be your mouthpiece, but that sucks that he didn't have your back.
YepThatsMeee 23
And how would he know that's what she expected? "Sure I'll grind with you if my bf says it's ok!" I know, I know... boyfriends are always expected to be mindreaders.
Omfgitsmia 15
Honestly, she could've said no herself. Since she didn't, I assume she wanted to feel proud or whatever.