Health: Today, my aunt had to smuggle me some regular toothpaste. Why?...

By teeth - 10/08/2011 17:00 - United States

Today, my aunt had to smuggle me some regular toothpaste. Why? My mom isn't letting anyone in our house use anything but "Coral Paste." There are actually lumps of coral in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 437

You deserved it 2 826

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Same thing different taste

WTF Mom?

By Username - 25/11/2012 23:36 - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, I caught my mother trying to switch my contraceptive pill for Tic Tacs. I don't know what's worse - how far she will go to have a grandchild, or that she thought I wouldn't notice that my birth control left me with minty fresh breath. FML

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By Anonymous - 04/05/2023 03:00

Today, I snuck into my aunt's house while she was working to raid her pantry, like I do most days. Excited for a snack cake, I went to the pantry. Apparently she'd found out, because there was a lock on it. FML

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Hygiene 101

By Anonymous - 08/06/2019 18:00

Today, my mother refused to talk to me because I wouldn't let her use my deodorant stick. FML

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You deserved it 277

By nothing is sacred - 23/02/2017 12:00 - United States - Reynoldsburg

Today, I caught my mom using my toothbrush and washcloth again, despite her having both her own bathroom and supplies. I asked her to please not use mine, to which she called me an ungrateful bitch. My dad agreed. Yet they wonder why I've been desperately saving money to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 537

You deserved it 495

By Poor Student - 05/12/2011 22:30 - Canada

Today, my mother "borrowed" money from my stash to help pay for her vacation to the Dominican Republic. The same trip I'm not allowed to go on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 452

You deserved it 2 573

By BiteMe - 30/08/2016 23:29 - United States - Upper Marlboro

Today, my dentist told me I have a cavity and blamed it on the "subpar" toothpaste I've been using - the same toothpaste he recommended six months ago at my last appointment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 281

You deserved it 1 189

#1 Mom

By whoopsboutthecap - 15/11/2011 12:51 - United States

Today, my mom called me crazy and told me she wanted to put me in a mental hospital. She did this after repeatedly hitting me with a shoe. Why? Because I forgot to put the cap back on the toothpaste. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 251

You deserved it 3 772

Dad Jokes, part 36646

By JackSoda - 26/03/2020 17:01

Today, my dad brought the double barrel shotgun to my room, gave me his hat and said, "It's all about survival now. At any cost, Coral." He keeps calling me Coral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 465

You deserved it 222

By ThaBoss12 - 01/11/2014 22:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 758

You deserved it 3 524

By Anonymous - 13/05/2013 05:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 012

You deserved it 5 243

bubble25_fml 5

Wednesday 10 August 2011 22:07

don't know if I should trust u, your fml sounds a bit fishy...

Blue87 4

Wednesday 10 August 2011 22:07

ewww

Comments

Jemibub 4

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:03

Considering most toothpaste is made of microscopic sea creatures' shells, I see no problem with coral.

15bthwreatt 2

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:08

This is the nerdiest conversation going on ever!!!!!

Feklfekl2222 32

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:09

Ok then. That was just me guessing using what little I know about coral and teeth

hyden121 2

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:27

Look at the bright side. Ancient Egyptians used to use sand and cat urine (among other things). Thank you Discovery Channel...

kelinpro 1

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:27

Plankton skeletons are in all toothpaste. I feel like coral and plankton are on the same level.

skyeyez9 24

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:34

Sounds perfect, if you're looking to rub all the enamel off of your teeth. Fyl

crimsonbaby11 0

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:38

Wow.

XxDancerGirlxX 17

Thursday 11 August 2011 1:44

Coral Paste huh? Sounds like it would cut your mouth up.

MerrikBarbarian 9

Thursday 11 August 2011 2:32

this makes me sad from an environmental perspective. many corals ate endangered. they should not be used in any thing :/

skylance87 8

Thursday 11 August 2011 2:38

Holy crap this ***** real but i dont think its real coral but researched it its gritty tooth paste sounds fun... Not

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