Love: Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend....

By nightowl506 - 21/11/2011 07:22 - United States

Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 905

You deserved it 4 025

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 16/02/2015 12:57 - Australia - Rockdale

Today, I received a bunch of flowers from my 'lover'. This would be fine, except that I don't have a lover, and my boyfriend now thinks I'm cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 614

You deserved it 2 977

By britney - 15/02/2010 02:54 - Canada

Today, I got flowers sent to my work, I happily opened them in front of my co-workers thinking they were from my crush, I open the card to see "Love you, from mom". My mother thinks my love life is so pathetic, thats she needs to send me flowers to cheer me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 122

You deserved it 5 593

Live, laugh, love no one

By Anonymous - 15/03/2021 23:01

Today, I got flowers from a secret admirer. Turns out they were from my sister's in-laws who own a flower shop. Apparently, everyone feels bad that I'm single and they are convinced I'm gonna die alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 926

You deserved it 104

By Oh hells no - 16/09/2013 07:26 - United States - Los Altos

Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 546

You deserved it 12 127

Thanks, I guess…

By edible - 20/05/2009 20:01 - United States

Today, I surprised my girlfriend by sending her an Edible Arrangement. When she called to tell me she had gotten it, she was more excited about the cute boy who'd delivered it than she was about the fruit bouquet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 547

You deserved it 4 088

So brave…

By just say you want to leave! - 02/10/2023 16:00

Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 070

You deserved it 101

By mfnfhdjdjddjsjfn - 03/09/2012 08:39 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I was in a terrific mood after finding a bouquet of beautiful flowers on my doorstep when I came home. That is, until I recognised the handwriting of my "secret admirer" was the same as my mother's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 119

You deserved it 2 220

By Anonymous - 02/07/2015 02:04 - United States - Lees Summit

Today, I sent the girl I like flowers, only to have her later post a picture of them online, saying, "Ha! When losers send you flowers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 767

You deserved it 2 569

By Alex - 08/05/2016 19:12 - United States

Today, after spending $120 to have a bouquet of flowers delivered to my mom, she called to complain that I had forgotten about her for Mother's day, but also praise my sister for apparently receiving my flowers I sent at the door and passing them off as hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 680

You deserved it 916

By Anonymous - 14/02/2013 13:18 - United States - Allendale

Today, just so my family would think someone might actually be interested in me, I bought myself roses and attached a secret admirer card to them. My plan would have worked if I hadn't forgotten to take the receipt off the kitchen counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 230

You deserved it 44 099

s1d1ouz 2

Monday 21 November 2011 16:06

They're just jealous

VaanBasch 1

Monday 21 November 2011 16:07

The solution is obvious. Dump your boyfriend for not existing. The jerk...

Comments

AnimeGamer13 2

Wednesday 23 November 2011 12:58

You should let your parents talk to him on the phone or skype if he can't come over to meet them in person

BlackBlazeCobra 16

Wednesday 23 November 2011 20:46

By long distance, I hope you met him in real life beforehand.

brooks10101 1

Wednesday 23 November 2011 20:54

Ha ha is meg griffin your name

Ebonylynn7 0

Wednesday 23 November 2011 23:14

Make them meet!

WVU 0

Wednesday 23 November 2011 23:45

Nice

jazzy_123 20

Thursday 24 November 2011 10:02

Lmaaaooo

boohoou1994 5

Thursday 24 November 2011 23:48

@120 LD relationships do work, sorry that all you seem to attract are hoes =

kkeener12 5

Tuesday 29 November 2011 9:54

just like George Glass in that Brady Bunch movie!! Your parents must have watched "A Very Brady Sequel" one too many times.

chubby_choco 17

Tuesday 17 January 2012 23:36

...what are they going to do when you get pregnant? Accuse you of going to a sperm bank?

pipinya 8

Wednesday 17 October 2012 9:35

If your boyfriend ISN'T the state postal service, then, well, they're just jealous!

Keywords

Kids Art Health Birthday Covid Relatable Transportation Awkward Cars Love Poopoo peepee Gross Family Intimacy Sex Neighbours Lonely Dreams Work Management Jealousy Mental health Relationship advice Miscellaneous Friends Abuse Parents Healthy Lifestyle Food Ironic

The Top

Today, I found out you can’t lie about having a Master’s Degree in order to get a job. I paid a friend $500 to make a very real looking Master’s diploma from an accredited school. My plan worked well, until they asked me for my official transcripts. Meaning it has to come from the institution directly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40

You deserved it 1 308

Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 877

You deserved it 5 658

The Top

Today, I came back from my prom and no one was home. I took off my dress, panties, and bra, grabbed the cake I'm not supposed to eat, and went to watch Walking Dead in the living room. My family was there already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 819

You deserved it 5 200

Today, while wiping my ass, the broken finger that has been set straight dipped into the toilet and touched a turd. This keeps happening since I broke it, and I'm sure it will again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 381

You deserved it 12 030

Today, after swimming in the pool, I went into the shower. Little did I know that my niece was hiding in there. She excitedly yelled "I saw your boobs!" Now my nephew won't stop crying because he didn't get to see them as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 377

You deserved it 4 395

Today, I was bringing a table a bowl of soup at my waitressing job. A new customer taking off his coat threw his elbow out, violently knocking the soup out of my hands and onto his baby in a highchair. The baby screamed; I had a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 889

You deserved it 144

Today, while working my shift at the grocery store, we ran out of muffins. I'm a little overweight, and I guess that's the reason an irate customer accused me of eating all of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 240

You deserved it 4 555

Today, I came into work with a new hair cut and so far everyone has asked me If I lost a bet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 830

You deserved it 3 577

Same thing different taste

Live, laugh, love no one

Thanks, I guess…

So brave…

Top comments

Comments