Animals: Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring,...

By Scared - 05/06/2012 00:54 - United States - Arlington

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 654

You deserved it 3 391

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Same thing different taste

By whymomwhy - 11/07/2015 17:20 - United States - Salem

Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 341

You deserved it 2 880

By Anonymous - 14/08/2011 19:32 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom ranting on about what a useless bitch I am. She was talking to my cat. It's not the first time this has happened, either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 505

You deserved it 3 992

By wekasdjkasldasdkasdzcawqe - 07/08/2013 20:55 - Sweden

Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 076

You deserved it 5 690

By izu - 16/09/2011 05:40 - United States

Today, my mom decided to only speak to me through our pet cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 204

You deserved it 2 743

By Tragic - 27/04/2009 21:50 - United States

Today, I heard my mom ask "Are you okay?" I opened my mouth to tell her about how I've been feeling suicidal lately. At that second, I realized she was talking to my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 269

You deserved it 6 830

By Aled - 17/02/2011 16:33 - United Kingdom

Today, I found my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 830

You deserved it 3 331

By seriously - 24/05/2013 07:04 - United States

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 737

You deserved it 4 566

Every day is Caturday

By Anonymous - 16/11/2012 00:36 - United States - Panama City

Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 524

You deserved it 1 832

By cat co-parent - 03/01/2015 00:11 - Australia

Today, my mum sat me down for a serious talk about not being home enough - not because she misses me, but because the family cat needs more stability in her life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 604

You deserved it 2 749

By Noname - 04/02/2009 11:23 - Canada

Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 092

You deserved it 38 824

the_anti_hipster 7

Tuesday 5 June 2012 8:56

Sounds like your mom's off her meds again...

StoryOfTheYear 14

Tuesday 5 June 2012 8:57

Meanwhile in the Evil household.

Comments

fabcade 14

Tuesday 5 June 2012 21:24

I make that joke with my roomy because I actually have an evil cat

billji 0

Tuesday 5 June 2012 21:47

Women.. nuff said.

McAninch35 9

Wednesday 6 June 2012 1:23

Thanks, Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

NorthernLights96 5

Wednesday 6 June 2012 2:24

So I am not the only one who plots world domination with a cat... Good to know.

simonepedretti 7

Wednesday 6 June 2012 2:59

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA BEST THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY

EagorLuvsBigFoot 8

Wednesday 6 June 2012 3:50

* Hear. And lighten up, will ya?

alexlovescandy 3

Wednesday 6 June 2012 4:15

Bahahaha I like your mom!!

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Wednesday 6 June 2012 5:01

This takes the phrase "crazy cat lady" to a whole new level...

livelobster123 14

Wednesday 6 June 2012 5:32

This lady is going places..... Especially to the mental hospital. LOL

HeartOfLead 24

Wednesday 6 June 2012 5:34

Pussy does rule the world.

Keywords

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Today, I got popcorn when getting groceries. I was excited to see popcorn butter spray on sale and decided to try it. Excited, I made some popcorn while I went to use the can. Butter sprayed like an aerosol can all over my desk and floor. Now, my apartment smells like a movie theater and there's butter EVERYWHERE! FML

I agree, your life sucks 196

You deserved it 336

Today, I'm 25 and still a virgin. At this point I'm not sure to feel embarrassed or proud. Imagine being 25 and not know what the fuck you are doing in the bedroom. I don't know who it would be more awkward for, me or them. Maybe I'll just avoid human interaction all together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 141

The Top

Today, I'm in a US college. I could've gone into a trade or internship, but no one listened. Now, while my parents brag to their friends that their child has a degree, I'll probably be spending the rest of life in crippling debt, sleeping on the side of the road, and begging strangers for table scraps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 228

You deserved it 472

Today, I had another dinner with the girl that I started dating a few weeks ago. During dinner, we talked about our families. We realized that we're actually cousins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 908

You deserved it 204

Today, I got an X-ray and the nurse happened to mention the old break in my leg. Mom always said it was my twin brother who'd broken his leg. Can you see where this is going? I have now confirmed that at some point mom mixed me and my brother up, so we’ve being using each other’s names for 35 years FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 781

You deserved it 123

Today, I was lying on the sofa when the phone rang. I jumped up to answer in time. I knocked over my laptop, and kicked my guitar into a glass causing it to smash. It was a wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 620

You deserved it 11 900

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 580

You deserved it 47 168

Today, my family sat me down and told me I was spending way too much time with my boyfriend and not enough time with them. My boyfriend has been away in Iraq for six months and just came home a week ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 727

You deserved it 2 588

Same thing different taste

Every day is Caturday

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