Sex, Gamers and Intimacy: Headshot! - FML

Headshot!

By Amb - 01/06/2010 23:56 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 062

You deserved it 6 197

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Same thing different taste

What a Q-tip

By Anonymous - 25/06/2013 16:21 - United States - Flowery Branch

Spicy

Today, I heard my boyfriend making the same noises while cleaning out his ears as the ones he makes whenever we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 540

You deserved it 6 485

By Noname - 16/02/2009 00:33 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 038

You deserved it 10 596

By Anonymous - 02/06/2012 10:24 - United Kingdom - Northampton

Spicy

Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 245

You deserved it 32 722

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 374

You deserved it 5 765

A good grunting

By Anonymous - 06/01/2013 13:06 - United States - Tampa

Spicy

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 258

You deserved it 4 076

By atleasthelistened - 09/03/2016 08:04 - United States - Spokane

Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 539

You deserved it 2 447

By Hannah - 21/12/2010 17:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets as excited as he does when he gets a chopper gunner on Black Ops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 053

You deserved it 7 906

By The_Life - 12/10/2016 13:26 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I'm staying at my boyfriend's house and things were getting heated when he got a call from one of his mates wanting to play Counter Strike. Next thing I know, I'm laying in bed by myself listening to him rage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 057

You deserved it 1 274

By Helseac - 17/12/2018 03:00

Spicy

Today, I noticed my husband makes better sex sounds on the toilet then he does with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 739

You deserved it 440

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/11/2014 19:41 - United States - Los Angeles

Spicy

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 124

You deserved it 6 794

Next

Top comments

shakenbake93 0

Wednesday 2 June 2010 12:10

There's really no difference between the two so I don't see why you care that much.

Ducati4623 0

Thursday 3 June 2010 1:46

so he shouts "**** off you 8 year old little camping noob tubing prick" in bed? - that's pretty weird or winning would be more like "**** off I'm 1 off harriers" - again kinda strange I guess

Comments

futuredictater 6

Thursday 8 July 2010 20:45

trust me it happens to all guys

bluey111 0

Friday 9 July 2010 15:17

hey hey video games are serious buisness to us guys take it as a compliment

evilbunnypao 0

Friday 9 July 2010 16:08

i found this thread becomes war zone LOL well OP listen to #137, take it as compliment COD is serious business XD i know exactly how you feel, hahaha take it or leave it, you might surprise who he will choose you or his COD lol fyl

caboose261 0

Thursday 15 July 2010 18:44

Ha!!! Thats terrible, and #90 sucks at life as well lol

SoaringKiwi 0

Monday 19 July 2010 9:26

Super Smash Bros Brawl beats cods ass tbh...

BinxBreakdown 0

Friday 23 July 2010 9:22

lol i have the same problem

LeftyPitcher 0

Monday 26 July 2010 5:34

did he quickscope your nuke

reynoldssk8er18 0

Sunday 1 August 2010 3:37

he gets wargasms in bed

aggieskate900 0

Monday 9 August 2010 11:03

NERDGASM

me_sanchez 0

Tuesday 17 August 2010 7:32

eeeewww!!!

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Keywords

Kids Art Covid Health Birthday Relatable Awkward Cars Love Transportation Gross Family Poopoo peepee Neighbours Sex Intimacy Lonely Dreams Management Work Jealousy Relationship advice Mental health Miscellaneous Friends Abuse Parents Healthy Lifestyle Ironic Food

The Top

Today, I accidentally posted an extensive, negative review of the gynecologist I visited earlier this week. I messed up and posted it from my work's customer service email, so now it looks like the large, well-known company I work for had a poor gynecological experience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 875

You deserved it 23 114

Today, I went to a fancy restaurant. I was coming right from work and brought a change of clothes with me. I parked in an empty corner of the parking lot to change. As I was pulling my pants up, I noticed that I was facing an apartment complex where an old guy was watching me from his balcony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 272

You deserved it 19 597

The Top

Today, I asked a guy out. He told me no. Well, his exact words were "I would never go out with a whale, sorry." Then he went on to make whale noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 039

You deserved it 4 211

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 575

You deserved it 9 399

Today, I had to hunt down and collect a stray dog's feces for my parasitology class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 188

You deserved it 3 505

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 241

You deserved it 5 803

Today, after five months of not working, I have a check waiting for me at the office. Too bad the office is in another city. My gas tank is empty, and I have no money to put gas in my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 198

You deserved it 3 651

Today, I was watching TV with my mom, when a plumbing ad came on. A hot guy showed up on-screen and said, "I'm here to snake your drain." My mom immediately piped up with, "Oh, I'd let him snake my drain any day." Thanks for that imagery, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 722

You deserved it 3 301