Health, Mental health, Weird, Religion and Nightmare: Cocobananas - FML

Cocobananas

By Anonymous - 20/12/2022 14:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, while celebrating my 10 years home from Iraq, my brother told us about his new affiliation with Scientology. Apparently, all those roadside bombs I keep dreaming about are just alien ghosts that need to be purged. What's worse is how well it fuses with his new brand of politics: YouTube QAnon channels! FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 129

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

Get better friends

By Q strikes again - 03/07/2022 00:00

Today, I introduced my two crazy friends who are both into QAnon to each other. It went so poorly that now they fight online over who has better facts, and they both complain to me about the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 922

Whining at life

By 847 - 05/10/2022 15:30 - United States

Today, to get my wife off my back, I introduced our two single friends who are both into QAnon. Not only did they not click, but now they both call us regularly to embellish the insane difference between their beliefs and "what that moron believes." Same words from both of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 096

You deserved it 546

By Anonymous - 15/10/2012 07:54 - South Africa

Today, my fiancé spent three hours arguing with his mom about how Scientology is a cult followed by simple-minded asshats; she shouted at him saying Xenu will come and fuck his shit up for not believing. This woman is going to be my children's grandmother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 119

You deserved it 2 556

By NoToBombs - 07/11/2014 15:51 - United States - Santa Fe

Today, I got a new roommate. I thought he was pretty cool until he mentioned how everything around us was a conspiracy. Then he asked if I knew how to make a bomb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 354

You deserved it 2 749

By he is going to hell - 18/09/2012 21:46 - Australia - Forestville

Today, I found out my little brother is a highly committed Nazi. He goes to meetings and everything, my parents think it's great he is "getting out and developing a social life." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 412

You deserved it 2 154

Supportive siblings are the best

By Anonymous - 15/06/2022 22:00

Today, my brother celebrated 10 years of denying I exist with a Facebook post celebrating “My departed brother.” I’ve been self-secluded for 10 years with schizophrenia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 958

You deserved it 139

Scientists in disguise

By Anonymous - 06/04/2022 14:00

Today, I lost a second friend to QAnon conspiracy theories. Worst yet, he started messaging everyone I know on Facebook, telling them I'm a hypocrite who doesn’t “do his research.” Those who don’t now think he was my gay lover believe we were lab partners. What do I do with that? FML

I agree, your life sucks 806

You deserved it 193

By sonofanut - 22/02/2012 03:14 - United States

Today, I found out my mom has been stealing from me to pay for Scientology courses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 173

You deserved it 2 411

Spiritual leader

By Anonymous - 13/03/2022 04:00

Today, my girlfriend was excited because her uncle was coming for a visit. She started telling me stories about him, and the more she talked, the worse it got. I’m fairly certain uncle is a cult leader, and that my girlfriend was born into and brainwashed by a cult that got shut down by the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 318

You deserved it 97

It's a cult

By Anonymous - 25/01/2021 08:01 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I found out via Facebook that my once-favourite aunt has fully bought into the QAnon bullshit about the "stolen" US election, bible quotes and all. We live in the UK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 171

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 21 December 2022 0:51

Cut him off. If he never comes out of the rabbit hole, you don't want to deal with him.

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 20 December 2022 23:57

I guess someone attracted to one cult is likely to also be attracted to another… Hopefully you don’t have to deal with cult brother very often.

Comments

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 20 December 2022 23:57

I guess someone attracted to one cult is likely to also be attracted to another… Hopefully you don’t have to deal with cult brother very often.

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 21 December 2022 0:51

Cut him off. If he never comes out of the rabbit hole, you don't want to deal with him.

BurnInDemonFire 33

Wednesday 21 December 2022 23:43

Take him to Iraq. He'll soon change his tune.

tiptoppc 19

Saturday 24 December 2022 18:32

That’s because after he encounters the ghost, He’ll b flat-line

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The Top

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend for cheating on me. I refused his calls, so he texted, not to apologize, but to say I'd "left some clothes in his suitcase"; i.e., he stole some of my clothes. When he didn't get the response from me that he was hoping for, he texted, "I'm wearing your shorts." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 120

Today, I was driving to visit my parents for the first time in two years. After spending about $4000 to make sure my car wouldn't break down on the journey, around the halfway point, the front tire popped and the engine blew out. I'm about 5 states away from both my parents and my home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 732

You deserved it 489

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me he'd drive me to the jeweler's to pick out a ring. We drove there, I picked the ring, and the sales person rang it up. I glanced at my boyfriend, only for him to reply, "Well don't look at me!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 664

You deserved it 1 969

Today, my neighbor came over to borrow my lawnmower. As I have previously loaned it to him and he returned it broken, I refused. He then promptly ate the strawberries off my daughter's small strawberry plant and stormed off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 667

You deserved it 1 976

Today, I was in the car with my mom and dad. My mom turned around and asked, "Have you had sex yet?" I said no, which is true. My dad cracked up and said, "Told you so!" My mom frowned, took out her wallet, and handed him $20. My parents bet on my nonexistent sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 061

You deserved it 5 080

Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 551

You deserved it 12 036

Today, I finally decided to try an alternative to peanut butter, since I found out I was allergic a while back. Two hours later I had to be sent home because the allegedly allergen-free SunButter caused my lips and throat to swell and patches of rashes to form all over my body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 218

You deserved it 733

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

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You deserved it 803 800