Work: I am a lineman for the countyyyyyy…

I am a lineman for the countyyyyyy…

By Anon - 13/03/2014 00:11 - United States - Greensburg

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 644

You deserved it 3 692

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

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Unforgettable

By Anonymous - 25/10/2019 12:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, it was my first day of work at my new job. I got dressed and arrived early, only to find out that the store had closed due to a power outage. Then I found out that the person who'd hired me had totally forgotten about hiring me anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 115

By jobless - 06/11/2014 02:03 - United States - San Francisco

Today, for the first time since I can remember, I went in to work feeling positive, and that I could make good things happen. At the end of the day, my employment was terminated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 028

You deserved it 3 232

By :( - 06/06/2013 23:37 - United States

Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 898

You deserved it 4 749

By TacoMan32 - 06/12/2016 04:26 - Canada

Today, after months of unemployment, I finally started at a new job. The building burnt down on my very first shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 171

You deserved it 632

By Anonymous - 26/10/2010 00:22 - United States

Today, I went to my first day of work in over 2 years. As I approached the boss, he asked me what my name was. Turned out they hired the wrong person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 633

You deserved it 2 378

Toxic workplace goals!

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 23:37 - Australia - Mona Vale

Today, I walked out of a job interview feeling confident because I'd really hit it off with the interviewer. He called me an hour later to tell me that I didn't get the job, since he was afraid we'd "get along too well and never get any work done." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 832

You deserved it 3 735

By piece of crap car - 04/01/2017 06:27 - United States - Portland

Today, I was supposed to start my first day of work at my dream job. However, my car had other plans and refused to start. When I called my boss to tell him I was going to be late, he told me not to come in at all and fired me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 827

You deserved it 1 047

Suck up

By Anonymous - 22/08/2015 06:58 - United States - Cadillac

Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered, "Fucking tryhard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 791

You deserved it 3 416

Unnerved

By Greenskies - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - France - Corneilla-del-vercol

Today, I was talking to my boss at the end of an awesome internship. He said he was really satisfied with my work, and that he had considered hiring me. Turns out he decided not to because I smile too much, and it freaks him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 977

You deserved it 1 994

By Anonymous - 07/05/2014 20:57 - India - Kundan

Today, my boss was fired by the board. A few days ago, he dropped several strong hints that he was going to promote me soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 425

You deserved it 3 515

theonecasey 27

Thursday 13 March 2014 7:40

Be safe!

ThatFancyPenn 18

Thursday 13 March 2014 7:41

"On another note, welcome to the crew!"

Comments

dogbonelove 8

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:47

Buddy you dead

dasfro 2

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:50

Is it bad that I laughed hysterically after reading this?

Inkay 13

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:57

Maybe he just has a sense of humor?

Kfortch 9

Thursday 13 March 2014 19:57

Lol that's awesome. Sure he wasn't just kidding ?

GirlGamer12345 22

Thursday 13 March 2014 20:20

He was probably kidding. Don't it seriously OP.

squarecircles 13

Thursday 13 March 2014 20:32

Unless he has a super dark sense of humour, it was obviously the wrong thing to say. And even if it were true, what are the chances?

ValiaMaddox 4

Thursday 13 March 2014 20:33

At least he has a sense of humour.

grabyourhooks 12

Thursday 13 March 2014 21:36

Welcome to the brotherhood.

Sniper_Chick4110 20

Friday 14 March 2014 1:43

Good bit of advice my father gave me, don't ever put the wires in your mouth when working with electricity.

tfowl61692 14

Friday 14 March 2014 4:26

Godspeed! !

Keywords

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The Top

Today, during an unrelated appointment with my GP, he offered me a free check for chlamydia. Despite me reassuring him that I was STI free, he insisted that I should undergo the test. I ended up agreeing, only because I was too embarrassed to admit that I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 379

You deserved it 5 159

Today, my friends-with-benefits asked me if the girl who just added me on Facebook and Instagram is someone new I’m talking to, all within hours of this new friend adding me on social media. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 356

The Top

Today, I found an injured rabbit by the side of the road. I was about to take it to the local vet, when my husband picked it up and casually snapped its neck. "No rabbit's worth my money" he said, forgetting that he's been a jobless moocher for over 3 years. Pass me the goddamn divorce papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 938

You deserved it 2 633

Today, I was woken up by a call from "the Nuisance Call Prevention Registry". The lady on the telephone didn't see the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 485

You deserved it 2 246

Today, my granny died. My aunt wants to throw away all her books and furniture. When I offered to take care of selling it, or giving it away, like granny would have wanted, my aunt said she would let me "keep a percentage" of the few bucks I’d get for my troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 614

You deserved it 125

Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 950

You deserved it 8 443

Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several meters. While my helmet saved me from a cracked skull, nothing could protect me from landing leg-first in the dog poop somebody hadn't bothered to pick up. I had to go to school like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 321

You deserved it 323

Today, I told my parents how grateful I am for having them in my life and that not many kids are as lucky as me. My mom texted me after I went out 10 minutes later: "Are you ok? You seemed depressed earlier." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 284

You deserved it 5 536