Miscellaneous: Today, I learned that everyone at college was calling me "Parallel...

By Anonymous - 08/11/2010 18:16 - France

Today, I learned that everyone at college was calling me "Parallel Lines" because I've got an unibrow and an apparent hairiness over my mouth. By the way, I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 798

You deserved it 15 730

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By xxxchelsiexxx - 06/02/2011 06:02 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with my two friends. My hair was hanging over my upper lip, making it look like I had a big mustache. "Hey, look guys!" I said. "I have a mustache!" "I know," they both said without looking. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 368

You deserved it 7 834

Mistaken identity

By Anonymous - 15/05/2022 07:00 - Brazil - Fraiburgo

Today, after cutting my hair and shaving, I had girls hitting on me for the first time ever! Too bad they thought I was a butch lesbian, not a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 992

You deserved it 152

By Anonymous - 28/08/2010 23:40 - United States

Today, I found out that my entire school differentiates me from another girl in my grade with the same name by saying, "No, she's the lesbian one." I'm straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 619

You deserved it 3 092

By Eternal_Babyface - 08/11/2015 17:14 - United States

Today, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning the fact that my new coworkers keep mixing up my gender. She looked at me critically and said, "Yeah, until you can grow a decent beard, people are going to keep thinking you're an intern or a butch lesbian." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 762

You deserved it 2 317

By theyarefarapart - 09/05/2011 07:05

Today, I found out that my classmates affectionately refer to me as "the kid whose eyes are really far apart." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 769

You deserved it 3 566

By Sammylad - 07/09/2011 22:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a talk in class, when halfway through someone pointed out that my pubes were sticking out my trousers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 904

You deserved it 15 352

By jessel_ladd92 - 09/09/2013 06:42 - United States

Today, after growing my hair out for over a year and constantly being told that it makes me look like a girl, I finally cut it. The first thing my friends said when they saw me was that I now look like a "lesbian." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 623

You deserved it 5 830

By anonymous - 28/11/2013 11:41 - Canada - Sarnia

Today, I found out that since there are 3 people with the same name as me at work, I'm known as "the ugly one". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 521

You deserved it 3 565

By rarara - 30/10/2012 21:26 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 186

You deserved it 3 059

By The greatest Illusion ever - 28/10/2013 20:31 - United States

Today, I went to school without any makeup on. The guys who usually compliment me for being pretty are now calling me "The Greatest Illusion Ever". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 154

You deserved it 21 381

cabbitt 0

Monday 8 November 2010 22:41

Don't whine about it. Fix it.

rpvia 0

Monday 8 November 2010 22:39

your name must be helga

Comments

goldhighways 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 6:16

how did you just figure that out? I would assume you look in the mirror everyday like most of us girls do....how could you my notice that..

goldhighways 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 6:18

not notice*

xcookier 2

Tuesday 9 November 2010 6:26

parallel lines ? how lamee.

vbmg152 18

Tuesday 9 November 2010 6:40

Three words.... Wax, Tweezers, Razor!!! Problems solved!!

cuddlekitty66 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 6:52

So wax or something. God. Not that hard.

DemCoolBeans 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 7:19

Mustaches are... distinguished.

Thanateros 1

Tuesday 9 November 2010 7:28

That's ******* disgusting what the **** is wrong with you?

suzuki2005 2

Tuesday 9 November 2010 7:37

Sasquatch

G_thelegend 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 7:48

shave or wax honey

mpphish 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 7:54

so Uh wax?! easy as that

restythestar 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 9:13

erghh Unibrow. remind me of Bosingwa *any football fans must get this*

Keywords

Relatable Students Mental health Work Parenting Kids Awkward Embarrassing Love Wanker Intimacy Family AITA First Dates Singing Cats Animals Weddings Public freakouts Bodyshaming Cops Transportation Cars Sex Sexism Growing old Health Periods Job interview Education

The Top

Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said, "You know? I like little girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 360

You deserved it 61 103

Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I have no sex drive, but faked it to avoid hurting his feelings. It was after he confessed he is not attracted to women, but forced himself to have sex with me because he didn't want to admit he is gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 212

You deserved it 3 633

The Top

Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 553

You deserved it 4 111

Today, my brother found 100 bucks in his coat pocket. He was so happy he bought 2 new games for his x-box. He was borrowing my coat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 596

You deserved it 8 510

Today, I took some new allergy medicine I had never tried before, and I didn't bother reading the side effects. I then went to school. It was almost an hour before dismissal when I had felt a warm feeling on my legs. One of the side effects to my new medicine was bladder control problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 035

You deserved it 27 681

Today, I had a shift as a carer in a high-rise disability home, and working with a lady whom was once a midwife. She had a toy baby, and was rocking it. When I asked her what she was going to do what the baby so she could come to lunch, she casually threw the baby off the balcony and shrugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 525

You deserved it 523

Today, concerned about my daughter's recent behavior, I looked through her web browser history. I found web searches for information on how to make a bomb to blow up a "horse". I'm not sure if she's illiterate, but either way it seems I need to get her some help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 147

You deserved it 4 293

Today, my boss announced he will be taking bereavement leave due to his father passing away. For some reason I’ll never understand, I got the urge to laugh. I tried so hard to hold it in but it was very obvious. If looks could kill, I wouldn’t be able to write this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 1 123

Same thing different taste

Mistaken identity

Top comments

Comments