Caught off guard

By dooommage - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 376
You deserved it 15 346
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Same thing different taste

Not a morning person at the best of times

By shouldhavestayedinbed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my doorbell rang while I was still in bed. I leapt out and immediately got a severe cramp in one leg, then, staggering around trying to throw some clothes on, I scraped the other leg badly enough to draw blood. When I got to the door there was nobody there, just a parcel on the doorstep. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 685
You deserved it 2 162
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Top comments

Easy_Target 0

That must have been an interesting conversation. "Hello? Hey, man, how's your dOOOOOOOOOOOHHhhhh....!!!"

43 2
ddrluna 2

Who else thinks that 10 needs to calm the shit down? It's called playing with your pets. I suppose you'd rather just let them lay in a corner their whole life?

24 1

Comments

Easy_Target 0

That must have been an interesting conversation. "Hello? Hey, man, how's your dOOOOOOOOOOOHHhhhh....!!!"

43 2
Boomi 38

My brother is rough like that, and when he tried to chase the cats (he's three), he jumped on me. Let's just say I'm glad I'm a girl or it would've been much worse.

1 0
mikejacobs 0

To #1, yeah I bet after the dOOOOOhhhhh, he probably said "oh you f**cking pussy, get off me"!

13 5
earwig12 1

That's what you get for owning a cat.

12 8
a1m2a3d4o5 0

hahahahaha and owch that sucks , #1 LOL

2 2
SimpleIdiot 0

ouch! that happened to me before

2 1
xMooMoox 0

Didn't you mother ever tell you not to tease people? Especially not beasts!

2 5
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0

Ahh... My cat wouldn't even become interested in the string. LOL. Your cat just owned you.

7 2
Marlygirl 0

Dude the "beast" owned you!! XD

1 3
gs_fml 0

are u a ******* asshole or what???? NEVER tease a cat with string. one bite and u can pay for the surgery. thats why people like u shouldnt own cats or any other kind of innocent animal for that matter ASSHOLE YDI 100%

2 47
ifmlftw 0

I love when people overreact. my cat has fun when I do that to her

10 1
Sesh54 7

by teasing he meant that he was playing with it just cause he wanted to play with his cat doesn't mean he deserved it

8 1
Audiobliss 9

wow. sensitive much? I'm sure you're the life of any party you attend... *rolls eyes*

8 0
hilda_kitty 16

I bet you're also a vegetarian and fully support PETA and think that lions and zebras can get along. Chill, don't you get teased by your friends in a friendly way? Same thing with a cat.

7 0
WhitneyShehan 10

Actually, if you have ever seen the show, "My Cat From Hell," you'd know that you're 100% wrong. Cats become MORE aggressive when you don't play with them. Although, the host offers many toys for your cat to play with, I've never seen plain string. Which I'm sure would still be just as fine, just as a feather toy would be. He says on every show, that I've seen, that you need to play with your cat on a daily basis, working on their, "hunting" skills. As they would use them everyday if they were feral or non-domesticated animals. So slow your roll and know the facts before you flip out and go crazy with your, "YDI" rant.

1 0