Love: Today, for the second time this week, I had to ask my 27-year-old... - FML

By lizann - 03/04/2012 05:39 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, for the second time this week, I had to ask my 27-year-old husband to stop peeing on the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 481

You deserved it 4 670

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Relationship goals

By Anonymous - 17/05/2015 05:10 - United States

Today, my husband missed the toilet again. I would have been less disgusted if he'd peed this time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 485

You deserved it 2 696

By Miramichi - 30/05/2011 12:18 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he pees on the toilet seat just to piss me off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 598

You deserved it 8 943

By nycol - 17/02/2012 14:13 - Australia

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old boyfriend why it is not okay to pee in the pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 971

You deserved it 5 358

By makehimscrubit - 14/09/2016 03:18 - United States - Hawthorne

Today, I found out the guys I live with have an ongoing contest to see if they can hit targets on the inside of the toilet lid with urine when they pee. I could forgive this in my seven-year-old son, but not my forty-year-old husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 138

You deserved it 1 386

By SeatofIgnorance - 29/08/2017 04:30

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 680

You deserved it 4 973

Gross dude, dude

By GhostPenguin - 08/10/2021 11:01 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, I had to tell my 30 year-old boyfriend to take a shower, or else he won't for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 177

By notpayedenoughforthisshit - 21/07/2014 21:15 - United States - Boone

Today, for the third time this week, I had to clean up after someone who pissed themselves in the beer aisle at the grocery store where I work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 712

You deserved it 3 432

By sickness and health my sphincter - 22/03/2013 21:53 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, my 2-year-old daughter and my 27-year-old husband both woke me up in the early hours of the morning. Their complaints were the same: they'd both wet the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 380

You deserved it 3 046

Dude, gross!

By juggalo2 - 17/04/2024 03:00 - United States - Troy

Today, I came out of the bathroom and caught my husband peeing against a tree in the backyard. I told him how disgusting that was. He said, "Fine. Back to peeing in the sink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 439

Flushed

By Anonymous - 24/07/2023 03:00

Today, and once a week for the past three weeks, I had to tell some house guests to stop flushing things like Q-tips and tampons down my apartment's toilet. My preteen siblings? No, my 45-year-old mom and her similarly-aged boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 86

Next

Top comments

missanderson813 4

Tuesday 3 April 2012 16:02

I don't get guys. They can write their name in snow perfectly but can't aim for a large hole.

Enslaved 36

Tuesday 3 April 2012 16:00

Sometimes, I wish that home restrooms also came with built in urinals.):

Comments

holly_pop 6

Wednesday 4 April 2012 17:41

At least it's not an everyday. Be thankful he's at least getting it on the toilet and not the floor.

MeLikeBigBoom 8

Thursday 5 April 2012 3:14

Glue the seat in the "Up" position forever, so he won't pee on the seat anymore.

Vert90 11

Thursday 5 April 2012 6:13

Cuz you know, that'll enable her to take a shit without any piss... And without a seat.... I don't want to live on this planet anymore.

xGoldenEvox 2

Thursday 5 April 2012 5:28

That's never going to change. Lol.

wdd2 5

Saturday 7 April 2012 7:25

Go with the saw approach, if it works on movie drug addicts its gotta work on aiming.

janerose21 3

Sunday 8 April 2012 22:43

hold and aim now that wasn't too hard! !

cave72 3

Monday 9 April 2012 17:37

I still can't believe that women complain about men peeing on the toilet seat or when we leave the lid up. Women leave it down and expect us to lift it and put it down every time. I know its a small thing but women are the ones that complain about it. What happened to equality?

wpolo02 7

Tuesday 10 April 2012 2:12

You should have left the seat up.

krez 20

Thursday 12 April 2012 11:33

Shoulda put that one in the pre-nup... there is no way you can win now! The only option left is to get a divorce and find a guy who is not an inconsiderate slob.

pigbilly 0

Friday 13 April 2012 10:29

I piss all over a toilet seat when I hear someone get pissy about that.. And women you stand up and piss!! Our penis isn't always the same ******* size! Does your ****** shapeshift every time you piss?!?!?!?

bleedingglitter 24

Sunday 24 May 2015 21:32

Well seeing as women don't pee out of their vaginas....

pigbilly 0

Friday 13 April 2012 10:34

I want no women to talk shit unless they have peed with their own penis

5
6
7
8
9

Keywords

Instagram Social Media Love Stalker Phobias Spiders Ironic Animals Embarrassing Bikes Transportation Ecology Health AITA Work Drunk Poopoo peepee Facebook Geek Mysterious Weird Vacation Gamers Video games Gross First Dates Smells Technology Parents Kids

The Top

Today, my wife and I got frisky in the living room, completely forgetting we recently gave our adult daughter access to our home security cameras for safety reasons. The cameras didn’t see anything but she now keeps making fun of my orgasm noises, which apparently she found hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 482

Today, my best friend’s girlfriend took his phone and blocked me on Facebook, all because I wrote him a heartfelt Happy Birthday message on his wall. I found out because he messaged me from another account explaining what happened. She refuses to understand that we’re strictly platonic friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 141

The Top

Today, I painted a kids room at my new nanny job while the dad "helped" by staring at my ass and telling me how hard it is to position your "junk" correctly when wearing a speedo. First day on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 325

You deserved it 3 845

Today, during an important exam, I had a huge panic attack and had to run out of the exam hall. Everyone saw me, and now everywhere I go, people keep pretending to have a panic attack and run away from me. I have to spend two more years with these assholes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 843

You deserved it 7 532

Today, I had to convince my husband that I'm not having an affair all because I refused to have sex with him. Apparently the fact that I gave birth to our twins 10 days ago isn't a good enough reason to turn him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 299

You deserved it 7 624

Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 833

You deserved it 2 431

Today, I met up with my ex girlfriend for coffee. It’s been months, and I was planning on flexing on her with my new car. Turns out, she also got a new car, and it’s newer, cleaner, faster, and better on gas... FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 104

You deserved it 3 601

Today, I went out to eat with a group of couples and my boyfriend. All my friends boyfriends paid for them. Mine didn't, and said that I should order off the diet menu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 962

You deserved it 5 634