Sex, Weird, Frustration and Intimacy: Like a dream

Like a dream

By love and tolerape, apparently - 01/03/2015 19:24 - India - Jamshedpur

Today, after a 7-year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 156

You deserved it 8 399

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/02/2013 19:19 - Botswana - Francistown

Today, after more than a year of being single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, and after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even my dream-lover is a dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 961

You deserved it 6 004

By L - 16/10/2012 22:59 - Norway - Trondheim

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 625

You deserved it 6 906

By damnit - 16/10/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 689

You deserved it 4 261

By margelover - 11/10/2011 19:06 - Denmark

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 120

You deserved it 9 045

Bronies for life

By bestiality, not even once - 14/06/2013 22:29 - Ireland - Waterford

Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking to an episode of My Little Pony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 472

You deserved it 6 711

By Ryan - 11/06/2011 14:24 - United States

Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 287

You deserved it 7 464

Freudian

By giantblueballsthesizeofjohnnysinscock - 19/12/2014 23:14 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, after six long, hard years of involuntary celibacy, I was finally about to get laid. Except it was just a dream, and in it my mom stormed in just as things got heated, called me a useless cunt, and told me to go do my chores. I guess my brain forgot I moved out years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 110

You deserved it 4 650

By bestiality? do I look like a pig? - 26/05/2013 20:50 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I borrowed my boyfriend's laptop. Out of curiosity, I clicked through the bookmarks in his web browser. One of them took me to a site dedicated to sex stories featuring characters from My Little Pony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 222

You deserved it 18 338

By Anonymous - 18/08/2015 13:26 - United States - Manchester

Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 324

You deserved it 4 024

By Anonymous - 25/06/2012 22:08 - Denmark - Copenhagen

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 905

You deserved it 17 786

SkyGuy32 17

Monday 2 March 2015 0:03

Maybe you're just subconsciously a brony.

ZeroDying 11

Monday 2 March 2015 0:05

I had the same dream but with Elmo ...

Comments

rockwrench 18

Monday 2 March 2015 6:25

All I want to know is, did my little pony have a smoke afterwards?

lukian_fml 29

Monday 2 March 2015 7:25

Clop-clop

ooooohboy 15

Monday 2 March 2015 8:05

Hahaha that's horrible

eddyinfinity 21

Monday 2 March 2015 8:26

This is disgusting

Tutetheblack 20

Monday 2 March 2015 8:46

Pony rider!!!!

briang959 47

Monday 2 March 2015 10:18

7 years? That must be some sort of record. Unintentional of course...right.

the_real_dvd 21

Monday 2 March 2015 10:45

You need to move to a place that has more women and less ponies.

tsumi001 10

Monday 2 March 2015 11:57

I assure you. the sane bronies would be just as freaked out. though we are kinda rare I admit....

BooceBeats 6

Monday 2 March 2015 12:21

At least it was only a dream.

JHam12 14

Monday 2 March 2015 12:48

at least you arent a brony anymore

crack229 19

Saturday 5 March 2016 19:45

he never was

Keywords

Miscellaneous Weird Shopping Awkward My ex Racism Family Relatable AITA Love Kids Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cats Cute Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Coworkers Alcohol Health Psychology Mental health Cops Neighbours Scary Parents Stressed out

The Top

Today, my now ex-friend told me she had feelings for my ex and was also choosing him over our friendship, despite being fully aware of the crazy rollercoaster our relationship was and being there to hear every detail of the trauma. She classily told me at random, in a public mall. People suck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 432

You deserved it 236

Today, I came home to find my dad in my room, watching porn on my computer. When I asked him what he was doing, he closed the computer, stood up, stared at me awkwardly and then said, "You should really avoid those sites" and left my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 190

You deserved it 204

The Top

Today, I'm a social media manager, and a client complained about having to put forward her personality to gain followers, also refusing to promote her works personally on camera. She's an actress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 87

Today, I was working from home and accidentally turned my camera on when I joined a Zoom meeting, while not wearing pants. I had to pretend I was having technical difficulties to quickly put some on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 714

Today, it's my birthday. I was heading back to my apartment and I heard noises behind the front door. Assuming it was the surprise party I'd hinted at, I flicked on the lights… as two heavy guys pushed past me. I was robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 549

You deserved it 2 316

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 121

You deserved it 4 955

Today, after hours of non-stop work on an important case, I cheeringly blurted out, "And now, time for a tampon change break!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 302

Today, I learned why you should never to use Sean Connery's voice when asking your girlfriend to sit on your face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 1 960

Like a dream

Same thing different taste

Bronies for life

Freudian

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