Miscellaneous: Today, while standing completely still at Walmart, I was hit...

By skidmark - 08/12/2011 14:48 - United States

Today, while standing completely still at Walmart, I was hit by a drunk man on a Jazzy Scooter. He laughed, said it was an accident, gunned the scooter and took out two more people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 427

You deserved it 2 671

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/07/2013 16:53 - United States - Concord

Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 645

You deserved it 3 598

He started it, sorry

By Anonymous - 13/04/2022 15:01 - United States

Today, a drunk in a wheelchair tried to fight me. I walked away as he kept hurling insults. He then rammed his chair into my legs, making me fall. I walked away again. Upon the second time, I got up and punched him dead in his face, knocking him backward. I was tackled to the ground for hitting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 057

You deserved it 144

Those things are lethal

By Anonymous - 15/12/2021 23:01 - New Zealand - Hamilton

Today, I was riding an electric scooter on my way to work when a car sped out of a driveway and hit me. Not only did I end up in hospital, but I missed my job on the second day back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 126

By never thought I'd say that - 22/08/2013 19:05 - Norway - Stavanger

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by pissing by some drunken loon on a segway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 721

You deserved it 2 841

Black out

By Rude awakening - 28/10/2020 14:01 - Netherlands - Utrecht

Today, I blacked out while riding my electric scooter. Luckily, I was quickly jolted awake when my chin hit the tarmac. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 202

By lions214 - 11/01/2012 01:40 - United States

Today, at work at a store, I was sitting on the floor stocking a bottom shelf. A woman in a motorized cart did not see me, and ran over my hand. When I alerted her about what she had done she laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 391

You deserved it 2 930

By Krystyn Gareau - 09/09/2011 04:10 - Canada

Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 091

You deserved it 13 683

Dude, are you OK?

By Anonymous - 29/06/2022 12:00 - Canada - Thornhill

Today, I was at work at Walmart, casually walking in the middle of the store, when my foot caught on something, so I went flying forward and yelled, being caught off guard, to the point I had to pretend I was running for 3 seconds, then someone blocked my path so I suddenly had to stop. Everyone was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 580

You deserved it 304

Stuck

By Tabeling101 - 12/12/2016 01:51

Today, I was in Walmart on a motorized cart and got stuck on a clothing rack next to a super hot guy. Panicking, I said "I just had surgery, I'm a new driver." After failing to get myself unstuck he had to pull the clothes rack and I apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 612

You deserved it 1 460

By Garry the Gluten-Free Pizza - 13/09/2016 21:17 - United States

Today, I was carjacked. As he shoved me away from my car, I got hit by another car. He and the other car both drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 630

You deserved it 1 044

Heeeerroin 5

Thursday 8 December 2011 18:47

Honestly thought it said Jizzy...

smdthinks 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 18:50

I'd expect nothing less from walmart shoppers.

Comments

perdix 29

Thursday 8 December 2011 20:19

He meant it was an accident he ran into you -- with a name like "skidmark," I'm guessing you're gross even by Walmart standards. He was obviously using the scooter to "take out" cute girls. You Walmart people have some crazy courting rituals.

eddyg94 11

Thursday 8 December 2011 20:33

probably ought to have seen/heard a drunk on a scooter coming?

1seven1 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 20:34

Not a bad day of shopping at wal-mart where fantasy/horror land meet

geon_olam 17

Thursday 8 December 2011 21:01

well the song says that its the most wonderful time of the year and songs dont lie.

michellelynnae 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 21:04

Wal-Martians

rubberduckie94 13

Thursday 8 December 2011 21:19

"Tarnation at these kids today standing still in the aisle blocking the metamucil. back in my day we just grabbed our shit and got out. I'll show him to stand still its almost time for the peoples court i have to get home.". BOOM.

Donniehw 5

Friday 9 December 2011 5:11

I read that in the best old drunk dude voice I could think of xD Herbert is awesome...

daydreamer244 13

Thursday 8 December 2011 21:30

He obviously enjoyed it ;)

vip3r20 8

Thursday 8 December 2011 21:31

maybe you should've moved...

taternuts 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 22:07

Moving targets are harder to hit, next time don't be so lazy and try to get out of the way. I'd honestly feel bad for you if you didn't stand there and watch two more people get hit without warning them