Inspiring

By indierocklove - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML
I agree, your life sucks 31 738
You deserved it 8 933

Same thing different taste

By stressedartist - 09/09/2016 12:43 - United States

Today, I ran over Oprah. FML
I agree, your life sucks 499
You deserved it 70

Top comments

That's what got me going. Gotta survive the zombie apocalypse.

Comments

Love that movie...remember to limber up op

CattyPurry 0

2009 - Jenna Rose 2010 - Justin Bieber 2011 - Rebecca Black 2012 - Zombie apocalypse REPENT, REPENT, REPENT!

The slow ones Always die first. Just like in fast predators and slow children from family guy

flockz 19

and enjoy the little things. not sure what that exactly means though...

AaronTkr 0

lol. isn't part of the plot in that movie finding a Twinkie? I'd suggest watching something else if your trying to motivate yourself to lose weight.

You dont need speed, you need some guns.

you could loose weight OR you could surround yourself with slower friends.

kwchambers92 10

not bad for that scrawny little spit ****

Realistically you just need 100 outward facing treadmills to surround your house with and a gun with lots of ammo... And a sandwich.

Hey..whatever keeps you going :) good job.

victimization 0

why do all that work? just get fat friends. you don't have to be fast, just faster than a few friends

Or you can get some Juggernog and pack-a-punch your guns. It works for me

dont forget to find a guy who likes twinkies and dont kill bill murray please

carolinabreathin 0

I actually think you're my favorite person ever. :3

nilin95 1

**** ya zombie land all the way hoot hoot!

iPoopMusic 0

In the movies, zombies are slow as ****. You get caught because you wear yourself out. My tip: take your time, and don't shit your pants.

aFatFuck 0

If you're going by that logic then if you're black you're screwed....horror movies always kill the black character first...

OP. Why are you saying FML? This is amazing!

AaronTkr 0

isn't part of the plot to zombieland finding a Twinkie? if your looking to lose weight i think you should reconsider watching that movie.

That's what got me going. Gotta survive the zombie apocalypse.

kameryn25 3

you're fine as long as you follow the rules 1. cardio 2. The double tap 3. beware of bathrooms 4. wear seat belts 5. travel light 6. get a kick ass partner 7. don't swing low 8. use your foot 9. always carry a change of underwear 10. limber up 11. it's a marathon, not a sprint, unless it's a sprint then sprint 12. avoid strip clubs 13. when in doubt know your way out 14. shoot first 15. a little sun screen never hurt anybody 16. double-knot your shoes 17. the buddy system 18. pack your stain stick 19. check the back seat 20. enjoy the little things

95, I agree with everything but the strip club. Whats better than zombie strippers?

I would hide on a white castle if one were to happen Locked in where they stash the burgers is a better plan than running

RandomBanana_324 0

I don't get how this is an FML I bet everyone those that :) don't feel bad :)

forget the sharpend shovel, go for an E-tool (google it) or my personal favorite, a titanium crowbar

U will take along time to recover from

U will take along time to recover from the first swing on the e-tool I'd rather use a ballistic knife or my favorite a chainsaw

What does YDI mean? you deserved it or you dumb idiot?

idontcare8l 3

103 - lol thats funny cause for the first little while i thought it meant you dumb idiot too

It's true.They always fall down and break something making the zombie's job easier

I love zombieland! But it's true, it's rule #1, cardio. The first ones to go, for obvious reasons, are the fatties.

txgirl2013 14

Someone isn't gonna survive the zombie apocalypse

emmanizzer 6

You ever see a lion limber up before it takes down a gazelle?

Don't be stingy with your bullets..always double tap.

johnnybagodonuts 2

wait....you're not a zombie, you're ok THE HELL I AM!!!!!

KiddNYC1O 20
xShannonxSammyx 7

Rule Number 1 Cardio. Gotta enjoy the little things too... I Love Twinkies...

Also remember dont be bill ****** murry

Squirrelx 5

Always check the backseat. :)

bluebob13 10

haha I love the intro song!! for whom the bell tolls by metallica!!

haha I love the intro song!! for whom the bell tolls by metallica!!

Never get on those dropping type rides when zombies r chasing you... it never turns out good!!

i've been watching your movies ever since i was able to **********, not that there's a connection

The last time i cried like that was at the end of Titanic!

..going to shit in my pants for which there is a precedent.. -columbus

Your comment was my thought exactly when I first read this FML :P

completedumbass 0

HEY rules are ment to be broken..... Be a hero

completedumbass 0

"no twinkes" said little rock "shit ****!" said talehasse

Mcp12 0

Good for you but this is not an FML.

^^ You live in zombieland? I worry for your safety! Limber up my brother!

You're going to improve your quality of life and you're complaining?

um... yeah, that's pretty much what the OP said, thanks for, er, clarifying that...

50- I don't think you understand what 7 was trying to say. 7- I agree. Why is this an FML?

I don't know whether to put "I agree your life sucks" or "you deserved it". Is this really an fml?

iEatGuppies 0

right? OP: your upset because you have to work out? not really an FML.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking... How is this an FML? Good job on working out though :)

darklight549 2

Exactly what I was thinking. Poor fat guy.... Hahah

Best movie ever! I was waiting for someone to say it...

did this remind anyone else of penises, or is that just me?

Probably just you. But whatever floats your boat.

what's with all the thumbs down? Mine was a great comment.