Intimacy: Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same...

By Anonymous - 21/11/2010 08:01 - Mexico

Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 398

You deserved it 65 816

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Same thing different taste

By ass slap - 11/08/2013 15:35 - United States - Broomall

Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she was going to get me back. She slapped my ass later that night unexpectedly while I was holding in a huge fart... It came out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 213

You deserved it 24 811

Hanging

By James - 31/07/2011 04:20 - United States

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 389

You deserved it 17 989

By Anonymous - 11/11/2014 15:37 - United States

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 348

You deserved it 6 270

By civicman - 27/09/2009 02:19 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 672

You deserved it 66 211

By Anonymous - 21/01/2012 22:38 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were hugging in the hall after school. This annoying kid I know walked by, and yelled, "Tiny penis!" at me. My girlfriend responded, "Yep." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 415

You deserved it 5 039

By Something I said? - 05/11/2013 15:26 - United States - Bronx

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 049

You deserved it 59 049

By undoable - 08/09/2010 23:14 - United States

Today, I was doing it with my girlfriend. Trying to be sexy, I moaned her name. She replied, "What?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 183

You deserved it 9 755

I am clumsy!

By Anonymous - 16/01/2020 18:00

Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 395

You deserved it 3 164

By Anonymous - 17/07/2011 08:43 - United States

Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 360

You deserved it 22 610

Knight

By Racked - 01/03/2016 18:00 - United States - Corpus Christi

Today, I walked my girlfriend home. As I kissed her goodbye, I heard a high-pitched scream and turned just in time to see her little brother charge head-first into my nuts. All because I kissed her on the cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 218

You deserved it 1 920

canadian_ftw 8

Sunday 21 November 2010 16:29

whenever an FML says 'I tried to be funny...' it's like an instant YDI.

cufaoil 11

Sunday 21 November 2010 16:22

well, you were acting like a dick, OP

Comments

jmcr 27

Wednesday 5 September 2012 2:52

Haha good gf that's great yo so had that coming

ellezmarie 3

Wednesday 19 September 2012 15:29

Omg that proper sad OP, my boyfriend does that to me every time he does it I slap him harder and harder you should grow up a little!

slenderman1234 2

Monday 15 October 2012 4:46

Like a boss

Fang713 28

Wednesday 10 July 2013 6:47

My boyfriend does that to me. ;-;

vaughnh1998 4

Thursday 22 May 2014 23:16

I hated when my ex did that. Especially in public

reggie_k_dwight 16

Tuesday 16 September 2014 13:47

I don't even realize why this is an FML. My girlfriend and I do stuff like this all the time…

mourines 0

Sunday 15 November 2015 10:49

As long as it's not at a stupid time I don't see what the big deal is. My boyfriend does that, it's not a big deal. Your chick needs to lighten the **** up

nevergonnaGivUup 8

Friday 27 November 2015 15:45

He touched her boobs he didn't slap them. Our dicks are way more sensitive. If she didn't slap it I'm sure he'd be fine with it but clearly women love to exaggerate.