Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying, "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were watching TV, I asked him if he loved me. He turned up the volume. FML
Today, I was lying on the couch with my boyfriend and was feeling tired, so I got a soda. I sat back down and surprised him with a passionate kiss. I also surprised him when I suddenly burped right into his mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
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Top comments
nycwrestler 17
Sounds like you made him feel awkward, OP. A for effort, though.
EsotericBrent 29
That was his way of saying he loves you too!
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Comments (80)
Mads_1234 28
Eww, sorry OP.
khaya 9
It could have been worse, he could have bit her.
howdeedoo 22
What does biting have to do with this FML?
BlowinChronic 18
It's okay, I'm sure OP with gladly accept your apology.
blcksocks 19
You don't have to apologize. Everyone has a different way to acknowledge things. Mine is to do a chicken dance... And I ain't sorry for that.
Roevera 14
Could of been worse.. Could have said "cool story bro".
nycwrestler 17
Sounds like you made him feel awkward, OP. A for effort, though.
X_Codes 11
Awkwardness or no... how does someone even come up with this? So weird...
Grauncho 27
He sounds loge a jolly waste of time.
rockstar362 8
Perhaps he was drunk?
sens3sfailing 24
hey, he is a good enough boyfriend to get OP to love and adore him, so i doubt this is common behavior. we can all be idiots at the wrong time sometimes trying to be funny.
bestnameright 14
Hey at least he thought it was jolly good! And his accent was affected so that means something. Besides you can feel good knowing your a jolly good girlfriend!
_duhastmich 11
Affected means fake not affectionate..
bestnameright 14
I know I meant it in the sense of all her loving words had an effect on him.
joshiepo0 18
It's the language of love. Just take it in, while holding your breathe that is.
sunkissedluster 20
I'm not saying dump him, but seriously reassess your relationship with that friend. He's got issues for sure. :
nycwrestler 17
Sounds more like she is overly attached.
igive 29
She'll be the new Pete poop.
sens3sfailing 24
At least we knew petepoop was a troll. This one thinks they are intelligent.
EsotericBrent 29
That was his way of saying he loves you too!
VScpu 3
Didn't you know OP, that is how it is done in Britain
HortonThelephant 15
For as many days as I am doomed to suffer on this miserable rock, I will never truly understand why people with even one iota of intelligence choose to suffer in such relationships. It will never last. Good luck in the meantime.
RaggleFrock 13
Your profile picture should be Eeyore, not Horton.
brackaman 18
No offense, but I noticed it's mostly people who can't get someone they like to like them back who say things like that. I'm in a happy relationship and I'm quite sure I possess more than one iota of intelligence.
nunu76 4
lol miserable rock..tru dat ill nvr gt it either..dump his dumb ass n as The great Johnny Walker says- keep walkin
sniken 14
Atleast he gave you a positive response and did not stare blankly right at you before resuming a movie.
DrunkButterfly 17
Sounds like you should tell him "Cheerio, old chap!"