Today, the kid next to me asked me, in all seriousness, if gay people have feelings like regular people. I'm gay, and I have to sit next to this barnacle until June. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, a coworker was telling me he was lonely and needed someone special in his life. I replied, "Why don't you find yourself a girlfriend?" He looked at me weird and said, "I'm gay." FML
Today, I learned that the girl I love thinks I'm gay. To be honest, I'm having doubts too. FML
Today, after three weeks of putting it off, I decided to ask out the girl I've had a major crush on since third grade. When I told her, she smiled, but then quickly said, "But aren't you gay?" FML
Today, I found out that my entire school differentiates me from another girl in my grade with the same name by saying, "No, she's the lesbian one." I'm straight. FML
Today, my sister gently asked me if I was gay. Turns out I've been without a boyfriend for so long that the whole family believes I secretly have a girlfriend. FML
Today, I talked to a girl I like. I tried to make her jealous by telling her I had a "thing" going with another girl. She looked deeply into my eyes and said, "Wait, aren't you gay?" FML
Today, my daughter was telling everyone at her elementry school about my gay partner. Yes, I have a gay partner. He is my work partner and he happens to be gay. FML
Today, I found out the reason my crush has been talking so openly to me. Not because she likes me back, but because she thinks I'm gay. FML
Today, I learned why a guy at work hates me when he drunkenly confessed it at a work retreat. Apparently I look like a gay teenager he had a horrible awkward one-night stand with, and every time he sees me he gets mad at himself. I could have gone my whole life without knowing that. FML
Today, while I was babysitting my nephews, the 7 year old boy walked up to me and asked if I was a lesbian. I laughed it off. An argument ensued about my sexuality for a good two hours. I lost. FML
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Top comments
imchacon22 19
Ignorant people
WompWompWomp123 7
Tell him, "Not only do I have feelings, I have super powers as well!"
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Comments (198)
imchacon22 19
Ignorant people
TheCanucklehead 22
I know I should focus on the FML and the ignorance... But what a great choice word: barnacle. Reminiscent of Spongebob Squarepants.
\ 28
Tell him they do have feelings... for you. :)
amberlyyyy 15
Ignant
dinosxxrawr 22
do ignorant people have feelings like normal people?
JMichael 25
54- no, ignorant people don't feel a thing. That's why they're considered ignorant. Haven't you heard ignorance is bliss?
rosaaaa_fml 6
Ah, what a missed opportunity for early child death..
onaa3r 10
true, he's ignorant, but at least he has a year to indulge in "Mysteries of the Gay" volume 1. In all seriousness, he was being silly, but fortunately, he is willing to learn, and I'd say that's a plus.
swaggalikethat 22
FYL for saying "barnacle". Just take a deep breath Squidward…
countryrose92 23
I feel that as long as he isn't being cynical then his question should receive an honest response. Some people honestly don't understand and want to be able to ask those questions openly, for example by ex asked his lesbian boss, "r u the guy or girl in the relationship" he wasn't being cynical just was curious and wanted to ask so know more about her. Some people are ignorant but dont mean harm from it. Is say answer him then move on. No harsh feelings, unless he was trying to be rude.
tjv3 10
My question is why is the word used to describe or reference homosexual people "gay"? And why is the symbol must often used to reference homosexuals the rainbow ? This is very uninventive and plain.
SonOfAMitch 14
#171 Seriously? Y-you're being seriou- *sigh*
ambitiousnygrl 17
The ignorance of some people is absolutely astounding. Sorry about that OP.
BellaBear90 27
What an absolute jackass. How can people still be so ignorant? Good luck educating the barnacle.
TaiReiSi 12
Hey, at least he was trying to expand his knowledge. Can't blame him for that
myoukei 31
I would rather educate the curious ignorant then allow them to believe whatever delusions they have about me :/
WompWompWomp123 7
Tell him, "Not only do I have feelings, I have super powers as well!"
ridemyrocket 9
No vegans are the only ones with super powers get it right!
snugglesMcGee199 23
Maybe people didn't find that joke funny while watching Scott Pilgrim.
allie2590 31
I did, but put enough drinks in me and I'll find just about anything funny.
kitsune309 15
I found the vegan.
Jerepasaurus 12
This is the best possible reply. The world is now a better place for you having made it. lol
caitylynn05 16
Kids these days... Sorry OP!
Alicestraza 33
Pretty sure most kids from older generations would be a lot worse than this guy.
\ 28
Watch the PSA "Boys Beware" on youtube and you'll see just how homophobic people were in the 50s.
xSkittle 16
It's not about the kids, I'd say it's mostly older people. I don't blame my grandparents tough, it's how they were raised and they have seen a lot of drastic changes already. But 30y/o people should really know better.
IworkAt711 14
58- I'm not trying to say anything bad about your grandparents, but they should really know better too. One of my grandpa's good friends were gay, and he didn't give half a **** about it.
xSkittle 16
I know, but a lot has changed the past years and sometimes they have trouble with how things are going now. When they were young nobody dared to come out of the closet and now they see men kissing and gay parades, I understand this is a shock for them because it's nothing like they are used to see.
Daiyuki 5
96- No one should give half a **** about who anyone else is screwing/likes to screw anyway. Unless that involves your significant other/family/children of course. Some things just aren't cool no matter how you look at them.
xSkittle 16
On the other side, why would you care so much about what others think about you
SmilieAKD 20
I would have to agree that the older generation is a lot more ignorant. I was talking to this older couple one day, like my parents age, and they couldn't believe how many gays and lesbians there are today. They honestly believe that there weren't that many of them back in their day. They think of it like it's some kind of sudden epidemic. All I could think was haven't you ever heard of Ancient Greece. It's so sad how long people had to hide and in many case feel they still have to hide.
JaegerMayCry 13
Well, It'd be best that you explain to him that you do possess feelings, or that you look for different seating arrangments if he irks you that much. There is not much you can do at this point. Maybe you can still educate him? Although it might be too late.
snugglesMcGee199 23
I agree. It sounds stupid to ask, but maybe this kid comes from a reference point of homosexuality being a sin and had likened it to homosexuals not having feelings? Maybe this is your chance to spread a little education/common sense, OP. :)
underthesea12 24
why not just say gay people are regular people?
needsomefunny 15
Maybe you should show him ;)
Zimmington 21
Yeah, because coming on to him will positively change his opinion of gays...
Treveyon56 14
Okay OP I need q name, address, and picture of this target. We must make sure he never breeds and spread this ignorance.
evan_7899 28
I know I will get down voted for this but why did that go under? A perfectly funny comment to be buried. The FML community has turned to sappy assholes.
happle 21
I thought it was lame to be honest.
Zimmington 21
95- Same. The whole "Don't let it breed." thing is getting kind of old.
ottokat 15
"the fml community has turned to sappy assholes" oh honey this is all there ever was
Everyday_Galaxy 14
If they are anything like the barnacle off of How I Met Your Mother should actually be legen......... ..............wait for it........ .......dary! legendary!
SmuggletheBudgie 15
Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle, he was so ugly, everybody died! The end.
acid_moose 7
Considering Neil Patrick Harris is gay, I think he'd feel a strong distaste for the 'barnacle' OP is referring too.
alwaysmalia 12
Did you really just say barnacle?
tinyrosie 21
Yes, yes they did.
daniel_dd31 13
Nice and refreshing word for a change. Reminds me of the good old days watching squidward go crazy over spongebobs crazy stunts.
evan_7899 28
indeed, too many people overuse todays insults and we forget how effective the ye old ones are