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About Hamburgerjung

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Hamburgerjung's FML badges


You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Work is a 4-letter word

Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Happy ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I'm an early bird, but no worm yet

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 a.m.

Night owl

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return, you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.


You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.


Not one, not two, but 50 pages of the Intimacy category read. No comment.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 favorites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!


You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.


Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

YDI Master

You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.

I agree, my mouse works.

200 "I agree" votes is a good start.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.

100 kick-ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

A new thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

50 quality comments

Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

The return of the thumb

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The list of badges to find

Hamburgerjung's favorite FMLs

ThatBackfired tells us more.

Wow. This is HILARIOUS. 1) Yes, the collar VIBRATES and nothing else. I shelled out extra for the model that had no shock option whatsoever. The collar does not shock, it does not blast his ears. The second would be useless, since he’s pretty much deaf. I would never use either of those on a dog. Yes, I tried it on myself. I have far more powerful sources of vibration. Yes, I used it previously in training. He didn’t react like this. 2) Unfortunately, his previous owner left him in a crate and forgot about him, so that isn’t an option. 3) He’s good in the car and doesn’t always bark, only when he’s (a) in the car and (b) sees rescue vehicles or other large dogs. That makes it ******* hard to predict when he’s going to bark, and makes positive reinforcement pretty much impossible, since I can’t tell WHILE DRIVING A CAR if he’s seen something and not reacted. And how exactly should I give him a treat, praise, or affection when he’s in the back, I’m in the front, and he can’t hear me? 4) Next time you’re driving, shove an earbud into one ear and tell your passenger that at some point in the drive, they should turn on the MP3 player it’s connected to, which you have preset at maximum volume. Explain to them that this is perfectly safe, and will not distract you at a crucial moment in the drive or cause you any pain whatsoever. Now imagine this happens every time you get into a car with them, and you may understand why I’m trying to train it out of him.