Kids: Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD....

By MLGreco - 14/10/2011 16:11 - United States

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 457

You deserved it 5 764

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Same thing different taste

Sore loser, even sorer winner

By Silent Fan 2022 - 24/11/2023 22:00

Today, I beat my old college friend at CoD and mocked him vigorously, to which he replied, “Don’t feel bad for me, I have a hot wife, a baby on the way, and a house I paid off by selling my business. How are you?” I… won a video game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139

You deserved it 711

By Anonymous - 26/10/2014 03:28 - United States - Salem

Today, my brother got upset at his video game and flung his DS at the wall, just as I was walking by. I got knocked out to the sound of someone crossing the finish line in MarioKart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 195

You deserved it 2 879

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 03:16 - United States

Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 206

You deserved it 3 615

By BlazefireSaber - 07/07/2015 03:59 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with a broken finger, all because I beat my little brother in a Wii game. He ran over and twisted my finger, saying, "Now how are you going to beat me, cunt?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 518

You deserved it 2 989

By smellsofeggs - 26/11/2009 21:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 059

You deserved it 8 497

Dude, gross!

By Mojo0608 - 02/11/2014 21:28 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my 16-year-old brother once again scored well at a local archery competition. He got home and, once again, unleashed his "spectacular aim" at the toilet - or rather the toilet seat and surrounding floor. He refuses to clean the bathroom we share every single time he does this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 278

You deserved it 2 538

By NaomiMadison - 30/07/2011 05:15 - United States

Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 102

You deserved it 3 138

By Christine - 09/05/2009 06:08 - United States

Today, I saw my little brother playing with my new kitten. He is only five and isn't very gentle so I took the cat away and told him "You can't play with the cat! I don't think he likes you very much!" In a joking tone. The cat then bit and clawed my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 994

You deserved it 51 195

By john r.t. - 10/11/2012 00:30 - United States - Eagle Pass

Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 713

You deserved it 3 504

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/06/2022 14:00

Today, my friend beat me at a video game. He got smug, so I made an "I fucked your mom" style joke. Yeah, kina forgot for a minute that his mom died last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 1 263

DrDilllonReese 12

Friday 14 October 2011 21:26

Cats are slowly replacing dogs as the new killstreak

davymac718 4

Friday 14 October 2011 21:27

Payback is a bitch... Well in this case a pussy!

Comments

Caitlyn36 8

Saturday 15 October 2011 1:33

LOLOL first fml to make me laugh out loud! xD

MrSassypants 32

Saturday 15 October 2011 1:57

You mean laugh out loud out loud. :D

jdmarine83 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 1:55

Sounds catastrophic, throw a bucket of fire ants on him while he's sleeping.

angeluscado 15

Saturday 15 October 2011 1:56

That's so mean, but at the same time it's something i'd laugh at if I saw it in a movie.

garfield224 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:04

Should've used dogs.

djjaxon2001 4

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:07

Throw a ball at his head and say head shot b**ch

crw817 3

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:07

******* dumbass

Lunantic 6

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:08

Don't ruin a gamer's ego, they take it badly. At least he didn't teabag you or something. Fyl, op. :)

xXkingmikeXx 5

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:13

Lock him in a closet with a wet cat and snake

megan_lovee 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:29

well I guess he's an over reactor

HU4L188 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 2:32

I fuckong love cats

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 186

Today, after five years in a row of my family doing absolutely nothing to even acknowledge my birthday, I got train tickets to see my boyfriend for the weekend and celebrate with him. I woke up to six angry texts about how I'm "selfish" for not staying at home with my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 386

You deserved it 2 416

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I agree, your life sucks 2 190

You deserved it 367

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I agree, your life sucks 36 584

You deserved it 4 875

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I agree, your life sucks 51 573

You deserved it 6 883

Today, I finally went on a date with a girl I've been talking to for 2 years. She is my dream girl, picture perfect and I love her with all my heart. So I asked her, half jokingly, if I was her dream guy. Her reply? "Don't ask me something you don't want to hear the answer of." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 414

You deserved it 1 242

Today, I shaved my penis and balls. When my girlfriend saw, she said, "You look like my little brother." He's 6 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 444

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit because I snatched a couple of her fries for myself. She regularly raids my snacks, takes food off my plate, and has even stolen my work lunches, but a couple of fries is too much to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 139

Same thing different taste

Sore loser, even sorer winner

Dude, gross!

Heated gaming moment

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