Work: Today, I gave a carpet shampooing demonstration in a stranger's...

By Anonymous - 13/06/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I gave a carpet shampooing demonstration in a stranger's home. To my surprise, the white expensive carpet was dyed grey due to something in the solution. The owner held me hostage in her house by barracading the door until my manager got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 553

You deserved it 9 083

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Same thing different taste

By JB - 07/12/2011 14:29 - United States

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 011

You deserved it 28 737

By carpetoops - 21/06/2009 16:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I spilt purple washing detergent all over my white carpet. Desperate to get it up I grabbed a blue towel and started mopping it up. The detergent hasn't stained the carpet at all, the blue dye from the towel has. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 835

You deserved it 35 550

By gypsy - 24/06/2011 02:00 - Australia

Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 280

You deserved it 37 735

Creepy and spooky

By Dino - 12/10/2012 06:36 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 737

You deserved it 2 365

By Danielle - 09/04/2011 23:00 - United States

Today, while dog sitting, the dog peed on the carpet. There was a bottle of cleaning spray on the counter so I sprayed the spot. Turns out that spray was Clorox Bleach. Now their carpet is bright orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 322

You deserved it 27 362

By kebaby - 19/06/2010 23:19 - United States

Today, I spent a long time steam-cleaning a mystery stain on my living room carpet. I turned the light on to get a better look at it, and realized that it was a shadow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 936

You deserved it 48 177

Welcome back!

By Terry - 21/02/2023 08:00 - United States - Tampa

Today, my girlfriend works for a company that cleans VRBOs, so while she went to see family for a week, I asked her coworkers to come clean while she was gone, even the owner of the company showed up, They deep-cleaned house, but when she got home I got yelled at for a dirty coffee mug on my desk. The coffee was still warm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 072

You deserved it 116

Deadly cocktail

By blame the maid - 13/09/2020 17:02 - United States

Today, my very sheltered girlfriend decided to surprise me by cleaning our apartment. Although she grew up with housekeepers and maids, I thought it was common knowledge that you don’t try cleaning the bathroom with both bleach and ammonia. We still can’t go back inside our place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 641

You deserved it 150

Don't let the bedbugs bite!

By sleepingonthetoilet - 28/03/2018 08:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, my supervisor locked me in the women's bathroom as I was cleaning it. I heard the owner scolding him, so I waited for the door to open, thinking he got in trouble. It wasn't until I heard the front gate locking that I realized I'm staying the night in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 509

You deserved it 389

Silly idiot

By Heather - 04/03/2010 12:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I was quite happily glossing my new bathroom door, when my useless, alcoholic, housemate came rolling in, knocked the paint over, stood in it, and without realising, walked it all the way down the stairs. I had just had a brand new carpet fitted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 238

You deserved it 3 683

manoverboard 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Well, if it was THAT expensive, they shouldn't have taken the chance. I said it's their fault.

SadinSherman 16

Monday 3 October 2011 18:44

A job is a job

Comments

RoflBen 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:31

Giant dick cockmonster penistermonger

Weil 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:31

Are you so much of a pussy that you couldn't even keep a woman from holding you hostage? ******* grow a pair.

jackfm5 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:32

she should of called the cops on you get a real job f her life for having a lame carpet salesman mess up her carpet

alex_vik 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:36

#13 - Rape is always funny. Unless it actually happens.

NightVisionShoes 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:40

that's no big deal.

paperfox_fml 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:44

That's why we spot test! But really she deserved it, what kind of nut buys a white carpet? And #18, can you not even enjoy a comedy website without bitching about people who have different political views than you? You must have a really tiny dick/****.

angelnursery 18

Friday 8 July 2016 0:46

this is why you're single

ziqi92 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:44

barracading?? thats creepy...

16274692 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:51

#18..there was no problem to explain, it just didn't work? funny story, must've been awkward. :}

BeefIronAndWine 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 1:05

#13: False. Picture Proky Pig raping Elmer Fudd. And, unless I'm missing something, this FML doesn't state the gender of the salesperson or the homeowner.