Dogs, Awkward and Animals: Bad boy - FML

Bad boy

By PicklesMcRaptor - 25/03/2012 11:59 - United States - Miami

Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 703

You deserved it 3 583

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 20/05/2009 20:22 - United States

Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!" Without thinking, I replied, "You too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 290

You deserved it 44 865

By chris - 09/06/2009 17:09 - United States

Today, I was walking my new dog and saw this girl that I've had a crush on for months. When I approached her, I tried to look 'macho' with my dog. However my dog thought it would be more attractive to pee on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 865

You deserved it 10 779

By Anonymous - 05/06/2012 19:34 - United States - Pocatello

Today, I approached a cute girl at a club, when she started barking at me like a rabid dog. Thinking she might be mentally unhinged, I left, only to see the same girl laughing her ass off with her friends minutes later. When I went back over, her friends started barking at me too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 705

You deserved it 6 818

By BIZZMAL - 05/01/2011 02:44 - United States

Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 311

You deserved it 32 612

So cute

By Randomm - 12/12/2019 20:00

Today, I was walking into my school and I saw two girls kissing. Being a lesbian myself, and thinking it would be cute, I winked at them. I guess one of them had a history of cheating with a girl who looked just like me, because her girlfriend came up and punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 877

You deserved it 1 194

By fmlman - 15/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Rawlins

Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 371

You deserved it 6 379

By anon - 19/06/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, I took my dog for a walk. It became friendly with another dog, and I reached down to pet them both. Suddenly, an old woman runs up to me and whacks me with her cane repeatedly. Apparently, her previous dog had been kidnapped by a woman who looked a lot like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 238

You deserved it 2 809

By psh_idontbite - 13/03/2015 03:55 - United States

Today, I was walking my dog around my neighborhood, when I saw this really cute boy. My dog then saw a squirrel and dragged me through mud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 714

You deserved it 3 555

By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 159

You deserved it 9 122

By emma_waters23 - 26/04/2013 00:11 - United States - Long Beach

Today, I was walking my dog. A cute guy stopped me and said, "Wow, you are gorgeous!" I said thanks. He looked at me like I was nuts and said, "Not you, your dog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 823

You deserved it 6 003

Next

Top comments

ElricMustang 23

Sunday 25 March 2012 16:10

Damn; the dog beat you to it. FYL

beaglegun2009 4

Sunday 25 March 2012 16:10

Good doggy!!

Comments

br0ccoli 14

Sunday 25 March 2012 19:39

Your bitch could tell she was ovulating. "This human is mine!"

_MidnightLuna_ 17

Sunday 25 March 2012 20:02

Your dog has the right idea... ;)

Floseph 0

Sunday 25 March 2012 20:08

Is your dog's name Chuck Norris?

lrgenesis 19

Sunday 25 March 2012 20:12

Use that as a talking point, or if she's a bitch be all "hahaha not the first time you've been mounted by another bitch is it?"

theblackninja 0

Sunday 25 March 2012 20:24

F A I L

KiddNYC1O 20

Sunday 25 March 2012 20:58

Sign your dog up for **** with your username.

WildInTheStreets 5

Sunday 25 March 2012 21:11

Doesn't matter, had sex.

meridius4510 4

Sunday 25 March 2012 22:06

Dog read ur mind.

jhicks123 10

Sunday 25 March 2012 23:53

Fake.

KRiddle 15

Monday 26 March 2012 0:16

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

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Keywords

Management Work Friends Miscellaneous Awkward Health Relatable Healthy Lifestyle Birthday Family Money Gifts Mother in law Parents Public freakouts Education Students Exams Pranks Weird Love Argument AITA Insects Fear Cats Skincare Job interview Jealousy Coworkers

The Top

Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 167

You deserved it 2 953

Today, I went to a fancy restaurant. I was coming right from work and brought a change of clothes with me. I parked in an empty corner of the parking lot to change. As I was pulling my pants up, I noticed that I was facing an apartment complex where an old guy was watching me from his balcony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 271

You deserved it 19 596

The Top

Today, a week after spending most of my paycheck on a down-payment and rent on a new apartment, I found out the "landlord" I paid was a scammer. Turns out the real owner was away on vacation, and he'd stolen most of her stuff before showing me the place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 791

You deserved it 1 391

Today, my bedroom in my gran's house gets the most sun in the evenings. There is no AC, not even a fan, and the only place cool enough to sleep is the basement. Which probably hasn’t been cleaned since the '80s, and I have to share it with the biggest spider ever and a beehive in the roller shutter casing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 271

You deserved it 188

Today, I still didn't feel quite awake after the first lesson at school, so I went to get a cup of coffee from the vending machine. I had just enough money for it. No cup dropped into the holder, and the whole thing poured straight into the drip tray while I watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 675

You deserved it 3 247

Today, after close to 10 years of marriage, my wife’s health has improved enough she is craving sex again. Just not with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 116

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 074

You deserved it 3 683

Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 924

You deserved it 5 200