Today while at my job as a store clerk, I walked by a family. I smiled at their little boy, who responded by flipping me off. As I was walking away, I looked back in time to catch his dad give him a high-five. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, at my job as a cashier, a man and his 3-year old son got in line. The father said, "Give this to the pretty lady," looking at me. The kid looks at me, looks at his dad, and walks over to the next cashier. FML
Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML
Today, I was at a supermarket when I saw a guy waving enthusiastically at me. I waved back, smiling like an idiot. He kept waving, so I waved harder, even giving him the ole finger guns. Then his actual friend walked up behind me, and I realized he wasn’t waving at me at all. The cashier witnessed everything and whispered, “Yikes.” FML
Today, while out walking with my son in a stroller, a couple passed by and the girl smiled sweetly at him. It made me really happy, until we'd passed and I heard her say, "What? You're supposed to smile at babies, even if they look weird." FML
Today, I fistbumped a cashier as they tried to hand me my change. FML
Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML
Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML
Today, I was at work as a grocery store cashier. I felt a hand slap my ass. Turning around I saw an old man winking at me and I screamed. When my manager came to deal with the problem she didn't believe me and gave the man a $25 gift card for "the trouble" I caused. FML
Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML
Today, at my job working retail, I had just finished cleaning and straightening a whole aisle. This kid watched me do the whole thing. When I was done, he stuck his arm out, and ran it down the whole shelf, knocking everything off it. His mother just grabbed his hand and walked away. FML
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Top comments
rg350dx 29
Wel,l you know what they say. The rotten apple doesn't fall far from the douchebag tree.
biggestfan23 11
I hate this world
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Comments (75)
flashback.miss 28
Should've faked charging at him. What happened to cordial respect? The father seems more the type to reward bratty behavior.
lopsop 12
I don't think charging at a little kid is respectful either.
goose12321 11
#39 Why respect a fucktard kid that has no respect for anyone? The kid needs a good belting, not a high 5.
rg350dx 29
Wel,l you know what they say. The rotten apple doesn't fall far from the douchebag tree.
rg350dx 29
Wel,l... Yeah, that's definitely a word.
Iamevil123 16
Technically, it's "well" spelt wrong and a random "I".
MzZombicidal 36
Actually it's just a misplaced comma in the word "well."
Iamevil123 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
It's both my friend.
rg350dx 29
The only thing that matters is it's a glaring grammatical error and around these parts, that's pretty much a death sentence. So cue the burying, you judgmental bastards you.
Kefka91 15
Dudes, it was a minor typo, not a grammatical error, and you still understood what he said, so get over yourselves.
BjgUsername 12
Dont worrys so much 34, you's gots good grammer
fymother 13
USA! USA! USA!
legendxs 20
Hahahah nicely put.
biggestfan23 11
I hate this world
Pwn17 25
Join the club man. I hate it too.
rg350dx 29
Only if you guys have jackets.
perdix 29
#13, do you know how much it costs to get "Misanthropes United" embroidered on a jacket? Hint: It will give you a reason to hate the world even more!
Axipiter 24
There's a philanthropist looking for people to apply for a one way trip to colonize Mars. I suggest you make a submission video.
technochik3 12
#58, technically mars is a part of this same world. earth is not a world, it is a planet. So saying you hate this world means you hate mars too.
roro_superloser 13
Should've flipped him off back!
Iamevil123 16
And lower yourself to the level of a young child? I don't think so...
FlyingLeumer 19
Seriously, the maturity levels of some people scares me.
roro_superloser 13
I think so! They're not kids anymore. They're the devils sprawn.
StiffPvtParts 43
Like father, like son --_--
xiaodoggiie 5
Why was this comment thumbed down? The father was probably an ass and hence taught his son to be one.
Nolimit2217 32
Kids these days..
Huddisher 10
Great parenting.
Dempsey_xoxo 7
Why is #7 getting thumbed down? Or am I the only one that took it as sarcasm?
rob02 19
HAHA, that's funny
Iamevil123 16
Your comment however, is not.
rob02 19
So?
ZeroPath5 16
We come to FML for witty comments! Not your opinion! Shame! :/
darwinism 30
walk past the kid and slip something in his pocket. When he walks out security will get him for shoplifting. The watch as the father high fives the back of his head. Evil, but it could bring a little satisfaction.
Jemm_fml 29
I hope he high fives him when he gets older and realizes his son is a loser whose made a total mess of his life and can't communicate with society without being a total asshole.