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C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER! I've always wanted to do that. Now I can check that off my list. Let's see, what's my next goal? It say's here "Get first comment on an FML". I'll do it! Dun dun dunnnn!

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Remember what happened the last time you did that, Ling-Ling? They say you still can't sit down properly, and you know what, maybe that's for the best :D

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I believe that "King-a-Ling" got too into it, and actually punctured his fallopian tubes. Ah well, there is always the last option on your list: making sandwiches.

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It's okay. I'm used to it! Thanks to all the roofies that were slipped into my drinks! Let's see the list of people that spiked my drink. 1) KaySL 2) KaySL 3) KaySL 4) KaySL 5) KaySL Hmm...I think I see a pattern...

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KingDingALing, your obsession with Kay is getting a little out of hand. He has only said a few words to you, but your brain tricks you into thinking you have some sort of relationship with him. He didn't spike your drinks, he didn't molest you.. I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you are sick. You need to schedule an appointment with a doctor and/or shrink right away. I recommend DocBastard.

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I appreciate my lawyer's attempt to defuse the situation, but I feel I have to state that I am indeed a sick sex offender who's been routinely spiking LingLing's drinks and ruining the hell out of his luscious ass. I can't be judged for that.

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I'm guilty as fuck, judge, even guiltier than DocBastard every time he stands in for the OBGYN chick. Please execute me, sir. Painfully.

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To be fair, I also perv on anyone with the power to satisfy my frankly sick desire to be used, abused, discarded, and made an example of. The being executed in cold blood part is just a side fetish.

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Of course he did KDaL. But you can't expect me to admit that, I am after all his lawyer. It is almost the same as Kay's sick obsession with Sirin, in fact that is why I'm warning you. As his lawyer, I've spent a lot of time with him and let me tell you: he is one messed up crackhead.

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And a good lawyer you are, Doortje. That is why I have some horrible news.... Kay, I will no longer be stalking you. I'm moving on. I found someone else to stalk. I will now stalk Doortje. I have a sick obsession with her.

Okay, so your boyfriend is shallow. If it bothers you that much, then try to talk with him & work through it together. Or you could just take the easy way out & dump him as I'm sure plenty of other people will advise for you to do so.

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