It's gettin' hott in here…

By Alan - 02/09/2015 20:13 - Germany

Today, I agreed to stay a week with my wife's parents, who she told me were traditional Japanese. I was prepared for having to wear Japanese clothes while in the house, but I wasn't prepared for communal bathing in the same huge bath with her father, grandfather, uncle and two brothers. FML
I agree, your life sucks 24 761
You deserved it 2 497
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Top comments

creatureman 14

It's a way to learn their culture. While it may have been a surprise, her family might welcome you even more for being part of their custom.

366 7
ShortieRose 30

rub-a-dub-dub six men in a tub!!

330 2

Comments

PharmacyJoe 13

Hey, look at the bright side: At least now you won't have any trouble getting your back!

15 3
GhostFox 33

First off: if you didn't know to expect that, you weren't very thorough about prepping for the visit because bathtime being a social thing is pretty common knowledge. Second off: the fact they didn't mind being in the bath with you is a good sign, as they usually think foreigners are dirty. (Not out of racism exactly. More xenophobia from some foreigners not understanding you do the actual cleaning part BEFORE getting in the tub. The tub is for soaking and relaxing, the wash basin for actual scrubbing.)

36 5
Shade1982 20

I really think that is a very double-edged sword. On the one hand, I agree with you on preparing for 'strange' and 'foreign' customs before-hand. On the other hand, I don't think the other party should blindly expect newcomers to know the full custom and protocol of said customs. If you invite someone to participate in something like that, be prepared to guide and instruct them.

35 0
GhostFox 33

Family bathing is one of the most well known Japanese customs. So while, yes there is an expectation that one should inform guests about customs, if someone really thinks that immersion into a culture is just wearing traditional clothes "around the house" they deserve the culture shock for such shallow preparation.

18 10
DjeePee 24

If I was the OP, I would have counted on my wife to tell me about the cultural things I could expect, her being Japanese and all that..

29 0
Setareh23 34

It takes time to learn about anothers culture. Her family should be understanding of that. Yes, it's common knowledge, but as someone said, his wife could have mentioned it. And even if she didn't, it shouldn't be a problem. He will learn gradually, and participate in whatever he is comfortable with. As long as he is respectful, they should respect him :)

7 1
koganti 18

Your life doesn't get better by chance,it gets better by change. whatever it maybe, accustom to their tradition...op.

7 3
Rei_Ayanami 18

As a native Japanese, it never really occurred to me that this is strange. Almost everyone here has a private bath in their home, but public baths are still very common, and somewhat popular. I hope our culture did not bother you too much, OP. Bath time is a special time, with a pretty special order of doing things in, so I hope they did not judge you if you did anything wrong.

33 3
xcllla_ 27

Don't be a sissy, communal bathing is fun. You'll get to know each other better and get a stronger bond.

5 12
fotomiep 7

YDI for not properly looking up available info on Japanese culture/customs. Rather than going on stereotypes, showing a bit of interest in her heritage would have been the least you could do.

8 19
themadpeterson 10

Agreed. You would think OP would have cared enough about his wife to actually do some basic research into her culture even before the visit. Hell, I've never dated a Japanese girl, let alone been to Japan, and even I know about their bathing customs.

2 11
tiarnatargaryen 23

If you wanna fly that argument, FHL for not having a wife who cares enough to warn him about such customs. Although communal bathing is fairly well known, I think it's fair to not anticipate being asked to participate, given he's not a direct family member.

16 0
worldclassrager 39

Oh come off it...and get used to it...it's their culture...Americans probably have something that they think is wacky as well...

2 10
mads_fml 7

Eh American people cling to their toilet paper, and as an American, yes it's pretty uncivilized, and is a big contributor to general pollution and builds up in the sewage systems. Washing with a bidet is not really done. When I get my own house I'm getting a Japanese bidet toilet seat, because once you try it you never want to go back.

4 1
rainbowsRlove 15

ahaha sorry! too much sausage in that stew lol

6 2