Today, I taught my kid how to mow the lawn. It's a self-propelling mower so it's easy to handle. My kid thought it would be smart to tie the handle down so that he wouldn't have to push it at all. This resulted in the lawn mower blasting through our fence and sinking into my neighbor's pool. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weed-whacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgot that I was mowing where the dogs take dumps, I absentmindedly whacked over dog poop… which got flung into my face. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to mow a dick into my grandmother's lawn, but the mower leaked gasoline and now there's a giant dead grass outline. FML
Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML
Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics, I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML
Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML
Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML
Today, I agreed to lend my daughter's inflatable pool to my neighbor for the day. Barely an hour later, I witnessed his son jump off their balcony, missing the pool by inches. He's now in hospital, and my neighbor has sworn to sue me, saying I'm responsible because the pool is mine. FML
Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire two acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML
Today, I left my phone outside on the grass while I went inside to get a drink. I didn't expect my dad to run over it with the lawn mower. FML
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Top comments
WhiteCrimson 23
Points for innovative thinking! F on thinking it through first!!!
You_Screwed_Up 7
At least he was trying to be creative in his laziness!
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Comments (105)
kenoswild 14
He probably watched too many robot vacuum commercials and thought it'd do the same. Silly kid.
not_a_robot 15
In hindsight, it was still a terrible idea.
Clay_Pidgeon 11
I don't know how old your kid. But If he's over the age of 12, he's a retart
gc327072 31
Well being a retart is better than being a retard.
Clay_Pidgeon 11
I thumbed down my own comment for that mistake.
Twonty2 6
Thank you.
WhiteCrimson 23
Points for innovative thinking! F on thinking it through first!!!
mattjamt 16
He's going to be a great engineer when he grows up
DyslexicPanda 12
Actually, that'd be a very, very bad engineer.
WhiteCrimson 23
You never know man, the kid might just turn out to be the next Albert or Steve? He still has time to develop. Everything was built of flaws in the beginning
allie2590 31
Well, here's to hoping his next bright ideas don't end up in the neighbour's pool.
mattjamt 16
34 - It truly is a shame that you don't understand the concept of sarcasm. You have my condolences.
laden_swallow09 35
Your scathing deriding, 66, is unfounded. I'm sure had 34 been listening as opposed to reading the joke, he would've picked up on the sarcastic same tone you so affectionately adopt as 12 used.
You_Screwed_Up 7
At least he was trying to be creative in his laziness!
FMLkoala 28
What's your favourite idea!? Mine is being creative!
ikilledaman 9
Now let's all agree, to never be creative again.
fertilegod 3
I. guess he needs more chores to battle that kind of laziness and to help him understand how to handle these jobs without making a mess and of course to work off the damages.
carina_47 16
He'll be an engineer one of these days ... hopefully XD
strike2867 13
I hope not.
LegolasPrincess 10
He'll be a terrible engineer if he keeps that up, he'll never keep a job to save his life.
gooddealjoe 7
#5 Hopefully? How would you like to ride in a plane if he built one?
10nachoman10 24
I don't really think you taught him all too well, maybe make it clearer in future. Bad luck OP!
hcollins1 18
I'm severely allergic to grass and only mowed it once in the 22 years I've been alive and I'm sure I can do a better job than that kid.
isallwaysme 27
at least you'll have a damn funny story in a few years when he grows up
Norvi 26
OP can use it as embarrassment blackmail for years to come!
rt156 16
Sounds like something you would see in a movie,atleast your son doesnt mind working despite having screwed up in the end.
R3TROxLOV3 32
I feel like if he didnt mind working, he would have pushed it himself. Him tying it down stemmed from pure laziness, not any kind of attempt at innovation or hard work.
CharresBarkrey 16
Work smarter, not harder.
rt156 16
So i guess he agreed just to get op off his back
HiImNew 3
Smart kid.
ja2006 9
He's experimenting with laziness. It's a trial and error process.
Horsempeg 25
There is a video over the internet where someone does this. The lawnmower goes around in a circle simply by tying a rope to a steak, and tying another rope to the clutch!