Work: Primal - FML

Primal

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - London

Today, I realised that I've been working in an all-male environment for too long when my supervisor walked into the canteen visibly scratching his balls, and this seemed like a completely normal occurrence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 798

You deserved it 2 996

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Top comments

theHIGHroad2 5

Wednesday 21 March 2012 18:46

I love being a guy.. Things are just easier!! Sorry ladies..

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 21 March 2012 20:27

SkoomaKi - Boys don't have to shave? Maybe you haven't hit puberty yet and don't have to shave your face, but we adults do unless we want to look like a caveman. And what the hell do you mean that guys don't have to cook and clean? What the **** kind of misogynistic bullshit are you spouting? You sound like a complete asshole. I hope you continue beating girls in video games so that they continue ignoring your stupid ass.

Comments

good41thing198 7

Wednesday 21 March 2012 22:56

Canteen? Speak English you dyke.

Sniperkid07 6

Wednesday 21 March 2012 23:19

I love givin my balls a good scratch when i'm overseas right in front of the civilians. Funny as hell, dancing in Afghanistan was fun too. They've never even seen dancing, til I showed up.

greenmen 12

Thursday 22 March 2012 0:06

Get yourself known

efrainelboricua 12

Thursday 22 March 2012 0:38

Us guys scratch our balls. You girls scratch your boobs in sneaky ways. Difference?

magicalelf73_fml 0

Thursday 22 March 2012 9:32

You said it yourself - we scratch in sneaky ways, guys are pretty blatant about it.

akiahara 14

Thursday 22 March 2012 3:32

this didn't make sense to me anymore when I realized the OP is a guy...

KunoKanashimi 3

Thursday 22 March 2012 5:07

Spelling. You need to learn it.

HeartOfLead 24

Thursday 22 March 2012 5:35

Dude! Do you work in heaven?! I would love to be able o scratch myself without (female) judgment.

breeisdope 4

Thursday 22 March 2012 5:50

Please no one pay attention to 57 , those are NOT the advantages of being a women. She made us all sound like shallow, sex addicted ******! If your a true lady you wouldn't just sleep with someone to get what you want.

hoohaa17 2

Thursday 22 March 2012 8:31

and wtf is wrong with that ?

MerrikBarbarian 9

Thursday 22 March 2012 9:32

Right there with ya panda! Though I was already a lesbian so... XD

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Keywords

Awkward Cars Embarrassing Transportation Family Babysitter Relatable Kids Money Thief Health Depression Mental health Wanker Work Bodyshaming Love Annoying Vacation Students Parenting Intimacy AITA First Dates Singing Animals Cats Public freakouts Weddings Cops

The Top

Today, one of my co-workers, who I secretly hate, announced she and her husband were expecting. She's rather big. Without thinking, I said, "How did he manage to find your vag under those fat rolls?" I got placed on suspension and now have to attend a training on sexual harassment in the workplace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 3 795

Today, the soon-to-be father of my baby told me he thinks I'm an extremely selfish person, and that I don't love him. His reasoning? I haven't given him a back rub in two weeks, sleep too much, and have a hormonal problem. Once again: I AM PREGNANT! FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 096

You deserved it 5 868

The Top

Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 183

You deserved it 4 681

Today, I bought some bitter-apple spray to stop my puppy chewing on everything. Later, I found out how effective it was, when I tried to eat a sandwich, and gagged at the horrifying taste on my hands. My dog seems unaffected, and continues to chew the table legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 758

You deserved it 4 166

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 118

You deserved it 4 955

Today, I seriously strained my back picking up my daughter. I’m only 22 and now I have a bad back a man in his 70s would be proud of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 365

You deserved it 276

Today, I blocked my landlord on social media messengers because he wouldn't stop trying to get with me, while living in a house with him, his wife, and kids. I wasn't interested, and wanted to be respectful and protect my living situation. My disinterest upset him. I now have until next month to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 318

You deserved it 94

Today, I was wrapping up my move in a 16-foot truck with my car in tow. Google rerouted me to avoid traffic... through a state park. The road had only one lane. I can still hear the phalanx of cars honking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 482

You deserved it 853