Intimacy, Sex, Embarrassing, Awkward and Sextoys: She knew

She knew

By Anonymous - 23/05/2023 10:30 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, a photographer came to take photos of my house for listing. While showing her around, she said, “I’ll just get this hair tie out of the shot” and picked it up. It wasn’t a hair tie. It was my rubber cock ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 245

You deserved it 1 327

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Same thing different taste

By fashionVictim - 08/03/2009 20:35 - United States

Today, a guy informed me that the cute, really tiny little leather bracelet with little silver hearts and several snaps that I'd found in a head shop is actually a cock ring. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 662

You deserved it 12 999

Toys R Us

By microlovin - 28/07/2013 07:45 - United States - Pasadena

Today, my girlfriend wanted to try something new in the bedroom, so she got an assortment of different sized cock rings. She laughed when the one we were trying to use kept falling off, and said to try a smaller one. It was the smallest in the set. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 756

You deserved it 9 261

TMI

By Anonymous - 14/09/2019 13:00 - United Kingdom - Godalming

Today, I sent a photo of my flat to my mother to show her how tidy I’d made it. What I didn’t realise was that my lube and sex toys were also included in the photo of the bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 2 545

Toys R Us

By J…… - 07/02/2009 21:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys… a big black rubber cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 226

You deserved it 6 962

By Anonymous - 14/02/2011 17:15 - Belgium

Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 884

You deserved it 4 881

Spyware

By Anonymous - 26/06/2009 01:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 814

You deserved it 10 929

Then it dawned on me…

By Bad dad - 14/08/2022 22:00

Today, at my mom's house, my daughter came running up to me with some sort of love heart hair band, demanding to wear it straight away. After a solid 30 seconds trying to figure out how the band fit around a child's head it started vibrating. It was my mom's sex toy from her bedside drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 067

You deserved it 191

Ask first, snoop later

By Jenna Berreth - 07/10/2019 16:00

Today, I was trying to find my missing purple pen in the house I share with my boyfriend and his 57 year-old mother. I checked her room just in case, only to open a drawer and be greeted by a dildo. I’m never going to unsee that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 655

You deserved it 3 119

Oh no.

By Anonymous - 07/01/2018 01:30

Today, while cleaning out my daughter's closet, I found my missing dildo. It's a mold of my husband's penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 360

You deserved it 1 653

Twins

By rufusthepenis - 02/10/2011 22:57 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked like "Rufus the naked mole rat." She spent the next 20 minutes showing me pictures, describing in detail why they looked similar, and laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 314

You deserved it 4 846

Ubehage 32

Tuesday 23 May 2023 12:16

Why was your **** ring in full view for the listing photos? YDI

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 23 May 2023 3:53

Why's this an FML? Either she didn't know it was a **** ring or had the tact to pretend she didn't. Now, if your place lists as the "**** Ring Condo," then you'd have trouble!

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 23 May 2023 3:53

Why's this an FML? Either she didn't know it was a **** ring or had the tact to pretend she didn't. Now, if your place lists as the "**** Ring Condo," then you'd have trouble!