haha, you're retarded.

haha you're stupid.

Haha, not awesome.

Favorite!

I used to act like obe-wan kenobi but then I took an arrow in the knee

You can never lose when you use The Force.

I guess endangering yourself, your friends, and anyone else on the road, is awesome?

Haha awesome when instead of being pulled over you hit another car and kill someone. ******* idiot.

I think the starwars reference is what is awesome, lol.

The OP clearly states he was not drunk. He probably only had 2 or 3 beers, which in most places would make you blow over even when someone is no where even close to being buzzed. So to anyone who is calling this guy and idiot and saying he's endangering people, really need to chill out and find this super funny.

96 - you're an idiot. I'm assuming you don't drink? But 2 or 3 drinks will definitely give you a buzz.

96, the human body handles about 1 alcoholic beverage per hour. Usually no more and sometimes less. If you have more within an hour, you're going to be "buzzed." And whether or not you've ever stopped at two and waited for 40 minutes for it to kick in, I promise, you're in no condition to be driving.

Am I the only one who would do that without having any alcohol that night?

Am I the only one who would do that without having any alcohol that night?

Oh noooo!! Double send! Kinky iPhone app...

I swear to drunk I'm not God

That reminds me of the simpsons, when homer's drinking while driving. Marge goes: "Homer! Don't drink and drive!". Homer agrees, and then brakes to a full stop before each sip xD. But yea... drinking and driving, or drinking then driving, it's stupid either way.

When he walks away you then say to him: "Does that mean I can keep the weeed? *fake drunk hiccup"

121 You sir are the idiot. It depends on how strong the drinks are and how well that person's body deals with alcohol. I know for a fact 3 beers or shots even, would just only warm my belly.

Has anyone noticed op's name?

This is just awesome Op. I'd have been the one to say it.

20, 27, 30- haha, your comments are so pointless.

the snozberries taste like snozberries

I have a feeling that the people who say only drinking a few beers doesn't do any harm are the same people that drink and drive and end up causing an accident. Doesn't matter if it does not affect you. If your buzzed driving, drunk driving, or over the limit you're a complete moron.

96- *shakes head* are you ******* serious?

tell the cop hes your desigated driver

121 - Clearly a light weight drinker.

100% agreed

215 - you must be a survivor of a drunk driving accident, i mean ****, did a h2 hummer hit your face?

a couple drinks wouldnt give you a buzz, BUT OMG that's really funny LOL.

249- Are we in grade school? Guess because you could not dispute what I stated earlier you go as low as to insulting. So sad. Truly is.

#136 No you're not. I'm so doing that if we get pulled over. In the words of fluffy, "If you can make them laugh you have a chance."

Mr. Drunk, I SWEAR I'm not officer!!

If you're a girl. Just use your breasts to get you out of this situation ;)

95 unlike you, others are not ******* ******.

what would it matter if his friend who isnt driving is drunk? they didnt want to breathalize you but your drunk friend determines your fate? shoulda told him you were the designated drunk driver for the night.

107- nah his high friend got him in trouble.

Says the guy with only a pair of boxers on ofr his profile pic on the internet..... ......I doubt that chick was serious. I'm pretty sure she just sucks at joking. So simmer down on throwing around the title "*****" and don't get your boxers in a bunch.

Thank you, 95, for setting Women's Suffrage back fifty years.

117, I hope you realize that suffrage is the right to vote.

I was just kidding. Jesus. *******. Christ. Can no one take a joke nowadays?

You're so stupid! Of course "others" are ******. Are you saying she's the only one who would use her assets to her advantage? You don't seem to have an issue showing the entire world YOUR half-naked body. ******* hypcrite

Of course she doesn't... she just knows it sounds smart >.

^^ winner

Not falling for THE jedi mind trick??!! The force is strong with this one...

That's pretty funny. I wouldn't of personally said that because I'm a lot smarter than that but either way that's a funny story to tell anyone.

Luke I am your father!!

I used to be a Jedi then I took an arrow in the knee

3- I literally just figured out its lightsaber and not lightsaver. But I still think lightsaver sounds more bad ass!

You said the lords name in vain not once but twice. You shall burn in hell if you keep it up.

131 no one cares about your opinion...

Hey um...131...being stupid isn't a joke. KTHNXBI

207- thank you for the clarification, sir!

Do they? Where i come from, they taste like grandmas old pantyhose.

Of course they do XD And where you come from sounds thoroughly unappetizing, I'll stick to La-La Land, thank you very much.

