Intimacy: Today, my ex texted me after more than a year of no communication....

By Anonymous - 12/12/2015 02:38

Today, my ex texted me after more than a year of no communication. He wanted to know if I was interested in having a threesome with him and his current fiancée. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 269

You deserved it 2 680

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Spare wheel

By Anonymous - 19/05/2020 14:00

Today, an ex of mine told me she wanted a threesome. This was great until I realised I wasn't included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 306

You deserved it 420

By Anonymous - 16/12/2009 06:15 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend, who I have been trying to get back together with, texted me. He asked me how life was going, he then asked me if I had the naked picture of him saved on my phone. I asked him why. He replied that he wanted to send it to his crush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 163

You deserved it 4 676

By emi - 03/04/2016 17:18 - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, the guy I've been seeing asked me to have a threesome. With his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 301

You deserved it 2 747

By Anonymous - 15/10/2010 17:15 - Nepal

Today, I texted my ex boyfriend that I still loved him. He texted back asking if this was some sort of booty call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 583

You deserved it 33 754

The old dog has learned new tricks

By Anonymous - 08/09/2022 10:00

Today, I had a threesome with my ex and his female friend. He went down on her almost immediately, which he never did in the 14 months that we dated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 1 194

By Laloose - 26/12/2008 07:53 - France

Today, I send a text message to my ex-boyfriend, who dumped me four months ago, telling him to come back. His answer: "feeling-wise I won't come back to you, but sexually, why not". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 016

You deserved it 28 283

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 25/03/2022 00:01

Today, my ex messaged me on Facebook, wanting to be friends with benefits. I’m married now, and he just found out his wife is expecting. She discovered the messages, and I’m now the “home wrecker.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099

You deserved it 101

Passing

By butchapparently - 10/08/2015 15:35

Today, I got a text from the guy I've been in love with for 3 years, saying, "So um, I've been wondering. Did you used to be a man?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 731

You deserved it 2 224

By donotbelieveinsecondchances - 02/03/2015 14:04 - Netherlands - Capelle Aan Den Ijssel

Today, my ex gave me a heartwarming speech about how much he wanted me back. After talking for hours and me finally wanting to get back together too, he started mentioning a date he has with a cute colleague. Conclusion: he wants to get back together, but still be able to fuck the entire world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 012

You deserved it 4 447

By mpetitto - 15/08/2016 00:44 - United States - Fairmont

Today, I received an "I miss you" text from my ex of 4 months, who I still love dearly and would give anything to get back together with. Yesterday, I slept with his best friend, convinced I'd never hear from my ex again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 706

You deserved it 18 601

klol101 11

Saturday 12 December 2015 20:22

Take a screenshot of that, spread it around and show the world what a douchebag he is....

Steve95401 49

Saturday 12 December 2015 20:04

What a douchebag!

Comments

deejflat 17

Tuesday 15 December 2015 19:28

Sounds like a keeper

wassup388 25

Friday 18 December 2015 23:22

Plot twist: the author said yes

Steve7910 6

Monday 4 January 2016 4:59

So...did you?

HKKillFeeDz 11

Tuesday 19 January 2016 20:48

Hell yeah!

PandaSage 10

Thursday 28 July 2016 9:12

So... What position were you in?

Keywords

Relatable Health Public freakouts Music Scams Geek Poopoo peepee Jewelry Awkward Bikes Cops Transportation Family Fight Kids Miscellaneous Mother in law AITA Social Media Love Relationship advice Art Work Students Sleep Birds Animals Noise Mental health Contraception

The Top

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 166

You deserved it 133

Today, no matter how well we tried to raise out daughter, things aren't looking too bright. I was present, I listened, and she told me her problems. My husband was always there for her too, no matter what. She works and studies but her role models consist of celebrities and girls who sell themselves on OnlyFans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 344

You deserved it 155

The Top

Today, I paid for someone else's pee so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 758

You deserved it 71 068

Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 183

You deserved it 3 630

Today, I happily announced to my parents that I'm pregnant. My dad later handed me a printout containing a list of nearby abortion clinics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 273

You deserved it 2 581

Today, at the age of 22, I found out that Wednesday has another D in it. Literally no one ever corrected me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 867

Today, my boyfriend came home, chugged a beer, and passed out in our bed without saying hello or goodnight to me. I've been on vacation for a week and was hoping to cuddle. But no, if I try to touch him, he hits me and growls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 141

You deserved it 6 933

Today, at the store, I heard a kid complaining about getting braces. While I was saying 'thank you' and 'bye' to the cashier, his grandma must've seen my slightly crooked teeth. She pointed and said, "Without them, your teeth will look bad like that man's!" Everyone around looked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 678

You deserved it 4 566