Mental health, Embarrassing, Thief and Scary: Brain fart

Brain fart

By jonjon - 13/06/2010 13:16 - United States

Today, after spending the evening with friends, I went home and realized that the living room light was on. Thinking someone was robbing me, I hid behind a bush. I got impatient and crept up to the door. Then I remembered that I'd left the light on before I left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 954

You deserved it 47 290

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Same thing different taste

Fright night

By Anonyme - 04/11/2023 11:00 - United Kingdom - Cheddleton

Today, I couldn’t sleep because the hall light was too bright. Someone left their room; I waited for them to return so we wouldn’t cross paths. I got up and went for the light, only to find them peeing naked with the door open. In a panic I flipped any switch, which made the hall brighter, then ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 110

Stealthy roommate

By AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA - 15/03/2023 00:00 - United States

Today, I had to go to the bathroom, but the door was closed. I waited until I was pretty much about to explode, and eventually yelled, "Are you okay?" and my roommate replied, "What are you talking about? Oh, sorry. I left the light on." How do you close the door and forget to turn off the light? FML

I agree, your life sucks 622

You deserved it 364

Scaredy cat

By amazinghermit - 25/11/2014 04:21 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I spent an hour in my car terrified to go inside because I thought my house was being burgled. I saw rapid shadows in the light of my lounge. Eventually I plucked up the courage to creep inside with a rock to find it wasn't a robber. It was my cats, fighting in front of a toppled lamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 187

You deserved it 6 567

By Anonymous - 09/01/2017 23:42

Today, I was the last to go upstairs, so I had to turn off the lights. My tired brain decided to use my phone flashlight to check if all the lights were out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 076

You deserved it 1 195

Caught

By Anonymous - 25/10/2015 02:47 - United States - Apollo

Today, I woke up to noises in my living room. I was scared, but I loaded my gun and snuck downstairs. I burst into the living room, yelled for the motherfucker robbing me to put his hands up, and flicked on the light. My cat stared back at me like I was a moron then calmly walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 596

You deserved it 7 907

Spooked

By Anonymous - 15/11/2010 05:08

Today, I thought my house was being broken into in the dead of night. Frightened, I dismounted a floor lamp as a makeshift weapon and crept through the house, channelling my inner Ellen Ripley. It turned out to be the wireless printer with a paper jam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 791

You deserved it 6 770

By haunted - 24/11/2011 20:30 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 620

You deserved it 4 824

Grounded

By cock sauce - 09/06/2012 21:15 - Switzerland - Luzern

Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 377

You deserved it 29 653

By LacrosseFAIL - 16/07/2016 22:33 - United States - Schaumburg

Today, after a long day at work, I walked into my room with the lights off and jumped on my bed. At least I would've if I haven't rearranged my room and instead face-planted onto my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 087

You deserved it 4 800

By yuuupyup - 18/04/2012 00:55 - United States - Somerset

Today, while driving home, I realized I forgot my house key. Luckily, when I arrived home, someone had already broken into my house. Guess I didn't need the key. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 424

You deserved it 2 038

Katee0_o 6

Sunday 13 June 2010 19:12

Yah when I see a light on I automatically assume I'm being robbed.

JessKraze 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 19:10

That's okay sounds like something I would do if I forgot that I left the light on.

Comments

tbonea1990 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 20:52

dude don't be a wimp always have a weapon in every room of ur house. I have 1-2 knives in every room along with a bat or steel pole. protect yourself

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Monday 14 June 2010 19:56

That would be an appropriate comment had OP already been inside the house. Or did you forget to mention the hatchets and flamethrowers you hide in your bushes?

usnwolf 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 21:33

you're a ******* pussy.

OreoHasFml 5

Sunday 13 June 2010 21:43

how is THAT a fml? so you made a mistake. i make mistakes all the time and i dont go blabbing it on fml

rawrimadinosour 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 21:49

Ha Ha that happens to me all the time lol.

allamericankid 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 21:49

pls don't reproduce

shut_the_Fuck_up 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 21:58

Dumbass

CroakieNBoatshoe 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 22:58

I understand we make mistakes and leave the lights on. I get it, we have all done it. But, to be trippy enough that Oh shit Im being robbed and hiding in the bushes. Congradulations, you get my Goddamnit your a dumb ass award of the day.