Intimacy: Cheers, asshat

Cheers, asshat

By gross - 15/07/2011 01:09 - Canada

Today, I was playing my guitar outside my apartment building, and some people had put some money in my guitar case. One guy threw in what I thought was a crumpled piece of paper or something. It was actually a used condom. It leaked all over the money and my case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 353

You deserved it 5 036

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Same thing different taste

Tiptony Buskertano

By Jesus - 21/04/2009 14:39 - United States

Today, I was playing guitar on the sidewalk and had my guitar case open for tips. A man came up with a folded piece of green paper, smiled and walked away. After I was finished, I looked at my tips. I unfolded the paper, it was a note that said "You suck!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 984

You deserved it 11 453

Money Money Money

By Anonymous - 12/03/2020 08:00

Today, as I was coming out of McDonald's, there was a street musician playing outside. He had his saxophone case open for money. I meant to give him a ten, and it wasn't until I got home later that I realized I'd accidentally given him a hundred-dollar bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 755

You deserved it 1 654

By CircleBruise - 08/06/2010 23:58 - United States

Today, I was playing my guitar and singing on the street corner. I did earn money, when some guy threw a quarter out of his car window for me. It hit me in the face. I now have a circle shaped bruise under my eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 475

You deserved it 5 886

By totallyembarassed - 07/07/2012 04:08 - United States - Charlotte

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 993

You deserved it 28 757

By Jake - 02/10/2012 11:52 - United States - Athens

Today, I woke up with a used condom on my face. Turns out my roommate had sex with his girlfriend during the night and instead of getting up and throwing it away, he decided to throw it across the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 591

You deserved it 2 802

By peopleinthepark - 30/05/2009 14:46 - United States

Today, it was beautiful out. I decided to play guitar at the park near my house. I left my guitar case open, asking not for money but for feedback. I got two pieces of paper with feedback: 1) You're fat. 2) Get a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 950

You deserved it 13 436

By Anonymous - 31/07/2012 03:36 - United States - Chicago

Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 446

You deserved it 42 532

Sex is out of the window

By Anonymous - 30/01/2022 13:59

Today, I heard a woman moaning while I was walking on a sidewalk. I didn't mind, until someone dropped a recently-used condom on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 512

You deserved it 139

By honeynuggetviolin - 01/05/2013 00:31

Today, I spent hours playing my guitar and singing in the street, hoping to make some extra cash. About 3 hours in, I realized some punk had been walking around with a hat taking money as if he was with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 954

You deserved it 5 735

By Otherguy - 18/11/2008 07:36 - France

Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 972

You deserved it 9 411

howslife123 0

Friday 15 July 2011 9:05

I saw a lady throw a bag of dog shit into a guitar case once and the guy sniffed it true story

Calivale 7

Friday 15 July 2011 9:07

eww what an ass. that's messed up.

Comments

dudeitsdanny 9

Friday 15 July 2011 10:12

Anyone else reminded of Family Guy, when they make fun of douchey guys who play their guitars in public?

lalala2589 0

Friday 15 July 2011 22:14

How is it douchey to play guitars in public? Does that mean it's also douchey to go to the park and play football? Would it be douchey to go jogging around your neighborhood because other people can see you?

jamjelly386 5

Friday 15 July 2011 10:24

....money is money...?

GamerMatt97 0

Friday 15 July 2011 10:55

be careful u might get an std and hopefully u kicked his ass

LikDezNutz 0

Friday 15 July 2011 12:58

Except that wouldn't really be possible unless he put it to his mouth..I don't think that'll happen anytime soon.

wriptidez 0

Friday 15 July 2011 10:57

maybe soak the money in a bucket of mild soap wear long gloves???

Ranimal 12

Friday 15 July 2011 11:04

I'm sorry but YDI. First off, not everybody wants to hear your guitar playing and it's a bit trashy. 2nd, pick a different venue and not in front of an apartment even if it's yours. I'm sure there are people that don't want to be listening to that shit when they are inside their own home.

DjeePee 24

Friday 15 July 2011 11:17

And therefore OP deserves it to have an used condom be thrown in his belongings? Nope, I disagree with you. If a musician annoys you, ask him/her gently to play in another street. Being respectful doesn't harm people, you know.

ReynshineCutting 10

Friday 15 July 2011 16:19

You can totally play your own freaking guitar in front of your own freaking apartment. How is it any different than playing on your balcony or something? If one of his neighbors didn't like it they could have easily said something to him.

CryMoreFMLs 14

Friday 15 July 2011 19:15

Hey 65, I'm blunt and honest too! Guess what! You look and sound like a complete dick! How's that for blunt honesty eh?

lalala2589 0

Friday 15 July 2011 22:17

And maybe not everyone wants to read you opinions. So I guess you should get used condoms thrown at you.

sovetskiy 8

Friday 15 July 2011 23:39

I agree. op deserves it for being a tool. don't put your guitar case out open like you expect tips.

lalala2589 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:02

He didn't say he was expecting tips, people voluntarily gave him money. If guitarist can't play for fun and leave the opportunity to get tips, than why should waiters, bell hops or cleaners be able to expect tips on top of a salary w/o being criticized?

lalala2589 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 3:10

Besides, a decent (not top of the line, just decent) guitar case costs anywhere from $100 - $200. That may not sound like a lot to some people, but for the purpose it has, it is a lot. It's like spending $50 on a phone case, it's a lot of money for what it is. OP certainly didn't deserve to have that ruined because one guy disagreed with what he was doing. What ever happened to respect? He could've just asked him to stop if he didn't like it.