Noise - FML

Noise

By wide awake - 31/07/2020 14:01

Today, I'm spending the night at my family’s house. I have to share a room with my two kids and their mother. The three of them snore like warthogs in a zoo. Desperate for sleep, I went to go sleep on the couch. The dog sleeping on the rug snores like an old truck. I’m never going to get any sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 377

You deserved it 218

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Same thing different taste

Zzzzzzz

By Alyssa - 21/09/2016 07:17 - United States - Spring Park

Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 303

You deserved it 1 221

By mskawaiibat - 29/06/2013 10:01 - United States - Laguna Hills

Today, my step mom and her kids moved in. This is my first night sharing a room with her daughter. She snores, sleep talks, and sleep scratches the side of the bed creating a sound like nails on a chalkboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 760

You deserved it 3 413

Zzzzzzzzz

By driving me crazy - 26/05/2017 16:00

Today, I had to temporarily relocate to my brother's room after mine was being repainted. Not only do I have to sleep on the floor, but I also have to put up with my brother and dog both snoring loudly. What's worse is that they alternate in snoring. Goodbye sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 845

You deserved it 410

By Sleepless - 05/02/2019 00:00

Today, my dad and I had to move in with my mom. There's only two tiny rooms, and my aunt lives there along with her dogs and my cat. The dogs have tried to kill my cat, I have to share the bed with my mom, who snores BAD, and I haven't slept in two days. I work early all week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 311

You deserved it 300

Make it stop

By Fuck - 18/10/2022 10:00

Today, I was feeling too tired because I couldn't sleep last night, due to my mother's snoring. Since I stayed with both my parents and my sister in a small town for a vacation, I requested to sleep in separate rooms because my mother's snoring is disgustingly loud. She refused, and called me a crybaby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 808

You deserved it 104

By Anonymous - 04/01/2011 07:30 - United States

Today, between my cats scratching every surface they can find, my boyfriend's snoring, and the dog barking at every slight noise outside, I'm unlikely to ever get more than 3 hours of sleep at a time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 113

You deserved it 6 047

Loud and long

By Anonymous - 01/12/2019 14:00 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, I'm stuck with sleeping in the same room as my mother. The problem? Her snores are extremely loud and a full minute long. I'm not kidding, I timed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 825

You deserved it 148

Tight fit

By Anonymous - 25/07/2022 00:01

Today, my two boys wanted to sleep in bed with us. My wife gave them the okay, even though there’s not enough room for all of us to lay. I’m now sleeping in my 3 year-old’s bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 834

You deserved it 152

Chainsaw massacre

By sleepless in sleeplessness - 18/06/2021 11:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend snores like a lumberjack. Even when I leave to sleep on the couch, I can still hear her through the door. She won’t go to the doctor because, "snoring runs in her family and they’re all just fine." Yeah, uh huh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 136

Fun times

By Anonymous - 14/10/2018 22:00

Today, I arrived at the house we rented for my sister's engagement party. I was also told that I have to sleep in the most cramped bedroom with my uncle, who sounds like a mortally wounded warthog when he snores. I paid for the rental. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 030

You deserved it 294

Next

Top comments

Perry85 42

Saturday 1 August 2020 11:27

I'm curious as to why it's worded, "My kids and their mother" and not "My kids and wife/girlfriend"....

BurnInDemonFire 33

Friday 31 July 2020 15:05

Earplugs, son. Or, if there's space outside, a tent.

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 33

Friday 31 July 2020 15:05

Earplugs, son. Or, if there's space outside, a tent.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 31 July 2020 16:51

At least you're get some work done on your similes.

AmbrosiaFan 18

Friday 31 July 2020 23:38

sleep in your vehicle.

Perry85 42

Saturday 1 August 2020 11:27

I'm curious as to why it's worded, "My kids and their mother" and not "My kids and wife/girlfriend"....

Keywords

Health Poopoo peepee Jewelry Awkward Family Kids Fight Love Relatable Students Work Animals Sleep Birds Noise Mental health Contraception Medication Racism Relationship advice Cheating Pregnancy Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Sex Intimacy Food Revenge Cats

The Top

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say, "Fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was "Pollo frito". I then had sex, constantly saying "Pollo frito" for an hour. I later realized I was saying "Fried chicken." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 488

You deserved it 183 654

Today, I went to a corner store to restock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 739

You deserved it 27 156

The Top

Today, I decided to ask my girlfriend of 3 years to marry me. I made brownies with walnuts and put an engagement ring into the brownie I gave her. Not only did she choke on the ring, but on the way to the emergency room, I find out she is highly allergic to walnuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 236

You deserved it 82 593

Today, at the end of a really long day my boyfriend was rubbing my back. I told him I appreciated how sensitive he was being. His response? "I was just trying to figure out how to unhook your bra." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 307

You deserved it 8 948

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 514

You deserved it 8 921

Today, I have dark hairs growing on my chest, nipples and stomach... I'm a 19 year old girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 429

You deserved it 3 510

Today, my girlfriend asked me to get her a pregnancy test. After using it, we couldn't find how to tell if she was or wasn't pregnant. After about 10 minutes of waiting, Google searching, and tension, I realized I had bought an ovulation test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 363

You deserved it 23 124

Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets the same amount of entertainment out of tickling me and having sex with me, and he likes the tickling noises better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 869

You deserved it 7 341