Miscellaneous: Today, I was running late and couldn't find my purse anywhere.... - FML

By PEGASISTER FOR LIIIIIIIIFFFFFEEEEE!!!!! - 08/06/2012 21:30 - Mexico

Today, I was running late and couldn't find my purse anywhere. My sleep-deprived brain came up with the brilliant idea of trying to phone it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 455

You deserved it 5 053

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/03/2013 07:02 - United States - San Jose

Today, after working out at the gym, I went to grab my bag, and realized that my phone was missing. Panicking, I reached into my pocket, pulled out my phone, and dialed my mom's number to tell her I'd lost it. It took me until the last ring to realize what I was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 961

You deserved it 41 446

On the run

By Allen - 05/01/2010 06:40 - France

Today, I was in a hurry to catch a plane. I got halfway to the airport when I realized I'd forgotten my phone. I drove back to the house and searched for it. I finally gave up and returned to the airport, only to find that I was 10 minutes late for my plane. Just then, my pocket vibrated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 922

You deserved it 40 507

By Anonymous - 08/10/2011 15:54 - United States

Today, I spent about 10 minutes searching frantically for my cell phone, while holding it up to my ear and talking to my friend about my plans tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 835

You deserved it 42 143

By Anonymous - 26/08/2019 14:00

Today, I went through my purse to see where my keys were. I found my house keys, but not my car keys, so I freaked out. When I remembered that I was driving, I felt stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 1 751

By nerderer - 30/04/2015 18:48 - United States - Duluth

Today, after frantically searching my house and office and calling every place I'd visited in the last 24 hours, I finally found my phone in my fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 848

You deserved it 6 837

By Caitlin - 10/06/2010 00:46 - United States

Today, I had to drive 300 miles to a town where I thought I'd forgotten my purse the night before. When I got to the hotel I had been staying at, I found out it was actually in the trunk of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 302

You deserved it 45 764

By mrs14 - 11/09/2012 02:04 - United States

Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 470

You deserved it 31 206

By Anonymous - 12/07/2012 16:04 - United States - Millers Tavern

Today, I was running late for an important job interview because I couldn't find my keys. I place the keys on my kitchen counter every day to prevent exactly this type of situation. After few minutes and missing my interview, I finally found my keys, in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 356

You deserved it 32 122

ETA? No idea!

By Anonymous - 31/03/2023 02:00

Today, I was running late for an important meeting and couldn't find my car keys. After searching around for way too long, I finally realised where they were - in the pocket of the pants I'd worn the day before, which were now spinning around in the now-unstoppable, two-hour washing machine cycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 391

By life_suxxx - 06/12/2009 07:43 - United States

Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. Several hours later I realize that I can't find my wallet. After looking all over my house and then the store parking lot, I had my credit cards cancelled. On the drive home, I feel something under me. It was my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 324

You deserved it 33 541

Next

Top comments

LilBobby 0

Saturday 9 June 2012 2:32

Is that the new iPurse?

tswizz 13

Saturday 9 June 2012 2:29

Did you get through?

Comments

Aspen_Grace33 27

Saturday 9 June 2012 3:44

I'm dying to know, did it answer?!?!

mrtjawesome 14

Saturday 9 June 2012 3:54

in soviet russia, purse call you!

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 9 June 2012 7:06

In Soviet Russia your comment is still stupid.

NYCZO 0

Saturday 9 June 2012 3:55

Wonderful idea!

AwsumShyGuy 12

Saturday 9 June 2012 4:01

Sorry about the purse and the lack of sleep, but brohoof?

angela3825 1

Saturday 9 June 2012 4:16

One time I was so sleep deprived that I tried to brush my teeth with a marker and hand soap...

Briiyahh 7

Saturday 9 June 2012 4:24

Smart

ElricMustang 23

Saturday 9 June 2012 4:43

13: You go do that; tell us how that works out for you... 30: I just imagined Dory's voice saying that lol because of your icon xD

stary1722 6

Saturday 9 June 2012 4:43

That is an awesome idea... Make a purse that you can call and find? Never lose it again! :D

gloria89108 1

Saturday 9 June 2012 4:57

I sware I have done the same thing I have also stood out side my front door pushing the button to open the car ,pointing it at the front door !!! Blond moment

MyEpicFail 9

Saturday 9 June 2012 5:16

OP: *picks up the phone* Hello, purse.. where the hell are you? I've been looking everywhere for you... you're where? o_o ...under the couch?... Wait ill check... nope not there. =/

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The Top

Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 837

You deserved it 30 761

Today, my step-dad was talking about how he was raised in Las Vegas, telling stories about him and his buddies, until he stopped, looked right at my mom and said, "Find her, feed her, f*ck her, forget her. But I never forgot your mom, that's how I stole her from your dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 381

You deserved it 4 153

The Top

Today, my phone started ringing in the other room. I ran to go pick it up, tripped over my coffee table which gashed my leg, and knocked over my brand new 50" LCD TV, which broke over my head. Turns out it was a wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 432

You deserved it 15 292

Today, I got an alert from Facebook that it was my very popular and attractive classmate's birthday. I decided to be sweet and write "Happy birthday" on her wall, only to notice it wasn't there a few minutes later. I rewrote it again and it disappeared. After three attempts, I took the hint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 680

You deserved it 4 708

Today, while I was showering, my brother thought it would be funny to burst through the door pretending he was a burglar. Panicked, I went to grab the soap bar as a weapon, slipped, fell, and hit my head on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 742

You deserved it 5 152

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 778

You deserved it 2 972

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my dorm room. He was naked and was peeing into my water bottle. He kept asking for Chris. I have no idea who Chris is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 972

You deserved it 3 451

Today, a child was choking in the store I work at. He was alone in the aisle, so I started the Heimlich without his parents' permission. After dislodging what was caught, his mother turned the corner and went screaming to my manager for touching her kid. I got a write up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 610

You deserved it 3 421