Love: Today, I realized that the only woman who shows any sexual interest...

By gerontofuck - 15/04/2014 21:55 - Canada - Red Deer

Today, I realized that the only woman who shows any sexual interest in me at all is my 70-year-old neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 855

You deserved it 4 644

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Same thing different taste

By JubileeBee - 28/09/2011 10:46 - United States

Today, I found out that my seemingly innocent 80-something neighbor has been stalking every girl in the neighborhood, and considers me his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 358

You deserved it 2 416

By Eimii - 06/10/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, my 70 year-old coworker gave me a letter telling me he was attracted to me, and wishes to have a relationship in which he can 'hold me in his arms every night'. I'm 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 148

You deserved it 3 303

By noosher0990 - 18/02/2010 00:30

Today, I found out that my neighbor gets more pleasure out of me and my husband having it off then I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 933

You deserved it 2 767

By pear8head - 08/08/2009 16:31 - United States

Today, I ran into my new apartment neighbor. She said she could hear me and my girlfriend having wild sex last night. She told me she had always wanted to have a threesome. My new neighbor is as old as my grandma, and even resembles her. I politely declined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 290

You deserved it 5 906

By Anonymous - 05/01/2012 05:17 - United States

Today, I'm so insecure that I was still slightly flattered when the demented old man at the nursing home where I work hit on me, because at least somebody finds me attractive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 139

You deserved it 3 556

Bizarre love square

By Lucky - 18/09/2023 10:00

Today, after almost 20 years of celibacy, a beautiful young woman surprisingly took interest in me, and we get along great. My close female friend, who I did once have feelings for, but who always made it clear she'd never see me "in that way" is having a full-blown emotional breakdown. Well, according to her husband anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 111

The neighbor from Hell

By Creeped - 27/09/2012 08:19 - United States

Today, I'm hiding from my creepy next-door neighbor. She constantly trash-talks my partner of two years, she's mentally unstable, looks to me for support, has a raging crush on me, and she drunkenly tried to make out with me last weekend. I'm two months older than her daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 839

You deserved it 1 814

TMI

By Anonymous - 29/03/2021 21:59 - United States - Crystal City

Today, my neighbor, who is an elderly woman that I barely know, decided to tell me about how she feels she's lost too much weight and now when she looks at herself naked she thinks her boobs hang and look like bull testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 105

Forever alone, forever

By AloneAtPerkins - 14/06/2020 05:04

Today, I realized that I've only had 3 men show interest in me: A blind man, a drunk, and a guy so desperate, he's been trying for over 5 years of solid "No"s. I'm 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 296

You deserved it 357

By anonymous neighbor - 30/01/2009 14:42 - United States

Today, I went on a date with my really attractive neighbor, and at the end, when I leaned in to make out with her, she shook my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 762

You deserved it 6 639

cakefete2 30

Wednesday 16 April 2014 2:40

Not so much huge as long.

SamSwebb 24

Wednesday 16 April 2014 2:15

Better than no-one ... I guess :)

Comments

chrisnee62 6

Wednesday 16 April 2014 4:57

I saw the words sexual, interest, and 70-year-old and I started to worry it was going to be his grandma

dimple13194 10

Wednesday 16 April 2014 4:57

Sexy

martin8337 35

Wednesday 16 April 2014 5:30

Is she a hot 70 year old?

weveallbeenthere 30

Wednesday 16 April 2014 5:30

go for it, you never know.

birdybirdchirp 18

Wednesday 16 April 2014 5:31

awe haha.. Yes man Yes man Yes man!!

jarobjent 17

Wednesday 16 April 2014 5:43

At least you don't have to worry about any unplanned pregnancies.

AlexRen 21

Wednesday 16 April 2014 6:16

Are you sure that women aren't interested in you? Or are you saying that because you're shy?

ethanszlez 14

Wednesday 16 April 2014 6:37

Well how old are you?

NineeCat 32

Wednesday 16 April 2014 7:05

I bet that sweet old lady can do some crazy shit! What, with 70 years of experience and all....

beachygirl24 13

Wednesday 16 April 2014 7:47

Love the username

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I tried to nicely talk to my daughter about her rapid weight gain. Having a family history of weight-related illness, I felt it was necessary. I offered to get thyroid tests, teach her to buy healthy food, and start routine exercise. She told everyone I called her a cow and had fat-shamed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 192

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 169

You deserved it 134

The Top

Today, my ex-boyfriend was granted parole, community service, and “rehabilitation” for the crime of breaking into my house, kidnapping my dog and killing her while I was at work, as retaliation for me breaking up with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 490

You deserved it 95

Today, I realised that the man who I wanted to be with, the man who wanted to be with me, and my husband were three different people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 846

You deserved it 26 140

Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 493

You deserved it 375

Today, my roommate and I finally went to the DMV to transfer our vehicle ownership title to our names. On our way out, we joked that we were now responsible for any violations involving our car. We came back to a $35 parking ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 965

You deserved it 23 515

Today, after a long day at work, I was ready to wind down for the night. I sat on my bed and turned towards a fluttering on my left. I saw the biggest daddy-longlegs inches from my face, jumped in the other direction, forgetting there was a wall, and hit my head on it. I'm now officially wide awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 247

You deserved it 242

Today, I spun off the road and into a ditch. The insurance company told me I'd have to wait an hour, as they had other cars to tow first. I had to pee so badly that I resorted to using the only thing I had in my car: a plastic bag. That's when I got a knock on my window from the tow truck driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 699

You deserved it 6 093

Same thing different taste

Bizarre love square

The neighbor from Hell

TMI

Forever alone, forever

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