Super Troopers

DO YOU BOYS LIKE MEXEEECO?!

If the good Lord had intended us to walk, he wouldn't have invented roller-skates

Damn. I gotta go back and check then. Haven't been to lala land in a while lol

super troopers!!!!!

Omnomnom

OP I feel your pain the Jedi are dicks.

The Jedi are not dicks?

155 - You, sir, are a dick, but Jedis are awesome.

Use enough commas..?

Well 159 why did anakin THE CHOSEN ONE swich sides and become darth vader unless he knew the grass was greener on the other side. YEAH THATS RIGHT I KNOW MY SHIT !!!

if ur gonna base your knowledge of that time period from that documentary called "star battles" or something like that, you should just be aware that it was VERY biased and really only showed one half of the story.

Alright I guess the jedi are alright but it was still a complete FLUKE that luke destroyed the death star like that.

That's exactly what went through my head.

mother of god :)

What?

Littering...and...littering and.... Smokin the refer

Smokin the reefer

Exactly, it's people like OP that make the roads unsafe for the rest of us. YDI and more OP.

Yeah, and it turns out that being tired is just as bad as being drunk when driving, and so is talking to a passenger or a hands-free phone, or a million other things that impair your driving, many of which do so just as badly as alcohol. Have you ever done that? Then maybe you should be a little slower to WTFCONDEMN.

wtf 69 overreact much?

And those things are quite different than drinking and driving, I know someone who got killed by a drunk driver so it kinda hits close to home

69 didn't overreact. They're right. If you're tired and driving, you could fall asleep at the wheel.

Yeah but 69 said that some of these are "just as bad as alcohol". Those may affect your driving but they aren't as bad as drinking...

But thy overreacted by the ending, assuming I did those things and therefore calling me a hypocrite

They*

Yes, actually they are as bad as drinking. Scientific studies have confirmed this, in terms of what it does to your reaction time and judgement. It's just that drunk drivers are a social scapegoat. If someone is killed by a tired driver, or a driver talking to a friend in the car, we don't say "my friend was killed my a social driver!" Google "tired drunk driving" and similar things, and you'll see this for yourself.

Okay well you have your viewpoint and I have mine I guess...all I'm saying is OP deserved it

Thank you 114 thats how I feel

Driving under the influence of driving?

It's called a joke, Kiddo

Im not trying to defend anything here but I think they do have a point, other things are as bad, so why not treat it as bad? Why do we hate on drunk drivers but then text and drive or talk on the phone and drive. I think anyone doing these (minus a few exceptions) deserve it. Also calm down, everyone is freaking out a bit. They are all like omfg omfg another driving that's drinking! Okay and how many of you have texted while driving, or on the phone? If you have if hypocritical.

**** you. Drinking and driving isnt the problem. Drinking driving and crashing is. I love drinking then driving through deaf children areas to test my ability to maneuver when drunk

#158, you shouldn't assume. I think people who text while driving are just as idiotic and treat them as such. And I've yelled at people through the window to get off their phones if they're using them while driving. Okay, so maybe I'm not the norm, but still....

If anybody overreacted it was you #7. Drinking and Driving is legal to a certain point in case you've forgotten. The driver didn't say he was drunk or wasted, so by saying that they deserved it and "whatever else", is an ignorant comment to make. Kbye.

Tell me how you're going to prosecute someone, let alone, prove someone is too tired to drive safely. You can quantify the amount of alcohol in a person's body, testing their level of sleepiness on the other hand is not going to work.

ShiningCelibi - did you really just say that drunk drivers are social scapegoats? I'm floored. I'm completely stunned by the magnitude of stupidity that is represented by that statement. For you to defend drunk driving in any way is reprehensible.

69 should pay more attention, the start of the FML implies they have been drinking, then end also implies drugs were involved. Very responsible. There is also warnings for these other types of driving!

******* idiot!!

How many innocent people have to be hurt and/or killed before assholes like you get the message that drinking and driving is NEVER ok??!!!!

untrue. texting and driving is.

I'm pretty sure that if he were drunk the cop wouldve breathanalyze or however it's spelled...it clearly says that only after his high friend said tht that the cop checked them...

Police officer: how high are you Stoner: 5"11

Problem is, no matter how many times you crossbow-whip people screaming "NOMINATE A DESIGNATED DRIVER!!!" there are some who just aren't going to listen. Sad state of the world.