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FML - The follow-up
pabj208 Say more :
OP here. Thanks for the comments everyone, you'll be pleased to hear that today I did phone up the restaurant posing as 'a member of the girl's team' (which is technically true), as I didn't want to identify myself. I can take a bit of banter as much as the next person, and although I'm sure it was meant as a joke, it certainly crossed a line. I thought I'd say something to his manager in case he repeated his actions to someone less capable of standing up for themselves than me! You never know
By pabj208 - / Friday 6 March 2015 00:07 / United Kingdom - Cardiff
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Small, cute flirting = okay Small hints at rape = not okay One time I had a waiter tell me that we should go out and get a beer... She seemed to be in her 40's, I'm 17... The awkwardness was so heavy, you could sink a ship with it.

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Oh my god no.. If OP had gotten drunk she wouldn't have been able to consent to sex, if they'd gotten very drunk they probably wouldn't have been aware they were having sex. The waiter acknowledged this and not only suggested to having sex without consent with OP but talked so lightly of rape (I hope you're aware now that they're referring to rape as the definition of rape is non- consented sex) to a literal stranger as if it was a commonplace thing.. Completely out of order, they should've been

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Am I the only one that didn't jump to rape but immediately thought drunk people tip better? As a server who works in a place where people may consume alcohol I find that the more alcohol people consume the more likely they are to over tip due to forgetting how to do math. All it takes is a couple extra smiles at bad jokes and suddenly you've earned a twenty dollar tip on a thirty dollar meal.

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That kind of behaviour is unacceptable. I hope you told his manager, and I hope that you ordered took whatever you were drinking and threw it in his face.

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I agree that there's a double standard, but the real problem is saying any of that at all. Unless you thoroughly know the person you're talking to and they know your sense of humor and your intentions, this is a pretty inappropiate thing to say.

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"The problem is the double standard. Man says that to woman, woman thinks the man is a creep. Woman says that to man, "hey, I might get lucky!" " That's not a double standard. A double standard would be a man getting in trouble for saying that because a woman complained to management but a woman not getting in trouble for saying that when a man complained about them saying it. What you described is just a difference in what men and women consider being flirting v

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