Love: Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I...

By schooyou101 - 17/11/2012 13:34 - United States - Prairie Village

Today, my crush finally agreed to spend the night with me. I told my parents to act normal for one night. Apparently, "normal" is strutting around naked and acting like a chicken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 115

You deserved it 6 140

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Same thing different taste

By Mojo_Jojo - 13/06/2009 11:01 - China

Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 007

You deserved it 6 678

By so_screwed - 25/09/2013 06:59 - United States - Salinas

Today, my one-night stand decided he wanted to meet my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 497

You deserved it 13 884

Sitcom moment

By Anonymous - 24/01/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my crush invited me to her house and I ended up meeting her dad. Then she suddenly had to dash off because her boyfriend, whom I had no idea existed, unexpectedly had free time so they were going on a last minute date, which left me awkwardly sat there in the kitchen with her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 104

Sibling rivalry

By Anonymous - 14/07/2023 00:02 - Switzerland - Zollikerberg

Today, I finally had an opportunity to flirt with the guy I have a crush on. We danced together all night and everything was going well… too well apparently, because out of nowhere, he kissed my sister, who knew about my crush on him but still kissed him back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 118

By maddiee. - 21/10/2010 15:20 - Indonesia

Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 273

You deserved it 7 325

By jswag2004 - 11/12/2019 01:00 - United States - Elgin

Today, I finally got the guts to ask out my crush. She said yes and I was really happy. Then I woke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 879

You deserved it 359

Method acting

By Anonymous - 09/02/2013 05:08 - United Kingdom - Frome

Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 637

You deserved it 45 052

By xXxtwilightLUV95xXx - 08/03/2010 15:14 - United States

Today, I woke up to the most awkward breakfast of my life. Apparently, last night after taking my sleeping pill, I went into my mom's room and started spilling secrets left and right. Secrets about my current crush, the people I've hooked up with, and how when I say I'm going over to my friend Beth's house, I'm really seeing a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 446

You deserved it 34 786

By no more mr nice guy - 27/12/2016 07:32

Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 029

You deserved it 957

Misunderstood

By Lonely - 24/07/2011 17:02 - United States

Today, I went out for coffee with my sister and my crush. I spent the majority of the date flirting with my crush, and when he dropped us off at home, I told him I had fun on our date. He looked at me surprised and said he'd thought I'd tagged along on his date with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 572

You deserved it 9 464

alissa_roar 6

Saturday 17 November 2012 19:44

Your parents allow random crushes of yours to spend the night at their house? I'm guessing you're an adult living in your parents' house.

saIty 17

Saturday 17 November 2012 19:39

Wearing clothes and acting like a normal person is too mainstream.

Comments

randybryant799 20

Monday 10 January 2022 0:54

Why is he sleeping over with your parents there?

randybryant799 20

Saturday 29 January 2022 8:41

Wait. Your parents let some guy you're crushing on spend the night? eewww

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The Top

Today, I had a tooth pulled. An hour or so later, I removed the gauze from my mouth, because I thought the bleeding had stopped. I got on my laptop. A few minutes later I looked down, to see that I had drooled blood all over the keyboard, and didn't know because my mouth was numb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 874

You deserved it 33 942

Today, my brother is staying over for a while. I thought I was prepared for this, but I totally forgot that he is inexplicably prone to having random nosebleeds. He's going through my Kleenex faster than a horny teenage boy left alone in his room. Time to hoard Kleenex like how people hoarded toilet paper in 2020. FML

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You deserved it 81

The Top

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You deserved it 3 486

Today, I asked my husband if he wanted to visit my parents for Thanksgiving. He choked on his own spit to avoid answering the question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 329

You deserved it 1 526

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I agree, your life sucks 1 286

You deserved it 394

Today, I was at work at Walmart, casually walking in the middle of the store, when my foot caught on something, so I went flying forward and yelled, being caught off guard, to the point I had to pretend I was running for 3 seconds, then someone blocked my path so I suddenly had to stop. Everyone was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 580

You deserved it 304

Today, I decided to do a load of laundry. Two minutes into the cycle, I realized that I left my iPod in my sweatpants pocket. The washing machine door locks automatically and cannot be opened until the 40-minute cycle is up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 358

You deserved it 52 314

Today, I was packing up to move when I decided to take a break. I went to get some water from the sink when a bug fell into my cup. Needless to say, I'm glad I'm moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 85