About Krez
I am an adult, although I don't always act like one. I am a single parent and a part-time gamer. I am a computer programmer, a scientist, and a super genius. I am a minister and an atheist, which in retrospect is kind of funny. I am only here for the schadenfreude, although you can message me if that is your thing.
Krez - Followers
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Krez's FML badges
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • Perfectionist

    Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
  • Socialite

    You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
  • I NEED to know!

    You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
  • Checking you out

    You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
  • Night owl

    You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    1%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    1%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    4%
  • Happy ending

    Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    1%
  • I’m your new creative director

    You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
    0%
  • Picture this FML

    You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
    0%
  • I liked to the power of 20

    You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
    0%
  • My diary is a collector's item

    There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
    300%
  • Tell us what happened next

    You've commented on an FML that you sent in
    0%
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
    0%
  • Tweet, tweet

    You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
    0%
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
    68%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    1%
The list of badges to find
Krez's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband showed up late to my mother's funeral. He swaggered in, happily finishing off a half-eaten taco. His excuse for why he was so cheerful: "She was an in-law, honey." Good to know I married a piece of shit in disguise. FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 23 March 2013 17:30 / Germany - K?ln

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

By kindergarten teacher / Saturday 23 March 2013 13:25 / United States - Hanford

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML

By anony - / Wednesday 27 February 2013 13:49 / Australia - Melbourne

Today, I tossed half a sausage to a dog sitting beside a park bench. It wasn't until he lunged for it and dragged the man beside him off of the bench that I realized it was a seeing eye dog. FML

By SolaceInRage - / Wednesday 20 March 2013 23:53 / United States - Wilmette

Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML

By Anonymous - / Sunday 10 March 2013 22:37 / United States - Denison