Miscellaneous: Today, it's my birthday. The only "happy birthday"s I got were...

By carboncoach - 13/12/2013 17:24 - Egypt

Today, it's my birthday. The only "happy birthday"s I got were from my mom, her Facebook account, and the Facebook account she made for her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 797

You deserved it 3 393

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Same thing different taste

By Birthday girl - 06/01/2013 05:59 - United States - Wahpeton

Today, was my birthday. Today was also the day that my mom's cat died four years ago. She was too busy crying and looking at old photos of her beloved cat to even wish me a happy birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 267

You deserved it 2 393

Alexa, play "Unhappy Birthday" by The Smiths

By Anonymous - 25/04/2022 04:00 - United States - Brookline

Today, it was my birthday. Nobody said anything, not even my Facebook friends, who probably got a notification about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 155

By Anonymous - 18/08/2019 16:00 - United Kingdom - Thornbury

Today, the only "Happy birthday!" I got was from the cake I bought for myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 876

You deserved it 152

Generic Happy Birthday gif

By Anonymous - 26/06/2021 14:15 - United States

Today, I'm still trying not to cry. Yesterday was by birthday. I got an email from my dad with three words, "Happy Birthday (nickname)". I got a Facebook post from my mother. No card. No phone call. No gift. I have become nothing more than a Facebook friend to my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 628

You deserved it 222

Friends and family

By Anonymous - 19/08/2021 09:59

Today, it was my birthday. None of my family members wished me a happy birthday and neither did the 1,000+ "friends" I have on Facebook either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 841

You deserved it 340

Mr Whiskers takes priority

By Anonymous - 07/12/2021 16:58

Today, my daughter forgot my birthday. When I asked her, she said she'd remembered my birthday, but was too busy at work to acknowledge it. However, she did have time to post a message on Facebook, wishing a happy birthday to her cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 940

You deserved it 124

By garfwebba - 03/01/2010 01:17 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend didn't get me a present. He did, however, get me a card from our cat. He signed it "Have a purrrrfect birthday." Then he left to go to work. I was alone all day long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 475

You deserved it 6 618

By birthdaygirl - 16/04/2014 17:24 - United States - San Francisco

Today, it's my birthday. The only people who wished me a happy birthday were the ones who saw the "birthday boy" poster my sister plastered around school, which included a photo of me as a kid dressed up as a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 023

You deserved it 4 207

By Jake Whitte - 06/06/2011 13:50 - United States

Today, I changed the date of my birthday to today on Facebook to see how many people actually know my birthday. My mom wished me a happy birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 661

You deserved it 15 748

By Micawber - 31/01/2011 13:55 - Denmark

Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 413

You deserved it 3 466

Nyx_fml 23

Saturday 14 December 2013 2:20

Did the kitten say, "Have a purrfect birthday!"? So many cat puns could have been made.

DocBastard 38

Saturday 14 December 2013 2:29

And now you'll get 184 more from random FML users who don't actually give a **** about you but want to look like nice people. Happy ******* birthday.

Comments

JoseIsAdork 31

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:22

happy birthday, op! hope the rest of your day is better, try to enjoy yourself :)

im_dusty 1

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:23

well it's probably because it's Friday the 13th and happy birthday

ImaginaryPerson 21

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:24

Happy Birthday!

thebomb553 5

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:36

Happy Birthday!

thebestdancerz 13

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:38

Happy Birthday!

edanielleh 21

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:39

Sorry op, that sucks! At least you know at least someone cares

LaughingLizard 4

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:39

Happy birthday!!

crazydanilo 13

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:40

Happy birthday OP )))

radigen 11

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:50

Happy birthday

Tiber_fml 12

Saturday 14 December 2013 4:54

Happy Birthday

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my dad, who never supported us growing up, and who calls once a month to collect his monthly living expenses, gave me an ultimatum: either buy him a plane ticket so that he can come live with me forever (he's a raging alcoholic) OR to send him $4,500 US Dollars (which where he lives is someone's 6 month salary). FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 107

Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 458

You deserved it 2 907

The Top

Today, when I went to pick up my daughter from preschool, I found out she'd "accidentally" tried to flush her clothes down the toilet while going to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 462

You deserved it 3 456

Today, my wife is out of town on business. So I got drunk. Really drunk. Felt like swimming around midnight (we live in Arizona). Jumped in the pool… and forget how to swim. Too uncoordinated, I almost drowned. Then I threw up in the pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 2 458

Today, my mother bitched me out for not finishing my laundry. I'm a 37-year-old mother of three. She rents my basement suite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 950

You deserved it 2 669

Today, my parents asked if I wanted to go to military school so I said, "Yeah, that would be awesome," thinking it was a joke. They weren't joking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 247

You deserved it 44 019

Today, I was giving my wife a massage. That led to some very intense and passionate love making, and she told me that has been the best sex we’ve had. Next thing I know, she's upset and yelling at me about how massages always lead to sex. She was asking for it. Literally. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 770

You deserved it 163

Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 734

You deserved it 4 577

Same thing different taste

Alexa, play "Unhappy Birthday" by The Smiths

Generic Happy Birthday gif

Friends and family

Mr Whiskers takes priority

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