Today, in the small hours of the morning, my roommate's boyfriend kicked his foot through the thin wall separating our bedrooms during sex. They didn't even stop. FML
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Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML
Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked him out, and he stood outside the door calling my name until he saw my roommate coming down the hall. They both came in and he acted like nothing happened. FML
Today, my roommate brought a guy home at 3:30am. Not having a condom, she ran into my room to borrow one of mine. She was overzealous, jumped onto my bed, and cracked two of my ribs. She then took the condom, left me lying paralyzed with pain, and then had very loud sex, which I heard. FML
Today, while spending the night at a friend's house, I was woken up by someone kicking me. I figured she was having a nightmare, and since we were sharing a bed, I reached over to wake her up. Turns out it was her boyfriend trying to push me off the bed because they were having sex. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to put his penis in a hole in our bedroom wall. FML
Today, I listened to my roommate having sex from 3 a.m. until 6 a.m. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML
Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML
Today, I came home to find out my roommate had sex in my bed, because he didn't want his date to know he has a smaller bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML
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Top comments
Zimmington 21
Next time start tickling his feet so It's kind of a threesome
ImAFaker 29
Doesn't matter had sex?
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Comments (91)
ImAFaker 29
Doesn't matter had sex?
BeccaHugs 17
Find a new roommate or move, OP. That's inconsiderate and just flat out gross. You shouldn't have to see your roommate and her boyfriend having sex.
euphoricness 28
OP's roommate is so rude. The least they could've done was invite her in. Tsk tsk
amDes 11
The damage was already done, why stop? After finishing is when they can start worrying!
Gingerette 8
@ #1: if anybody had sex in the last thirty minutes then you're qualified to sing with me!
incoherentrmblr 21
Animal House?
firegirl1993 21
You gotta admire that dedication though.
daniel_dd31 13
There was no stopping that wild ride.
Horsempeg 25
They probably were having intense sex, didn't want to miss out on an ******. Did you stay..??
Ambient25 24
...would you?
HeyHeyFishFillet 34
Since they didn't bother stopping, OP may as well start recording them and try to sell the tape to a **** company.... No? Excuse me as I head back to my creep corner.
Horsempeg 25
No #44, was just plain curious is all !
beaglegal 42
Must have been pretty intense...
tompou6 19
Hope he paid for the repairs, though you may also want to put a steel plate in there XD
Zimmington 21
Next time start tickling his feet so It's kind of a threesome
perdix 29
#5, this morning, the topic of toe-sucking came up...
Zimmington 21
#24- I hadn't read that until after I made this comment. Maybe sucking them would've made it kinkier.
CallMeMcFeelii 13
I still like the thought of OP tickling them. That'd be hilarious. If somebody tickled my feet while having sex I don't know if I would be be to continue on. Or it would end up being amazing from all the twists and thrusts the tickling would cause.
iknowiwantyou 13
tell us more
Mdhughey 7
It was just too good lol.
TheComedyAudio 29
Throw a college math book at them
NotAddictive 6
So specific...
cakefete2 30
Bad idea. Those things are so big, OP could get arraigned on attempted murder charges.
Cazz91 21
Sometimes you just have to finish when you're in the middle of the best part. Hopefully he pays for the damage.
evan_7899 28
Then sit back and enjoy the show
sunnyray812 42
I can see that happening in a comedy film.