Wanker and Intimacy: Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in...

By John - 21/10/2014 00:29 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 431

You deserved it 14 475

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/11/2017 22:00 - United States - Littleton

Today, my 14-year-old sister came into the bathroom while I was in it. When she saw me, she said sorry and left. Little did I know, she took my electric toothbrush to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 812

You deserved it 559

By jessefonsexy. - 07/12/2010 11:08 - United States

Today, I was trying to go to sleep when I heard my sister come home from the bar. I fell asleep and woke up an hour later to see my sister squatting in my dresser drawer. I asked her what she was doing and she said "I'm peeing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 136

You deserved it 2 769

By FullMonty - 15/09/2012 23:26 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 059

You deserved it 3 980

By 2gewd4u - 15/01/2012 01:24 - United States

Today, I walked in on my sister sitting on the toilet, trying to use "The Force" to pull over the toilet paper roll sitting on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 235

You deserved it 4 079

Bad pranks are annoying

By Anonymous - 17/01/2020 20:00

Today, my sister snuck into the bathroom while I was in the shower (the lock is broken) and took my clothes and towels. I came out and quickly went to my room. As I went in, my sister was sitting on my bed with two friends watching TV. I instantly covered up, but they saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 680

You deserved it 312

By sheridan.ashley - 15/05/2010 06:27 - Australia

Today, my sister decided to wake me up by pumping handwash into my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 034

You deserved it 3 514

By quadropheniac - 09/06/2009 16:18 - United States

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128 485

You deserved it 8 103

By sniper foxeh - 29/07/2018 01:30

Today, my younger sister and I were camping when, during the middle of the night, she asked me if I could take her to the toilets as she was scared. I told her to go by herself or go behind the tent. Thirty seconds later, she peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 824

You deserved it 4 470

Whooped

By leah - 16/10/2019 22:00

Today, I was standing in the shower drying off when my sister came in the bathroom. She must have thought I was a burglar because she hit the shower curtain and punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 459

You deserved it 138

By future brain bleach addict - 02/05/2013 23:54 - Canada - Victoria

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 088

You deserved it 8 577

WhackTheJackal 22

Tuesday 21 October 2014 12:12

Oh god, hope she looked away when you finished. FYL

Smiley_70 22

Tuesday 21 October 2014 12:14

More like FML for your sister. You did the right thing going private.

Comments

eyeless_crap 3

Thursday 23 October 2014 16:55

Not your fault, no body should have to check if someone is hiding in the bathoom before you do your business, its your sisters fault for hiding there. props to you for being sanitary

Pyrithium 8

Friday 24 October 2014 4:50

Wincest?

nikmiester 7

Saturday 25 October 2014 11:28

Scarred for life eh?

aspe 1

Saturday 25 October 2014 21:30

You sure as hell are gonna check the closet next time.

diva239 8

Sunday 26 October 2014 15:31

Awkward! I hope she isn't to scarred!

neena2 3

Friday 31 October 2014 7:55

Remind me to never do that to my brother.

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Saturday 6 December 2014 13:59

That's why I always check everything in case my brother could be hiding in there.

WhoCouldIBe 11

Wednesday 21 January 2015 21:21

Follow up please. How old was she and you? Will she have serious problems in the future? Did she actually see you? Did you finish?

the_rad_brad47 18

Monday 27 April 2015 8:45

Wanking? Never heard of that one but really FML

Captain_Derpz 8

Monday 4 May 2015 5:28

Holy Shit! How old is she!?

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The Top

Today, my request to move apartments was once again denied. My next door neighbor’s constant marijuana smoke wafts over every day, and the woman upstairs is pregnant with her sixth child. It’s like a herd of elephants living above me. They won’t let me out of my lease unless I pay a huge amount. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 825

You deserved it 234

Today, I had to catch a bus to work, as my car had to be taken in yesterday. The bad drivers always upset my stomach with their instant stop/start driving style. I felt a burp coming on, but it turned out to be projectile vomit that filled my mask right up and poured down my shirt and pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 216

You deserved it 185

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 24 234

You deserved it 1 665

Today, in an attempt to keep my valuables safe, I snatched my PlayStation 4 controller from the hands of my 4-year-old nephew. Not knowing that it was connected, I ultimately yanked the PlayStation and the HD Flatscreen flat on their faces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 086

You deserved it 7 865

Today, I tutored a kid for two hours, for $25 an hour. When it came time for them to pay, my mother told the kid's parents that they could give me ten bucks for the whole thing. She does this a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 143

You deserved it 767

Today, things were getting steamy with my boyfriend. For once, I tried to be more vocal to turn him on. After five minutes, he says, "Could you stop making animal noises, I feel like I’m fucking in a farmyard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 609

You deserved it 101

Today, I was planning to propose to my girlfriend. I got out the ring and… she did the same. Coincidentally, she'd planned to propose to me, so we'd both got rings. Too bad our perfect moment was ruined by the bigot who called us “lezzers” and poured a pitcher of beer over both our heads. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 401

You deserved it 270

Today, my mom once again yelled at me for "driving erratically". She texts while driving 70 miles per hour on the highway, but apparently driving through a yellow light is "reckless". FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 270

You deserved it 704

Same thing different taste

Bad pranks are annoying

Whooped

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