Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML
Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML
Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML
Today, a bunch of friends and I went skinny dipping in a pond. The guys all grabbed the ladies' underpants and waved then around. My bloody pad was inside of one of them. FML
Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML
Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. We decided to play chicken and I was on the shoulders of the guy I like. Right as we started playing, for some unearthly reason my body decided to let out a little pee. I thought he wouldn't notice since we were already wet. He did. FML
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Today, marks the third day I've spent with a cute guy who has a crush on me. Before going to a public pool, we had a nice breakfast together. However, the food did not agree with me, so I loudly emptied my guts in the poolside restroom. He sent me home after, and will no longer answer my texts. FML
Today, I dove into the water perfectly, and my bikini bottoms came off. I splashed around nervously. This guy must have thought I was drowning, and dove in to save me. He emerged from the water carrying a half naked girl. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went for a swim in his pool. I was hoping that the swim would be somewhat romantic, however, that came to an abrupt end when he decided that it would be cool and funny to try and lift me up by my boobs. FML
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Top comments
Nyx_fml 23
I wouldn't discard the possibility of him being the culprit and saying that to divert suspicions.
DocBastard 38
I've heard of being **** blocked, but never caca blocked.
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Comments (102)
ComoEsJuan 24
I swear, if anyone does it...
killmenow03 21
Man, what a shitty situation.
killmenow03 21
Butt.. Butt.. I don't wanna leave.
killmenow03 21
Worth it.
eddeeezzyy 19
That's true, 27, but you gotta admit though that 2 had it coming as well for making that statement.
CallMeMcFeelii 13
Hah.. Spectrum.. Rectum.. Haha..
killmenow03 21
It's cuz he's so full of shit! Ahh? Get it? No? Crap:(
Nyx_fml 23
I wouldn't discard the possibility of him being the culprit and saying that to divert suspicions.
golden_warrior 23
It the same thing as the guy who farts and says, something stinks to get the attention away from him.
gc327072 30
Exactly! Naked OP was so hot, he shat himself, blamed them out if embarrassment, and left.
sarah6786 14
I'm just wondering, who the HELL is going swimming in New York right now??? I'm in upstate New York, and it was about 40 degrees today.
doodlecloud 26
Maybe it's an indoor, heated pool at someone's house? Still, you can tell it's in NYC? My phone just says 'United States'..
Nirah_fml 18
That just means he did it.
jkmartinjk 16
He literally dropped the kids off at the pool.
jkmartinjk 16
Well literally as in he was at a pool. But it didn't involve children. I was going to add that to my comment, but I thought it was self explanatory. Guess not
adyb 12
Ah like "he who smelt it, dealt it" except now it's "he who awkwardly leaves, shat in the pool full of naked people"? XD
Rick_Astley_fml 14
Lol well shit
gc327072 30
If you were the guy, you wouldn't have given her up, amirite?
DocBastard 38
I've heard of being **** blocked, but never caca blocked.
pinkshirtbadman 15
This may be my favorite comment I've ever seen on this site.
josh8215 21
You must be new here. Allow me to introduce you to the good doctor.
pinkshirtbadman 15
I'm familiar with the bastard.
Mmkay1515 21
I bet it was your crush who took a dump.
zafan123 6
That guy probably took a shit.
Enslaved 36
Maybe it was just a Baby Ruth? Wow! He scares that quickly when he's surrounded by naked girls?
mustabee 5
#9 can you please clarify your position in the event that there is a turd and naked girls, by the way, turds are normally released with a bit of pee - would you still be in the zone?
Enslaved 36
"Don't let me get in my zone Don't let me get in my zone" (Got me singing Jay-Z) (: Yeah, naked girls must have scared the shit out of him. :P and just so you know, I don't get grossed out easily. They didn't touch the shit, there's chlorine in the pool (it won't be the first time someone peed in it) and most pools have showers right next to it or at least a hose.
mustabee 5
hahahahhahahahahahhahahahah, anyway id be grossed out and pissed but not enough to leave, it wouldnt stop me either, id move the party else where
martin8337 35
It could have been a baby ruth or not.
Enslaved 36
Caddyshack fan too?(:
Anth6ny 9
Maybe he's calling you guys freaks because you don't shit in pools.
CallMeMcFeelii 13
Where else am I going to shit!? I've left so many logs in my neighbors pool.. Sometimes when I'm feeling frisky I'll even do it in their hot tub! Ah.. The joy of taking a dump in someone else's pool is sooo much better than taking a dump in the bowl..