Transportation: Today, I was riding my motorcycle when a guy cut me off at a... - FML

By Knaxer - 12/12/2015 17:22 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, I was riding my motorcycle when a guy cut me off at a light. I honked and swore at him when a bug flew into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 955

You deserved it 6 576

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Same thing different taste

By jelrid - 13/07/2016 04:38 - United States - Holt

Today, my worst fears were realized as an insect pinged off the back of my mouth while I was singing along to the radio on my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 921

You deserved it 3 953

By lumacsp - 08/10/2009 12:22 - United States

Today, I stopped at the light when someone crashed on to my motorcycle making me fall. The guy claimed it was my fault because I stopped too fast. I got really mad, so I attempted to spit on his face and was ready to start a fight when I noticed that I forgot to lift the helmet shield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 283

You deserved it 52 405

By Anonymous - 17/05/2009 05:17 - United States

Today, I was on a bike ride when a bug flew into my eye. Not wanting to stop, I figured I would just keep that eye closed until I could cry it out. Five seconds later, a bug flew into my other eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 958

You deserved it 8 687

By hahahah111 - 25/05/2009 07:43 - United States

Today, my mom was driving me somewhere. As we were driving she got mad at a motorcycle driver telling to "get the fuck off the road." In response, the driver decided to spit into my open window. His spit landed on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 771

You deserved it 4 270

Protein

By Nearly Crashed - 27/05/2013 13:42 - United States - Lake Hiawatha

Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 459

You deserved it 9 103

Take that

By Anonymous - 30/07/2009 00:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was riding my motorcycle when I saw my cheating ex-wife walking down the road. Out of anger, I spat my gum at her. I forgot that my helmet's visor was still down, so when I spat, the gum stuck against it. I was temporarily blinded and I crashed into some bushes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 147

You deserved it 77 685

By Brandon Butler - 04/03/2011 09:22

Today, I was riding my motorcycle on the highway and wearing all of my gear - boots, gloves, jacket, and full-face helmet. Somehow a bee found the only spot not covered on my body and stung my neck. I'm allergic to bees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 630

You deserved it 2 994

By AmberKCole - 08/07/2009 18:45 - United States

Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashed my lights and honked. I floored it and passed the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flipped off drove by honked and waved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 545

You deserved it 100 518

By yuck - 09/12/2018 03:30 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was out riding and a seagull pissed on me. It got in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 621

You deserved it 237

By apparentlyawomanbeater - 20/04/2012 21:48 - Switzerland - Cadempino

Today, I was on the bus during rush hour. A fly started buzzing around my head, and I swatted at it, at the exact moment the woman beside me decided to get out of her seat and put her face straight in the path of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 021

You deserved it 3 101

Next

Top comments

Hammer1722 19

Sunday 13 December 2015 12:47

Look on the bright side OP, you didn't crash!

VoldooPed 20

Sunday 13 December 2015 12:48

Taste good?

Comments

Skycop_S 23

Sunday 13 December 2015 18:22

I have a phobia of creepy looking insects, like crane flys. This makes me cringe. YDI for not wearing a helmet

yourwifelovesme 25

Sunday 13 December 2015 19:26

Jesus is watching

rabid_otaku 29

Sunday 13 December 2015 20:08

Helmets

apcsox 18

Sunday 13 December 2015 20:35

As a motorcycle ride, I feel your pain. So many people are so ******* ignorant of their surroundings while driver and give zero ***** to look for anything. Ride safely.

malik5250 13

Sunday 13 December 2015 22:48

Motorcycles have horns?

IIIIRowdy 5

Monday 14 December 2015 17:32

Yes, they do

Super_Asian_Boy 12

Monday 14 December 2015 1:51

Where's your helmet?

Berber260 14

Monday 14 December 2015 2:10

Bon appétit

remometol 16

Monday 14 December 2015 2:53

Why cuss? This is just karma

YFOS_fml 17

Monday 14 December 2015 4:57

Maybe you'll listen next time when mum says if you don't have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.

momac86 17

Monday 14 December 2015 9:22

Better than washing your mouth out with soap

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Cops Neighbours Stressed out Scary Health Parents Transportation Cars Embarrassing Work First Dates LGBTQIA+ Love My ex Facebook Social Media Sex Intimacy Virginity School Painful Dating Tinder Awkward AITA Coworkers Jealousy Skincare

The Top

Today, to spice things up a bit, my wife and I were having sex in our kitchen. She was up on the counter and I moved her over to get in a better position. The stove was still hot from dinner, so now my wife has a burn that looks like a double rainbow on her ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 102

You deserved it 36 910

Today, I was ready to get intimate with my husband 7 months after giving birth to our son. He always made excuses as to why he couldn’t. Our marriage was on the rocks because of this, so when I sat him down to talk he admitted that to save this marriage I need to get a “tummy tuck” and a “breast lift.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 060

You deserved it 233

The Top

Today, I woke up to my drunk mom trying to pee in the dresser drawer of our hotel, with my clothes in it. I woke up right in time to yell at her. Pants down and all. She started denying there were even clothes in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 801

You deserved it 116

Today, I took a girl to a sushi restaurant for our first date. She insisted she's had sushi before, but I had to watch her struggle with the chopsticks for a few minutes before mercifully asking the waitress for a fork. She then ate a fork full of wasabi, thinking it was guacamole. I think there won't be a second date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 350

You deserved it 3 505

Today, I found out that my violent ex has moved to my country for the sole purpose of tracking me down. I know this because my former boss called and told me she gave him my address. She loves the idea of us getting back together because, "You're such a cute couple!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 641

You deserved it 1 799

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm boring and never go to the bar with him. He knows I'm a recovering alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 317

You deserved it 2 226

Today, I pretended to be sleeping when my dad came to check on me. I’m not talking to him. Why? Because my mom died in January and he already has a girlfriend he says he wants to marry, she's going to be my step-mom. I’m 31. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 375

Today, I had to pee during a supervised lockdown. I asked my teacher to take me since we couldn't be in the halls alone. Since class was going, she couldn't take me. Much to my dismay, she sent a school-wide email asking for someone to take me to pee. Six teachers took me, including my principal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 487

You deserved it 5 246