Miscellaneous: Today, after a few beers, I was exiting the bathroom of a loud...

By Sparks - 13/03/2011 07:39 - United States

Today, after a few beers, I was exiting the bathroom of a loud house party when the door jammed. I had to climb out through the shower window. It was fool proof until my foot got stuck. I hung outside the house upside down in the dark yelling for an hour before someone figured out where I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 732

You deserved it 14 979

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Same thing different taste

Break in

By GodDaughter - 20/09/2009 00:08 - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house so I texted my cousin to come over and help me get in. She came over, stood on a chair and lifted me through the smallest unlocked window possible. Sadly, this was my bathroom window and I ended up head-first into my toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 671

You deserved it 9 988

Stuck

By Anonymous - 10/12/2009 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 347

You deserved it 5 231

Nice try

By groundedasfuck - 24/05/2014 20:24 - United States - Bessemer

Today, I snuck out of the house to go to a party. When I got back later, I tried climbing back up the rope-ladder I'd set up earlier, leading back through my bedroom window. I was halfway up when it broke free. I sprained both my ankles and had to shamefully ring the doorbell to get back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 102

You deserved it 55 165

By Anonymous - 28/02/2015 03:20 - United States - Auburn

Today, I fell in the shower and the doors jammed shut. I was stuck in there for hours, waiting for my parents to come home. They had to open the door for me while I was still naked inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 234

You deserved it 3 474

By FailedEngineer - 20/10/2009 21:31 - Australia

Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 266

You deserved it 35 647

Stuck

By Chub - 27/10/2009 04:45 - United States

Today, the door to my daughter's room became jammed and wouldn't open while she was in the room. Being resourceful, I grabbed my ladder and climbed up to her window, only to end up stuck in her window. I'm not sure what was worse, getting stuck, or being laughed at by my neighbors for a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 171

You deserved it 8 681

Party girl

By Abby - 11/11/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 078

You deserved it 39 588

Paranoid

By Anonymous - 10/03/2023 06:00

Today, after I was locked out of my apartment, I went down the leaf-filled ravine behind the building to get to the fire escape ladder, climbed up four stories and over the balcony, then wiggled through the window on my stomach onto the living room floor. Now I'm back inside and paranoid about robbers doing the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 207

By Anonymous - 22/01/2016 19:00 - United States - Royersford

Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 302

You deserved it 5 738

Oh, hello there, don't mind me

By downinthedumps - 13/01/2015 02:47 - United States - Detroit

Today, I went to take a piss in a public bathroom. Somehow, I managed to completely jam the lock. After minutes of trying to get myself out, I gave up and crawled under the stall, at which point someone walked in and was very surprised to see me on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 989

You deserved it 3 337

MissGrinch 4

Sunday 13 March 2011 12:33

Upside down? For 1 hour? Wouldn't a person lose consciousness rather quickly?

UpsidedownKayak 9

Sunday 13 March 2011 13:28

Any plan that was thought of and attempted "after a few beers" is never fool proof because, at that point, you are a fool.

Comments

MissGrinch 4

Sunday 13 March 2011 12:33

Upside down? For 1 hour? Wouldn't a person lose consciousness rather quickly?

you_freak 7

Sunday 13 March 2011 12:39

That's what I was thinking

chancehorsegal 0

Sunday 13 March 2011 13:08

exactly. wouldn't all the blood rush to their head and their foot would go weak?

Zebidee 8

Sunday 13 March 2011 14:53

For "an hour", read 'nearly five whole minutes'.

hey_its_kristi 0

Sunday 13 March 2011 15:15

"[N]early five whole minutes" is right. Sounds like an exaggeration.

caleb_m91 1

Monday 14 March 2011 14:43

you guys realize to pass out you need to have a lack of oxygen to the brain right ? there for you won't pass out from being upside-down. you will however pass out if you were to stand upright for a prolonged period of time WITHOUT moving anypart of your feet or legs.

teddybobo 2

Tuesday 15 March 2011 6:57

Caleb you are wrong. stop pretending to have medical knowledge

caleb_m91 1

Tuesday 15 March 2011 15:07

after some quick reading I am wrong. but it depends on the person on how long it will take to pass out from being upside-down. my mistake.

CAPTmok 7

Sunday 13 March 2011 12:38

probably too drunk to have gotten out by yourself

mikolyshka 0

Tuesday 15 March 2011 16:54

it's called a cell phone

netherflame 0

Sunday 13 March 2011 12:42

I guess you got to see the world from a new perspective, then.

clarissa_Gyall 0

Sunday 13 March 2011 15:44

lol yeahhhh riteee

mylifesucksserio 15

Sunday 13 March 2011 12:42

Wouldn't all the blood rush to your head and wouldn't you eventually pass out or go really wooooooozy

aardvarkish 15

Sunday 13 March 2011 13:14

Where are Moe n Larry when you need them?

MrRuffyboots 0

Sunday 13 March 2011 13:16

it's also possible that with his struggling he messed up the blood flow somehow? Or he's just lying and he was really hanging for a couple minutes.

UpsidedownKayak 9

Sunday 13 March 2011 13:28

Any plan that was thought of and attempted "after a few beers" is never fool proof because, at that point, you are a fool.

DocBastard 38

Sunday 13 March 2011 13:30

A few beers obviously means "half a keg". Just remember, when you're stupid enough to call something "fool-proof", someone will find a bigger fool. In this case, you found you. Edit: Damn you, Kayak.

Banana_Pancakes6 0

Sunday 13 March 2011 17:15

Doc, that isn't a picture of your patient, it's from "Superhero Movie"...

Sinkhole 26

Sunday 13 March 2011 18:36

I haven't seen that film (and don't plan to), but a simple Google search shows you that the X-rays in that film are completely different from the ones the Doc has on his profile.