Miscellaneous: What are the odds?

What are the odds?

By pchis4ever - 20/11/2009 18:30 - United States

Today, I was eating at KFC when my roommate unexpectedly showed up. He asked me who I was there with, and I told him I was on a sexy date with his mom. Just then a woman 5 feet away turned around and gave me a disgusted look. Guess whose mom was in town visiting for the weekend? FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 624

You deserved it 37 117

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/01/2012 05:32 - United States

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 361

You deserved it 2 625

By lifesux - 05/02/2011 21:28 - South Africa

Today, my mom and I were escorted out of the KFC because my mom tried to mug and pick a fight with another customer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 035

You deserved it 3 954

Nice try

By bigmouth - 02/08/2009 07:35 - United States

Today, I was working as a host at a pasta diner. The hostess I was working with was very attractive and we were flirting quite a bit. A large woman walked in to be seated, and I leaned over to her and dared her to ask the woman if she wanted two chairs. She leaned back and said, "That's my mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 806

You deserved it 76 241

And I oop

By SuperBunny - 20/04/2009 07:59 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was taking me to dinner to meet his parents. As we pulled into the restaurant valet, I saw a woman in a slutty dress and hooker heels get out of the car ahead of us. I jokingly asked if we had accidentally pulled into a strip club, pointing at the woman. It was his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 850

You deserved it 62 007

Weird flex, but OK

By incestastic - 14/08/2010 23:23 - Canada

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently, my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she's embarrassed of my real brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 465

You deserved it 3 067

My mum is weird

By Anonymous - 03/11/2023 16:00

Today, my mum came to visit me in the country where I'm studying. We went out, and when she saw a dude eating something she liked the look of, she made me run after him to ask where he bought it. The guy was my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 96

By crawfo - 31/08/2009 13:54 - Australia

Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 323

You deserved it 12 065

By sonofmilf - 17/05/2009 05:46 - United States

Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 947

You deserved it 6 405

Nice to meet you… again

By pleaseno - 24/07/2009 00:52 - United States

Today, my mother invited me to a nice restaurant to meet her boyfriend whom she's been seriously dating for a month. Imagine my surprise when she led me to a table and my boyfriend's father stood up, shocked, to greet me. Rather than being horrified, she is now planning double dates every week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 526

You deserved it 3 150

By Brian - 20/11/2012 15:50 - United States - Sandston

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 300

You deserved it 33 305

allmidnighteyes 10

Friday 20 November 2009 23:14

YDI for eating at KFC, and for thinking "your mom" jokes still hold any comedic value.

rosy_fml 0

Friday 20 November 2009 23:16

You could've just ended with "His mom was in town visiting for the weekend". Don't tell us what to do.

Comments

xoxoinlove 4

Saturday 21 November 2009 5:34

tat is so FML worthy lol haha

myfriend_youfail 3

Saturday 21 November 2009 6:35

Why would he assume you were there with someone? Seriously, if he asks "who are you here with?", he's left himself open to a few "your mom" jokes. He's a tool, his mom can't take a joke that's probably even older than she is, and both of them together ruined your lunch. FYL.

I_am_stupid_also 6

Saturday 21 November 2009 8:09

So your roommate mom is visiting him and he takes her to the KFC to eat? That's a whole other FML right there. She probably had that disgusted look on her face even before she turned around. Did you get her phone number?

Phinehas 0

Saturday 21 November 2009 9:23

YDI. "Your mom" jokes are tired, repetitive, vulgar, and downright retarded. As far as I'm concerned, anyone who uses them deserved to be shot.

drkwlf 0

Saturday 21 November 2009 15:36

Yeah, well, your mom thought it was funny. ... (:

thatnewyorker 0

Saturday 21 November 2009 9:27

His mom would've giggled if I was in that situation.

hey_guy 0

Saturday 21 November 2009 9:47

hahahaha man this is hilarious, you don't deserve it, mom jokes are amazing just **** your life for saying it at the wrong moment

TJack 0

Saturday 21 November 2009 14:42

I love how the voting essentially boils down to whether or not "your mom" jokes are funny. As for me, I enjoy them, but hate when someone uses them all the time. As for the FML, you had no idea that his mom was visiting. FYL

greent_fml 0

Saturday 21 November 2009 19:47

i love how completely irrelevant the KFC part is. made my day :)

blastvortex 3

Saturday 21 November 2009 20:05

You stepped into that one. Of course, had she been at least decently cool, she could've taken it as an inadvertent compliment (or at least taken the gag and ran with it). Just think of how much it must suck to have such an uptight prick for a mother. This is definitely your friend's FML, not yours.