By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 08:29 - United States - Inglewood

Spicy
Today, I tried to be cute by sitting on top of my boyfriend's belly. While getting on top, I accidentally kneed him in his nuts. In pain, he jolted his head up and ended up banging his head against mine. Now I have a black eye and he can't walk without waddling. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 902
You deserved it 44 378

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Banging your boyfriend till he walks funny. Somehow I don't think that's what he had in mind.

Bliss391 7

I'm sorry, but I just don't understand how sitting on his belly would be cute. It really just sounds uncomfortable.

Comments

Accidents happen, both of you will probably laugh about this in the very near future. Look at it this way, that would one hell of a funny story for a party.

Cool story bro, do you tell it at parties?

I'm guessing he wouldn't like you when you are angry. The Incredible Duck might come out...

I can't take you serious with your profile pic.

Once the pain goes away, the whole experience will probably be pretty funny.

Agreed. If someone saw you both in that condition simultaneously... I can only imagine the look on their face! I had something similar happen and I got a black eye from it as well... Hahaha but trust me, it's gonna make a great tale!

i hope your black eye heals and im sure you will laugh about it someday

41. Why. Thread. Jack. And. Why. Break. This.

No. She. Doesn't. What's wrong with trying to be cute? Nothing is the answer.

No. You. Aren't. And. I. Hate. That. I. Can't. Stop. Reading. Like. That.

So. Do. I. And. I. Sound. Like. A. Robot

You. Saw. That. Failed. When. Someone. Else. Did. It. So. Why. Try.

Worst. Thread. To. Try. And. Read. Ever.

Perhaps writing in a long conglomerated manner will ease the reader's ability to read coherently albeit being confused by the run on sentence and the fact that too many ideas are being squashed into one singular sentence, ultimately culminating in wholehearted confusion on the reader's part and frustration on the writer's part as he muses angrily on why some philosophers (like Foucault, pertinently) insist on writing in such an obscure manner; if unable to convey, confuse.

Banging your boyfriend till he walks funny. Somehow I don't think that's what he had in mind.

That comment and this story made my day

Man that'll be a knee-slapper to tell at parties!

nycwrestler 17
Bliss391 7

I'm sorry, but I just don't understand how sitting on his belly would be cute. It really just sounds uncomfortable.

It's the new thing, all the cool kids are doing it.

All. The. Cool. Kids. Talk. Like. This. Now. Too.

Have you never playfully sat on someone to pin them down to say. . .tickle him? It could be cute in their relationship. (: To each their own.

Laurenlou 24

OP is probably thin and light. Otherwise, I'm sure OP would hurt anyone if she sat on their stomach. I always sit on my boyfriend's stomach and he doesn't get uncomfortable or hurt. Although, I don't find it cute unless we are kissing or something of that nature.

hokie16 13

It's more sexy and arousing than anything. I mean, it's the visuals of girl on top without direct stimulation. I do that all the time, and they are definitely picturing you sitting a few inches lower.

yoursucklives 36

i often sit on top of my boyfriend. it usually leads to kissing which then leads to sex. i don't know if thats consideres cute, but he never complaines.

Well, you can roll on top of them and sort of straddle their pelvis. That can be fun and not at all awkward.

celiiceegee 6

But what if he needed to fart.. Or worse, poop ._.

I don't think that's what my beautician cousin meant when she told me, "It hurts to be beautiful," as she yanked on my hair in styling it.

But Miss Walrus you don't have any hair...

*whispers in Castillo's ear to look at her snout and remember that walruses are mammals so they are required to have hair.*

nycwrestler 17

Real cute kneeing him in the nuts!

Big_lama6 7

Sounds more like F his life. Poor guy, nothing worse than getting hit in the nuts

Putting icy-hot on after wards, while getting your kidney cut out with a rusty blade?

I usually don't do this kind of thing, but I think you are adorable! I might just stare at your picture all day. I don't mean it in a creepy way, of course.

How did you manage to knee him in the balls is my question...

Bliss391 7

Im guessing She's not very coordinated.