Menuga

Today, a girl punched me square in the face, effectively leaving it with purple swellings because I called her boyfriend an "uncle". Said boyfriend IS my uncle. FML

What a hunt

Today, I was on a scavenger hunt. One of the things on the list was to ask a stranger to marry them. I saw an old lady in a wheelchair; I tried to make her day by asking her to marry me. She declined and attempted to run me over with her wheelchair. FML