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By Anonymous - / Friday 2 September 2016 14:50 / United Kingdom - Shepton Mallet
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By  StormfrontX33_fml  |  24

Usually, the 3 rings of marriage come in this order: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. Sounds like he started right on the last one.

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By  SpyroMello  |  27

Aw don't take it too harsh, OP. I know many men get embarrassed when doing something so special and romantic. Especially if they're the shy or "manly" like. Congratulations though, I hope you two have a wonderful life.

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  popaulina  |  8

Alright so I'm not sure that you're too keen here with reading comprehension so I'll explain: the boyfriend wasn't embarrassed, he didn't plan on paying for the ring.

By  StormfrontX33_fml  |  24

Usually, the 3 rings of marriage come in this order: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. Sounds like he started right on the last one.

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  chrisbeaudoin  |  26

But that 70s show is the part that makes the saying fun.

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  ABlindMan  |  17

Thanks 64, I'm not sure I could've lived without you informing everyone that you heard the joke 9 years ago when it's been around far longer than that. Good on you though.

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If that's the case, he should have made it clear before they went into the store that they were just browsing. Now he's upset OP and the employee lost a sale. Shitty all around.

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Not really. You can know you're going to receive a proposal (which I would hope there would be enough communication to know it is coming at some point because both parties want it) and still be surprised when it happens. The person propsing doesn't have to give all the details. Plus by browsing the recipient can illustrate their taste and style and not know which of the rings is actually chosen until if happens. If you're even somewhat smart, it's easy to still make the proposal a surprise.

By  captainsmegma  |  12

Purchasing and picking are two different things. No problem here.

By  Ging3rSnap  |  9

I bought my own engagement ring, money was tight for both of us and I picked out a very nice fake ring for around $175. People still thinks it's real and I get compliments on it all the time. It's just a symbol, there should be no obligation for the guy to buy the ring. That being said, he was misleading a bit in how he set up the situation, it should've been something discussed before hand. If you can't have conversations about finances and how money should be handled then that's red flag for going into a marriage.

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  Kaylana_fml  |  27

I couldn't agree with #8 more. It is the meaning behind the ring that is important, not the price. But this guy devalued the ring, the moment, and the OP all in one blow. I sincerely hope the OP did not buy the ring, she'll never associate it with anything but this horrible memory.

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#8 I can't disagree anymore then the horror of you saying the guy shouldn't be obligated to buy a ring. It's one thing to discuss being in a tight situation with money. What he did was down right insulting to OP. I would dump his ass immediately, he doesn't deserve her. I'm so sorry OP one day you'll get a proper proposal with a real man!

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I'm not one for traditions, I don't think the cost of the ring matters, and it is just a symbol. However, I look at an engagement ring as sort of a gift for the impending marriage. It's a symbol you want to take this step with them, and it's a way to ask, or say this, which is why I don't think you should provide it for yourself. This is why I think the opposite party should buy the ring for the other person, the guy for the girl, the girl for the guy, and for same-sex couples too, the other person buys the ring to give to their partner. You don't generally buy a gift for yourself, you're not asking you to marry you, your partner is asking you. That's just my view.

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  rsue  |  12

There's nothing in the world wrong with that -- my fiance is still saving up for my ring. The problem is that OP's boyfriend very heavily implied that he would be buying the ring and then abruptly backed out in front of the jeweler. This is not only a hurtful surprise to OP but also puts her in an awkward situation in front of a stranger. The problem isn't him not buying the ring, it's him leading in making it seem like he was buying it and then dumping it in her lap.

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When my parents got married, money was tight, and my mom was okay with not getting an engagement ring. Not everyone is an extreme traditionalist, and that's fine. As has been stated by others, the problem is how the boyfriend misled OP.

By  brenton490  |  19

well he did say pick. No where in that sentence did it say buy or purchase.

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  J352SAURUS  |  30

The way I see it, him buying the ring is kind-of implied. Especially if it was out of the blue. To me it sounds like this was not discussed beforehand. I highly doubt he just said "Come on, I'll take you to the jewelery store so you can buy your own ring!"

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  Blitz3r  |  3

Why should it be implied. He said to pick not purchase.

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  J352SAURUS  |  30

Why should it be implied? Really? What do you do with a ring after you pick it out? You buy it. Unless he specifically stated that they were going to the jewellery store to pick out a ring to buy at a later date, I think it's safe to say he was going to buy it then and there. What if OP had been nagging the boyfriend to get married though? What if she had been nagging to go "pick out a ring" and this is his idea of a joke to show his position? Like, 'here, you've picked out a ring now, so I've done what you wanted me to do. You never said I had to pay for it though, you just said you wanted to pick it out, so there you go. You want to get married, you pay for it!' Now in that scenario, OP would feel that it would be implied that the boyfriend paid for it. That's the only scenario I can imagine where your comment would feel right at home. I think we could do with some background information. But guys, my instruments are malfunctioning. Am I feeding a troll here?

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