Miscellaneous: Panic!

Panic!

By Lotje13 - 01/01/2012 00:19 - Hungary

Today, I was sleeping over at a friend's house. I went and took a shower, and as I tried to get out, the door jammed. I called my friend for help, and after much tugging, the glass shattered all over me. She panicked and sent her dad to rescue me. It was the first time he and I had met. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 796

You deserved it 2 614

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Same thing different taste

By mrmr - 07/02/2010 18:32 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower and the glass sliding door was jammed. I tugged it, and it shattered all over me. I was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 530

You deserved it 3 022

By Anonymous - 28/02/2015 03:20 - United States - Auburn

Today, I fell in the shower and the doors jammed shut. I was stuck in there for hours, waiting for my parents to come home. They had to open the door for me while I was still naked inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 234

You deserved it 3 474

By Sparks - 13/03/2011 07:39 - United States

Today, after a few beers, I was exiting the bathroom of a loud house party when the door jammed. I had to climb out through the shower window. It was fool proof until my foot got stuck. I hung outside the house upside down in the dark yelling for an hour before someone figured out where I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 732

You deserved it 14 979

By xo007 - 04/11/2009 17:40 - United States

Today, as I stepped into the shower, I slipped and fell over the edge of the tub, pulling the shower curtain down with me. I called my roommate to help me up as I put on a towel over me. But before she could help me up, she grabbed her phone to take a picture. The picture became a mass text. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 772

You deserved it 3 739

Open door policy

By Luke Sparacio - 24/11/2023 00:00

Today, while we were exploring a building, my dad and I somehow got separated. After about 30 seconds, I found him on the other side of a door, so I went to go through what I thought was a door. Instead, I smashed my head on a windowpane and collapsed to the floor in pain in front of 5 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 189

Occam's razor

By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 803

You deserved it 4 714

Break in

By GodDaughter - 20/09/2009 00:08 - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house so I texted my cousin to come over and help me get in. She came over, stood on a chair and lifted me through the smallest unlocked window possible. Sadly, this was my bathroom window and I ended up head-first into my toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 671

You deserved it 9 988

By Anonymous - 09/12/2009 00:23 - United States

Today, while sleeping over at my guy friend's house, I woke up mid-air after falling off his abnormally high loft bed. Luckily, there was a table and 3 shot glasses to break my fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 629

You deserved it 3 872

By Anonymous - 27/06/2011 23:45 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend tried to climb up to my third story window in the early hours of the morning. Just before he got to the top, he slipped and fell to the ground. My dad had to drive him to the hospital at 3am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 894

You deserved it 7 716

By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 193

You deserved it 587

Sickly_Slick 4

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:25

Sounds like a intro to a Porno

monkeysareyummy 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:29

Dad later that night: fap fap fap fap fap.

Comments

panicbunny 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:23

Wow that's sad:( first btw :D happy new year

GentleGreenOhio 5

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:24

:O I feel so sorry for you.

BeaterOfTheDrums 15

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:55

I feel sorry for the dad; having to be put into a pedo-bear status situation... Unless he's into that.

lerouxmaster 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 17:27

Your... Your hair... it's... It's devouring my soul !

Jakesterk96 8

Friday 6 January 2012 23:27

So even though your friend knew you were in the shower, she sent her dad. Smart move.

littlej0n 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:24

that's one hell of an entrance to make on your friends dad

derpster 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 11:22

MrMisfit- you have just earned yourself the official pedo-bear seal of creepiness.

thebaconweave 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:56

same with the guy in your picture

qtbabe127 22

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:25

Well, at least he'll never forget who you are:)

ohSNAPyall 26

Sunday 1 January 2012 16:54

Oh I remember her.. Nudey McGlassass.

Sickly_Slick 4

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:25

Sounds like a intro to a Porno

Fx13mz 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:32

"Sounds like you need some help in that shower" *Dad begins to undress* *Commence kinky porno music*

laundryninja 1

Sunday 1 January 2012 11:14

yeah was wondering who else got that vibe?

linkinpark98 23

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:28

Haha... well, yeah, FYL OP. :/

fundanger 0

Tuesday 3 January 2012 7:08

What's op?

KailyKii 11

Tuesday 3 January 2012 7:40

84 - It means original poster. It refers to the person that posts the FML.

monkeysareyummy 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:29

Dad later that night: fap fap fap fap fap.

AngrehPirate 0

Monday 2 January 2012 1:15

69 Thumbs up Winning ^

J1hill33 12

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:29

Wait are you a guy or a girl?

bananabuttercup 8

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:48

Dont know of many teenage giys who would sleep over at a girls house, or many girls that would send their dad in to rescue their guy friend.

J1hill33 12

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:53

Oh ok thanks. Just wondering

All_Blacks 2

Sunday 1 January 2012 10:27

I personally thought it was a good question to ask

Isoldael 27

Sunday 1 January 2012 18:24

Lotje is a dutch girl's name, so you guys were right :)

Doribella98 14

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:29

That sucks. Are you okay though? :-/

xShannonxSammyx 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 9:30

It'll make a funny story in a few years time! :)

zakkyzebra 11

Sunday 1 January 2012 10:02

It makes a funny story now >:)

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Health Awkward Jewelry Kids Fight Family Love Work Relatable Students Noise Animals Birds Sleep Mental health Medication Contraception Racism Pregnancy Relationship advice Cheating Teenagers Friends Sex Intimacy Embarrassing Food Revenge Boredom

The Top

Today, it's been a week since my mother died. She had no life insurance and was over $20,000 in debt, plus her hospital/funeral bills. My father wants nothing to do with me as she was a one night stand and he never paid child support. I'm behind on rent and bills because I'm injured from work. Thanks for nothing, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 143

Today, my best friend’s girlfriend took his phone and blocked me on Facebook, all because I wrote him a heartfelt Happy Birthday message on his wall. I found out because he messaged me from another account explaining what happened. She refuses to understand that we’re strictly platonic friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 116

The Top

Today, my fiancé and I decided to engage in some erotic food play. She covered every region of my body, including my genitals, with strawberry sauce. Today also happens to be the day that I found out I'm allergic to strawberries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 208

You deserved it 4 235

Today, I found $100 on the ground. My mom is taking $40 because she was there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 848

You deserved it 3 492

Today, my husband has been out partying all night. While my in-laws didn't ask him a single question, earlier I received more than six calls from them about when I'll be home to cook and clean. Where was I? In the office for the first time after working from home for past 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 030

You deserved it 106

Today, after months of delays, my home renovation is nearing completion. Well, it was nearing completion. Last night, a pipe burst, flooding the entire house. The water damage will cost more to repair than the entire renovation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 334

You deserved it 232

Today, I went to an important job interview, only to be told I'm not what such a "prestigious" company was looking for. This from a pimply-faced 20-something who took a personal call on speakerphone mid-interview, and actually said "LMAO" out loud at his friend's joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 657

You deserved it 2 121

Today, I wanted to eat my last bowl of sugary cereal before starting my new diet. I fell down the stairs with the full bowl in hand. Message received, universe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 638

You deserved it 8 079

Panic!

Same thing different taste

Open door policy

Occam's razor

Break in

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