Runt of the Litter By junkjunkie - 11/06/2018 11:30 - New Zealand - Tauranga Today, in front of my 6 brothers, my mother told me I had the smallest penis at birth. FML I agree, your life sucks 4 256 You deserved it 318 Share Tweet Share
Today, my wife and I got frisky in the living room, completely forgetting we recently gave our adult daughter access to our home security cameras for safety reasons. The cameras didn’t see anything but she now keeps making fun of my orgasm noises, which apparently she found hilarious. FML I agree, your life sucks 119 You deserved it 406
Today, my dad, who never supported us growing up, and who calls once a month to collect his monthly living expenses, gave me an ultimatum: either buy him a plane ticket so that he can come live with me forever (he's a raging alcoholic) OR to send him $4,500 US Dollars (which where he lives is someone's 6 month salary). FML I agree, your life sucks 542 You deserved it 106
Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML I agree, your life sucks 55 604 You deserved it 5 260
Today, on a plane, a little kid was kicking the back of my son's chair. When the kid's mom went to the toilet, my son told this little kid, "If you kick my chair one more time, I’m going to kill your mom and you’ll never see her again." He stopped kicking but damn, what kind of son did I raise? FML I agree, your life sucks 390 You deserved it 224
Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 710 You deserved it 6 128
Today, I went to my friend's house to give him some moral support as he came out of the closet to his family. I left with a black eye. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 601 You deserved it 6 290
Today, I came home to find a man standing in my living room. Since my mom texted me that her new boyfriend would be coming over, I just assumed it was him. I introduced myself, made us some coffee and I went to my room to study. When I went downstairs after a while, the TV was missing. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 735 You deserved it 400
Today, after six weeks of dealing with various exterminators, my roommate and I were about to toast to what we were told was a wasp-free room. That's when we noticed several much smaller wasps flying around. Not only is our wasp problem not solved, but our room is a wasp breeding ground. FML I agree, your life sucks 23 079 You deserved it 1 461
6 brothers, and you’re the only sister.
How, exactly, did this come up in conversation?