Intimacy: Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he... - FML

By Patrick R - 09/06/2011 16:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he owes me. In the memo line, he wrote "for swallowing". Now I have to go cash it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 153

You deserved it 6 996

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/09/2012 13:46 - United States

Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 553

You deserved it 4 111

By Anonymous - 11/07/2012 05:29 - United States - Dallas

Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 008

You deserved it 9 868

What?

By Patrick - 29/10/2020 03:08 - Trinidad and Tobago - Couva

Today, my coworker got a raise by making our boss give me a pay cut for doing his job while he was slacking off. As we were heading home for the day, he found $100. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 217

You deserved it 90

Drunken antics

By qx5 - 08/01/2011 22:05 - Canada

Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 522

You deserved it 58 077

By Elmoo - 01/06/2012 01:20 - Netherlands

Today, I was at work when a customer, who was going to pay for her groceries, started sorting through her money. She put some coins in her mouth, seemed to suck on them for a while, and then gave them to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 566

You deserved it 1 943

Seize the means of production

By vikts - 29/05/2012 17:52 - Luxembourg - Olm

Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 337

You deserved it 1 952

By Anonymous - 13/05/2014 19:23 - Canada - Charlottetown

Today, everyone at the office was finally presented with the bonuses our boss had promised to pay us by the end of last year. Turns out he was never authorized to promise any such thing, so he ended up just giving us signed "thank you" letters instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 902

You deserved it 3 419

All in a day's work

By Steve-noh - 10/08/2018 23:30

Today, at my job as a waiter I sharted myself while taking an order. They tipped me $20 and wrote "for new underwear" on the receipt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 153

You deserved it 589

The customer is sometimes devious

By dontgivemechecks - 16/03/2020 14:00

Today, I found out that I accidentally returned a customer her $147 check she had written out to pay for her groceries and receive cash back. The lady got free groceries and money, and I'm now losing my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 265

You deserved it 669

By A. - 15/04/2009 07:48 - Canada

Today, after two weeks of living on plain pasta, I finally got my paycheck and was excited that I'd get real food, and ride the subway instead of exhausting my malnourished body with the two-hour walk to work. My surname was misspelt on the check; the bank is holding it for ten days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 292

You deserved it 4 102

Next

Top comments

Idonebeenhad 17

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:27

How'd it taste?

mattmadden 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:10

A brain...

Comments

xrudeboyrock 29

Friday 10 June 2011 0:02

HA. That's funny. I'm sure the teller won't even bother to read it, and I doubt they'll comment if they do. Just go to a bank you never go to, and you don't have to see them again!

xk75 4

Friday 10 June 2011 0:05

whatever just cross it out and deposit it at the ATM or drive through. lame fml. f your coworker's life for still using a checkbook for anything besides rent.

ThisRandomChild 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:09

Its even more awkward cause ur a guy O.O

TheresNoEffingwa 7

Friday 10 June 2011 0:12

that guy is a winner

omg_a_BALLOON 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:14

Was it for swallowing a staple?

anakaren_831 1

Friday 10 June 2011 0:23

I really love when people reference other FMLs :)

MissFukMyLuck 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:22

what this guy said! go to a male banker. they won't hate, you will be looked upon in admiration

zarden 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:23

people still write cheques?!

SpeakingMyMind 0

Friday 10 June 2011 4:06

No, but people still write 'checks.'

scrapmetal58 9

Friday 10 June 2011 4:51

^ Idiot.

youshitme 9

Friday 10 June 2011 8:06

Cheque is the correct spelling of the word, 'check' is a bastardisation of the correct English spelling. if you're thinking of writing that 'bastardisation' should be written as 'bastardization', you'd also be incorrect, 'bastardization' is a bastardisation of 'bastardisation'.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Friday 10 June 2011 21:13

143: You're niggling there. "Check" and the -ize suffix have both gained their legitimacy in the US through common usage. Since this website has an international membership, both are correct here. Language evolves. Deal with it.

ShakeMeDown 12

Monday 13 June 2011 6:52

in America we speak American!

GEFStryker 29

Monday 13 June 2011 7:22

In America you elected Bush two terms in a row. Yea, it was THAT stupid that we foreigners can still joke about it. So off with your American ways, ya fruity nutter.

jennuh 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 8:09

Smart guys are hottt:)

DriizztD 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:25

love it. id go cash it and hand him back the cash. 100 points for effort and another 100 for just pure smarts. this made my day OP.

DriizztD 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:25

love it. id go cash it and hand him back the cash. 100 points for effort and another 100 for just pure smarts. this made my day OP.

gingerlr 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:27

your co-worker is a legend

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Keywords

Embarrassing Awkward Cars Transportation Babysitter Relatable Family Kids Money Thief Depression Health Mental health Wanker Work Bodyshaming Love Vacation Annoying Students Parenting Intimacy AITA First Dates Singing Cats Animals Weddings Public freakouts Cops

The Top

Today, I found out that I didn't get a job because I failed the psychological analysis. It told me to answer each question and tell the truth. So I did. I asked my friend, who got the job, if she told the truth. She said no. Apparently you have to lie in order to get a job. Sorry for being honest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 506

You deserved it 7 861

Today, after work, I was saying goodbye to my last remaining friend I worked with because she was going to be leaving for college. My manager saw me talking and made me clock back in and work, because, "If you have time to talk, you have time to work." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 643

You deserved it 1 249

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 385

You deserved it 78

Today, I went downtown with my friends. A group of guys came up to us and started hitting on everyone except me. Then one of them said, "Do you girls hang out with her to make yourselves look better?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 843

You deserved it 3 856

Today, army recruiters came to my school and set up some punching bags to attract potential recruits. I gave it a shot, managing to set the highest score at my school and fracture my wrist at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 937

You deserved it 7 028

Today, I wrote a poem for this guy I am falling for. Before telling him that I wrote it, he read it and then laughed at how "corny and stupid" it was because he would "never date someone who could come up with something that lame." The poem was about how vulnerable he makes me feel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 314

You deserved it 16 522

Today, while making a move in a board game that helped my boyfriend win, he got all excited and said "I love you, babe." I smiled until I realized this was the first time he told me that other than when he wants a blow-job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 856

You deserved it 6 304

Today, I received an e-mail telling me the job offer I got last week was rescinded. Apparently, the memes I share on my Instagram page are "tasteless" and don’t fit the company’s values. I forgot my profile is public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 1 850